Kweens Without Krowns

You drag your tired self down the bus steps and trudge towards your ramshackle house. You really should repaint that garage, or you could turn its peeling and oddly dingy yellow paint into some kind of abstract art. That might be cheaper. It looks like some of the roof shingles have been pulled up again by that pesky racoon and her brood, but you are not climbing onto the roof again, not after what happened last time. Silently, you surrender your attic to the racoons. It doesn’t really matter, since you never go up there anyway and you can always store things in the garage. The giant hole in the middle of the floor (left over from some kind of random drainage system built by the original owner years ago) means you can’t park a car in there anyway. You pull out your keys and watch the deadbolt slide back, through the gap in the doorframe. It’s a miracle you haven’t been robbed yet (and you’ve been here for 10 years!). Could it be that you have nothing worth taking? You kick off your shoes by the front door, hang up your coat, flop down on the couch and flip open your computer. 17 unread messages. You sigh. Fine. You click on your email and glance, briefly down the list. Your bank statement is ready (depressing), your grocery points card needs updating (can’t remember the password), and there’s breaking news at several popular online news sites you can’t afford a subscription to. And then, buried deep in the detritus of everyday emails, you notice one from the Not Just the North Film Company. Huh. That’s interesting. You have a vague memory of auditioning for them a few months back. You click on the email. “Hello and congratulations! You have been selected, out of several possible candidates, to play the major role of Self-Care Stylist on our new streaming reality makeover show: Kweens Without Krowns! Please present yourself at Stubble Studios on York Street, Monday, January 22 at 9:00am, for costume fitting and concept planning. We are so excited to have you! (If you decide to opt out of this once in a lifetime position, please inform us, in writing, by the end of the day today! We really hope you decide to opt-in to what is sure to be the next great thing in streaming! See you soon!)” Wow! An actual gig! You almost can’t believe it! You re-read the message and, for a moment, you wonder if it could be a scam. It does seem a bit homegrown. But, then again, this is Canada and the show is shooting in London (Ontario), not Toronto, so maybe homegrown is the way things are here. Either way, it can’t hurt to show up and check it out. You have a whole weekend to ponder the implications of being a Self-Care Stylist (whatever that is). You decide you are going to spend the time: [[Relaxing at home with a good book, a bottle of wine and a bath bomb]] [[Jogging. And eating kale. Gotta look good on Monday. How fast does it take to turn fat into muscle?]] [[Partying with the girls, like every other weekend.]]

''Relaxing at home with a good book, a bottle of wine and a bath bomb.'' There’s nothing like a weekend in when you’re about to start an exciting (hopefully) new job! Suddenly, all your problems fade into the background: the upsetting bank balance, the peeling garage paint, the boarders in the attic. Like most things in your house, your tub has seen better days. The caulking is cracked and yellowed and the bottom of the tub is irreparably scratched due to your last attempt at fostering a rescue dog. But no matter. You rip open a new dollar store package of tea lights and place them around the edge of the tub, on the back of the toilet, along the edge of the vanity and perched precariously on this wire shelf monstrosity you use for storing towels. You light the tea lights, run the bath water and uncork your wine. Then, you grab one of your Canada Reads books (you still have 5 to get through) and slide into the water, dropping in a lemon and lavender bath bomb gifted to you through your local Buy Nothing Group. The smell is a bit overwhelming, initially, and the bomb itself is oddly oily, but, you remind yourself, you can’t beat free. All this luxury and pampering is appropriate for a new Self-Care Stylist, you think as you sip your wine. True, you have no formal training in haircutting, makeup or manicuring, but by Monday, with this quality hands-on training, you will definitely be an expert. [[Monday morning, 6:30]] [[Monday morning, 7:30]] [[Monday morning, 8:30]]

''Jogging. And eating kale. Gotta look good on Monday. How fast does it take to turn fat into muscle?'' You change into your comfiest leggings, lace up your old running shoes, strap your phone to your arm and head out into the soft evening light. You warm up by walking around the block once and then, you start your jog and your playlist. The first block is just a warm up, you pant to yourself in a mantra like chant as you jog down the street. By the second block you are panting and out of breath. Just keep going. You tell yourself. It’s good for you. By the third block, your legs and your lungs are burning and you are sure you will very soon lose consciousness if you don’t stop. You slow to a walk. Your legs are jelly. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea after all. You look down at your feet, just to make sure they are still there, and think how comfortable the sidewalk looks. You feel compelled to just lie down right where you are and rest for a minute, but you don’t. Instead, you walk unsteadily back to your house, rip off your shoes and fling them across the room and flop down on your old, green couch. “I think all that hard exercise entitles me to a little treat.” You say out loud. You reach under the couch, pull out an enormous Milk and Nut Crunch bar and break off a slab. Then you remember that you were planning to have a kale salad for dinner. But you are too tired to make a kale salad. Plus, kale is not your favourite. Still, you do want to look good on Monday. You drag yourself to the kitchen and pull a bunch of kale from the back of the fridge. It’s a bit slimy. You toss it in the garbage and open your snack cupboard. There, stuffed behind the Doritos and bags of sour gummies, is the bag of kale chips you bought the last time you swore off junk food. You smile triumphantly to yourself. “See. Jogging and kale. Gonna look great on Monday.” You settle back into the couch with your chocolate and kale chips and flip on the TV. Time to get this party started. [[Monday morning, 6:30]] [[Monday morning, 7:30]] [[Monday morning, 8:30]]

''Partying with the girls, like every other weekend.'' You have the best friends, you think to yourself as you line up outside the bar. The kind of friends who drink craft beer and listen to indie music. Still, you reflect, as you shuffle slowly forward in line, maybe you should try not to drink too much this weekend. “We’re gonna get so wasted!” Screams Chloe and you wonder if she is already drunk. But you laugh along with everyone else because, you know what, you have a real job! So maybe it’s ok to celebrate that. By the time you weasel yourself into the bar for your first glass of the new Blueberry Cobbler craft beer they have on tap, all thoughts of taking it easy have evaporated. After all, you have all day tomorrow to recover. Even if you and your girlfriends go for a 3 mimosa breakfast, you’ll still have the afternoon to rest and pull yourself together for Monday. Plus, you’re only young once. Why waste it being responsible. And who knows. This might be the weekend you finally find the woman you’ve been searching for. Your soul mate. Or at least someone who finds you interesting enough to ask you out on a second date, once the alcohol has worn off. Suddenly you feel like such a failure. Luckily, Chloe is not plagued with similar thoughts and she drags you out onto the dance floor to the soul stirring refrain of “Back’d My Car ‘to the Hedge”, the new hit single by the indie group ‘Couldn’t Thinka’, as you bust out your signature dance move: knock-knees and random arms, flailing. Monday morning could not be further from your mind. [[Monday morning, 6:30]] [[Monday morning, 7:30]] [[Monday morning, 8:30]]

(set: $Monday_630 to true) ''Monday morning, 6:30'' Your Zenergy alarm wakes you up with a gentle glow and the sound of windchimes and you roll out of bed feeling refreshed and ready to go. You pick your outfit carefully, even though you know they will provide you with clothes at the studio: [[A pair of black leggings, a plain grey fitted tee, and a wine-coloured, rib-knit, mock turtleneck sweater.]] [[A pair of acid washed stretch boyfriend jeans, a button up mustard yellow blouse with a white Peter Pan collar, and a very lightly off-white cardigan.]] [[Black tights, two short ruffled black skirts, worn one on top of the other for a layered look. A long, black, asymmetrical tunic layered under a shorter, ruffled tunic, a long black wool coat and tall, clunky lace up boots in a dark ocean blue.]]

(set: $Monday_730 to true) ''Monday morning, 7:30'' You are jolted awake at 7:30 by the opening song from Hairspray blasting through your wireless speakers. You fling your arm towards your bedside table, colliding with your lamp and sending it crashing to the floor. Where is your phone? You wonder, and put your hands over your ears to drown out the jolly refrain of Good Morning Baltimore. You stumble unsteadily around your apartment and finally locate your phone under a couch cushion. You turn off the alarm and stand in the middle of the living room in your panda pyjamas taking deep calming breaths and trying to quiet the pounding of your heart. It takes a few minutes before you remember it is Monday and you are due at the set for ''Kweens Without Krowns'' in an hour! You barrel into the bathroom and dunk your head in the sink to calm the bedhead. Still not fully awake, you bumble into your bedroom and take a moment to consider your clothing options because, even though they will probably provide clothing, it wouldn’t do to show up to work in your pyjamas: [[A pair of black leggings, a plain grey fitted tee, and a wine-coloured, rib-knit, mock turtleneck sweater.]] [[A pair of acid washed stretch boyfriend jeans, a button up mustard yellow blouse with a white Peter Pan collar, and a very lightly off-white cardigan.]] [[Black tights, two short ruffled black skirts, worn one on top of the other for a layered look. A long, black, asymmetrical tunic layered under a shorter, ruffled tunic, a long black wool coat and tall, clunky lace up boots in a dark ocean blue.]]

(Set: $Monday_830 to true) ''Monday morning, 8:30'' You are pried forcefully out of a deep sleep by the sunlight beaming persistently on your face. Groggily, you reach over and poke the Home button on your phone to check the time. 8:30. Shit! You think, hurling off the covers and rocketing out of the bed. Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit! You are expected on the lot in half an hour! There’s no time to think about what you might wear so you throw on a pair of black leggings, and a long, blue, turtle neck sweater. As an afterthought, you add a batik patterned scarf. There is no time for make-up or breakfast so you pull out your phone and [[call an Uber|Uber 8:30]]

''A pair of black leggings, a plain, grey, fitted tee, and a wine-coloured, rib-knit, mock turtleneck sweater.'' You decide simple is probably best. Plus, this outfit is so comfortable and you have no idea what you will be expected to do today, so comfortable is probably your best option. Plus, the rib-knit sweater hides all the fat you did not manage to burn off on the weekend, so that’s a bonus. You get dressed quickly and look at yourself in the mirror. Hmmm. You don’t look like you know a single thing about self-care! [[You wonder if you should bother with make-up? Then you wonder if you have any make-up that hasn’t expired? Then you wonder if you can remember how to apply make-up.|Make-up]] [[Your hair might be a problem. You wonder if you should try to fix it or just leave it up to the make-up people at the studio.|Hair]] [[Oh, maybe some moisturizer would be good.|Moisturizer]]

''A pair of acid washed stretch boyrfiend jeans, a button up, mustard yellow blouse with a white Peter Pan collar, and a very lightly off-white cardigan.'' You can’t go wrong with a nice pair of boyfriend jeans and a Peter Pan collar, you think to yourself wondering where you might have read that. Still, the look is clean and passable, if a bit casual retro. But, you reflect, who’s to know your look isn’t always casual retro? You check your reflection in the mirror. [[You wonder if you should bother with make-up? Then you wonder if you have any make-up that hasn’t expired? Then you wonder if you can remember how to apply make-up.|Make-up]] [[Your hair might be a problem. You wonder if you should try to fix it or just leave it up to the make-up people at the studio.|Hair]] [[Oh, maybe some moisturizer would be good.|Moisturizer]]

''Black tights, two short, ruffled black skirts, worn one on top of the other for a layered look. A long, black, asymmetrical tunic layered under a shorter, ruffled tunic, a long black wool coat and tall, clunky lace up boots in a dark ocean blue.'' You should always try to make an impression, you think as you pull on your many layers, especially when you are the Self-Care Stylist on a soon to be viral reality make-over show. You check your reflection in the mirror. [[You wonder if you should bother with make-up? Then you wonder if you have any make-up that hasn’t expired? Then you wonder if you can remember how to apply make-up.|Make-up]] [[Your hair might be a problem. You wonder if you should try to fix it or just leave it up to the make-up people at the studio.|Hair]] [[Oh, maybe some moisturizer would be good.|Moisturizer]]

''You wonder if you should bother with make-up? Then you wonder if you have any make-up that hasn’t expired? Then you wonder if you can remember how to apply make-up.'' You decide that make-up is a must. You rush back to the bathroom, checking your watch anxiously, and yank open the drawer of your vanity. You root around in there and pull out: [[A tub of Translucent Setting Powder]] [[A tube of nude colour lipstick left over from a production of Into the Woods in which you were an extra and a stage hand.|Lipstick]] [[A palette of 25 different colours of eye-shadow called Rapturous Vibes.|Eye-shadow]]

''Your hair might be a problem. You wonder if you should try to fix it or just leave it up to the make-up people at the studio.'' Your short hair is dyed an unnatural purple-y red colour and is really due for a cut. But a global pandemic that ravaged the land for more than a year has just been reined in and you haven’t had time to deal with the hairmagedden yet. You dig out a tub of very old, very sticky pomade and run a little bit of it through the hair on the top of your head. Aside from making your hair a bit spikey and wet-looking, it does not help your look. You decide to leave the rest up to the stylists at the studio and head to the kitchen to make breakfast. You yank open the fridge and pull out: [[A pre-mixed baggie of frozen fruit, half an avocado and a tetra-pak of oat milk.]] [[A toaster strudel]] [[A jar of peanut butter and a loaf of whole grain bread.]]

''Oh, maybe some moisturizer would be good.'' You slather on some bargain moisturizer, feeling the familiar burn of possibly toxic ingredients, and hurry into the kitchen to prepare some breakfast. You yank open the fridge and pull out: [[A pre-mixed baggie of frozen fruit, half an avocado and a tetra-pak of oat milk.]] [[A toaster strudel]] [[A jar of peanut butter and a loaf of whole grain bread.]]

''A tub of Translucent Setting Powder'' You pop open the lid and use the little brush applicator it came with to dust your face with the translucent powder. You look in the mirror. It makes your skin look shimmery and healthy and covers up the pimple that sprouted over your left eye-brow overnight. You consider plucking some of the wilder looking eyebrow hairs but you don’t have time. If the studio doesn’t like it, they will fix it, you remind yourself. Feeling chuffed about your choice (and ignoring the slight burning sensation caused by the powder which expired more than a year ago), you head to the kitchen to grab some breakfast. You pull open the fridge and take out: [[A pre-mixed baggie of frozen fruit, half an avocado and a tetra-pak of oat milk.]] [[A toaster strudel]] [[A jar of peanut butter and a loaf of whole grain bread.]]

''A tube of nude colour lipstick left over from a production of Into the Woods in which you were an extra and a stage hand.'' “It’s not much to work with.” You think to yourself, spreading it on to see the effect. Your mouth fills with a terrible bitter taste and you shove your face under a tap of scalding hot water and scrub madly at your lips while simultaneously rinsing your mouth out until the bitter taste fades and there is no trace of lipstick. You look in the mirror. Your face is red and patchy from the hot water but your lips are now a full, luscious red from all the scrambled scrubbing. It’s not so bad, you decide. And if the studio wants you to look different, they will fix it. You dry your face and head to the kitchen to grab some breakfast. You open the fridge and take out: [[A pre-mixed baggie of frozen fruit, half an avocado and a tetra-pak of oat milk.]] [[A toaster strudel]] [[A jar of peanut butter and a loaf of whole grain bread.]]

''A palette of 25 different colours of eye-shadow called Rapturous Vibes.'' You wrestle the plastic top open and look at the array of sparkly colours. After a moment you choose a light green colour and spread it onto your eyelid. You look in the mirror, snort in disgust and wash the eye shadow off your face. You decide that eyeshadow does not work as a stand-alone make-up element. The thought makes you feel kind of proud. A Self-Care Stylist would be expected to know these things, you think. You toss the eyeshadow back into the drawer and head to the kitchen to find some breakfast. You open the fridge and grab: [[A pre-mixed baggie of frozen fruit, half an avocado and a tetra-pak of oat milk.]] [[A toaster strudel]] [[A jar of peanut butter and a loaf of whole grain bread.]]

''A pre-mixed baggie of frozen fruit, half an avocado and a tetra-pak of oat milk.'' You dump the whole lot into your blender and push go. As the ingredients grind themselves into a paste that your friends assure you is an extremely cancer preventing way to start the day, you leaf through a self-care magazine you picked up at the pharmacy yesterday. It is called ''Tantalize'' and was on clearance for 85% off. You tear out two articles that you think might be helpful to read: [[“Hair care, is it all it’s cracked up to be?” And, “My Cheekbones, Myself-highlighting the good, hiding the bad.”|Hair care]] [[“Dry skin dilemmas-are you over-sloughing?” And, “Beers, Beards and Backyards-how hipsters are ruining the noble art of facial hair.”|Dry Skin]] [[“Dandruff for Dummies-fix the flakes and prevent lice at the same time!” And, “Kiss your Manicurist Goodbye-Nailcare for Everyone!”|Dandruff]]

''A toaster strudel'' You shove a wildberry toaster strudel into the toaster oven, tear open the icing package and squeeze some of it into your mouth. Mmmm, sugar. Most of your friends outgrew toaster strudels after high school when they started to become aware that they would not live forever and that taking care of their health early might pay off in the long run. Of course, those are the same friends who are now married with kids and who subscribe to organic produce boxes and sustainably sourced furniture. Just thinking about them makes you feel like a failure. You sigh and throw the rest of the icing packet away. You slump down at your kitchen table and leaf through the magazine you bought at the pharmacy yesterday. It is called ''Tantalize'' and was on clearance for 85% off. You tear out two articles that you think might be helpful to read: [[“Hair care, is it all it’s cracked up to be?” And, “My Cheekbones, Myself-highlighting the good, hiding the bad.”|Hair care]] [[“Dry skin dilemmas-are you over-sloughing?” And, “Beers, Beards and Backyards-how hipsters are ruining the noble art of facial hair.”|Dry Skin]] [[“Dandruff for Dummies-fix the flakes and prevent lice at the same time!” And, “Kiss your Manicurist Goodbye-Nailcare for Everyone!”|Dandruff]]

''A jar of peanut butter and a loaf of whole grain bread.'' You pull out a slice of bread and shove it in the toaster. While you wait for the toaster to work its magic, you thumb through a self-care magazine you picked up at the pharmacy yesterday. It is called ''Tantalize'' and was on clearance for 85% off. You tear out two articles that you think might be helpful to read: [[“Hair care, is it all it’s cracked up to be?” And, “My Cheekbones, Myself-highlighting the good, hiding the bad.”|Hair care]] [[“Dry skin dilemmas-are you over-sloughing?” And, “Beers, Beards and Backyards-how hipsters are ruining the noble art of facial hair.”|Dry Skin]] [[“Dandruff for Dummies-fix the flakes and prevent lice at the same time!” And, “Kiss your Manicurist Goodbye-Nailcare for Everyone!”|Dandruff]]

(set: $haircare to true) ''“Hair care, is it all it’s cracked up to be?” And, “My Cheekbones, Myself: Highlighting the Good, Hiding the Bad.”'' You skim the articles. The hair care article is about sodium laureth sulfate and the damage it does to the environment and the article about cheekbones looks like an extended advertisement for blush powder. Still, it would probably be good if you had some idea of current issues in self-care, so you fold the articles neatly together and stick them in the outermost pocket of your bag. You feel a bit anxious about this new job, mostly because you lied on your resume in order to get it and you can’t remember the exact details of those lies. You are determined to do a stellar job as a Self-Care Stylist, despite this somewhat inauthentic beginning, so you shove an apple in your bag for later (in case they don’t feed you on the set), down your breakfast and: (if: $Monday_630 is true)[ [[Head out to catch the bus.|Bus 6:30]] [[Hop on your bike! It’s a beautiful day for a ride!|Bike 6:30]] [[Call an Uber|Uber 6:30]]](elseif: $Monday_730 is true)[ [[Head out to catch the bus.|Bus 7:30]] [[Call an Uber|Uber 7:30]]]

(set: $dandruff to true) ''“Dandruff for Dummies-fix the flakes and prevent lice at the same time!” And, “Kiss your Manicurist Goodbye-Nailcare for Everyone!”'' You take a quick glance through the articles. Both are instructional, which could be useful in your role as Self-Care Stylist. The first one contains a recipe for getting rid of dandruff using easy ingredients you already have in your kitchen. Plus, according to the article, because it contains vinegar, it discourages lice from nesting in your hair. Gross but useful information, you think, folding the article neatly and putting it in the outer pocket of your bag where you can easily grab it if you need to. The second article is about nail care and includes such detailed instructions for the care and keeping of pristine fingertips that you are startled when you phone beeps a reminder that it is time to head to the studio. You tuck this article into your bag as well, grab a granola bar for later (in case they don’t feed you at the studio) and, forgetting entirely about breakfast: (if: $Monday_630 is true)[ [[Head out to catch the bus.|Bus 6:30]] [[Hop on your bike! It’s a beautiful day for a ride!|Bike 6:30]] [[Call an Uber|Uber 6:30]]](elseif: $Monday_730 is true)[ [[Head out to catch the bus.|Bus 7:30]] [[Call an Uber|Uber 7:30]]]

(set: $dryskin to true) ''“Dry skin dilemmas-are you over-sloughing?” And, “Beers, Beards and Backyards-how hipsters are ruining the noble art of facial hair.”'' You allow yourself a single, disdainful eye-roll, fold the two articles neatly together and stick them in the outermost pocket of your bag, where you can reach them easily and discreetly in case you need to prove your expertise as a Self-Care Stylist. Pffft! You think to yourself. If all it takes is judging facial hair and providing clearly obvious skin care tips, you are going to sail through this job, no problem. You quickly throw together a sandwich for later (in case they don’t feed you on the set), down your breakfast and: (if: $Monday_630 is true)[ [[Head out to catch the bus.|Bus 6:30]] [[Hop on your bike! It’s a beautiful day for a ride!|Bike 6:30]] [[Call an Uber|Uber 6:30]]](elseif: $Monday_730 is true)[ [[Head out to catch the bus.|Bus 7:30]] [[Call an Uber|Uber 7:30]]]

(set: $bike_630 to true) ''Bike 630'' You are pretty sure showing up early, on your bike, is going to be good for your image on this show. As you peddle off towards the studio (which is, handily, only a 10 minute or so bike ride away), you tell yourself you’re just taking care of your self-care needs like any good Self-Care Stylist would. You arrive at the studio in plenty of time, wheel your bike onto the lot (which is really a large, unused parking lot next to the courthouse, now overrun with portables and trailers) and look around. You pull out your phone and re-read the email. Hmmm. No mention of who you should look for. You decide to try the coffee stand on the corner of the lot. You may as well treat yourself to a latte while you sort out what it is you are supposed to be doing. You casually (or as casually as you can while wheeling a bike) join the line-up for the coffee hut. The tall black-haired goddess in front of you turns around and smiles benignly at you. “You here for the show?” “Yes.” You reply, a bit self-consciously. “Me too! I’m Magenta. I’m the Self-Help and Culture Consultant.” “Nice to meet you,” You manage to sputter, overawed by her presence. “I’m Vanessa Johnson, Self-Care Stylist.” You nod pleasantly at each other (due to a recently vanquished pandemic, shaking hands is out of fashion at the moment). Magenta orders a large tiramisu latte with extra foam and whipped cream and then steps aside to wait for you to make your order. You order: [[A single shot of espresso]] [[A medium peppermint mocha with oat milk]] [[A large Yerba Mate tea]]

(set: $Uber_630 to true) ''Uber 6:30'' You look at your watch. There is plenty of time to get to the studio, but it can’t hurt to get there early and have a look around. When the Uber arrives to pick you up, you are pleased to see that it is your favourite Uber driver, Henri. “Vanessa!” He says cheerfully. “Good morning! You’re out and about a bit early today, aren’t you?” “I got a job at a movie set downtown!” You squeal at him. Henri winks at you. “What! Congratulations! You’re going to knock their socks off!” “I hope so.” You say tentatively. Henri looks at you and smiles his big, bright smile. “Listen. You just be tough and do your best.” He says. “You’re a talented person, Vanessa. They’ll see it, don’t you worry!” “Thanks Henri.” You say, taking a deep, calming breath. First days at new jobs always make you feel anxious. Henri drops you off at the courthouse. “The studio is set up in that lot right across the street there.” He says, pointing at the bustling lot. “Thanks so much Henri!” You say cheerily. “Wish me luck!” “Good luck Kween!” He trills and honks his horn once in celebration. You cross the street to the lot. The normally empty parking lot is now overrun with portables and trailers. It does look like the set of a reality TV show, you think, as you step over the concrete parking barrier and look around. The lot is a bustle of activity. People in headphones and t-shirts scurry to and fro with their clipboards and digital tablets. Other people stand around drinking out of plain white paper cups. Someone else is fixing lights up on impossibly skinny metal poles. Now that you are here, you have no idea what you are supposed to do. You pull out your phone and re-read the email. Hmmm. No mention of who you should look for. You decide to try the coffee stand on the corner of the lot. You may as well treat yourself to a latte while you sort out what it is you are supposed to be doing. You casually join the line-up for the coffee hut. The tall black-haired goddess in front of you turns around and smiles benignly at you. “You here for the show?” “Yes.” You reply, a bit self-consciously. “Me too! I’m Magenta. I’m the Self-Help and Culture Consultant.” “Nice to meet you,” You manage to sputter, overawed by her presence. “I’m Vanessa Johnson, Self-Care Stylist.” You nod pleasantly at each other (due to a recently vanquished pandemic, shaking hands is out of fashion at the moment). Magenta orders a large tiramisu latte with extra foam and whipped cream and then steps aside to wait for you to make your order. You order: [[A single shot of espresso]] [[A medium peppermint mocha with oat milk]] [[A large Yerba Mate tea]]

(set: $Bus_730 to true) ''Bus 7:30'' Luckily the bus stop is not far from your house so you don’t have to wait long for good old number 4. The bus drops you off across the street from courthouse. The normally empty parking lot is now overrun with portables and trailers. It does look like the set of a reality TV show, you think as you step over the concrete parking barrier and look around. The lot is a bustle of activity even though it is not yet 9:00. People in headphones and t-shirts scurry to and fro with their clipboards and digital tablets. Other people are standing around drinking out of plain white paper cups. Someone else is fixing lights up on impossibly skinny metal poles. You pull out your phone and reread the email. Hmmm. No mention of who you should look for. You scan the lot for any indication of where you should go and spot a small line-up in front of what looks like it might once have been a French fry hut. You stick your phone back into your bag and walk over to the line-up. A tall, black haired goddess steps away from the hut holding a tall, steamy cup and looks you up and down appraisingly. “You here for the show?” “Yes.” You reply, a bit self-consciously. “Me too! I’m Magenta. I’m the Self-Help and Culture Consultant.” “Nice to meet you,” You manage to sputter, overawed by her presence. “I’m Vanessa Johnson, Self-Care Stylist.” You nod pleasantly at each other (due to a recently vanquished pandemic, shaking hands is out of fashion at the moment) and before the pause can turn awkward you ask: “What did you order?” Magenta closes her eyes and takes a long sip of her drink. “It’s a Tiramisu Latte with oat milk and it is the most decadent thing I have every tasted. A real treat for a Monday morning.” “That sounds delicious!” You say, relieved that the French fry hut is actually a café. “Maybe I’ll order one too.” Magenta shakes her head and opens her mouth to speak but before she can get a word out a voice behind you says: “If you two are all set, I’ll take you to the AD’s trailer. She’s waiting for you.” You spin around. Standing behind you is a tall young man wearing plaid pants and suspenders over a grey and yellow cardigan. For a moment you are too stunned by his clothing choices to say anything. “I’m the Parking Captain, Teddy.” He reassures you. “I’m glad you’re here. We were all a bit worried when you missed the car.” “Wait.” You say. “They sent a car?” “Didn’t you get the email?” “The email I got didn’t say anything about sending a car.” You explain. “Oh, well, just so you know, from now on we’ll send a car.” Teddy tells you. “And I’ll check up on why you didn’t get an email telling you so already.” He makes a note on his clipboard and adjusts a small earpiece in his left ear. “Alexa is waiting for you.” He says. “Come with me.” “Oh, but I was just going to get a coffee.” You protest. Teddy shakes his head. “No time for that.” He says. “We try to start at 9:00 sharp.” You nod, feeling kind of disappointed and follow behind Magenta as Teddy leads you towards a cluster of trailers at the far end of the parking lot. “It’s like a little village.” You say, offhandedly, as you follow Magenta and Teddy through the tangle of trailers. “I wish I had more time to look around.” “Here we are.” Teddy stops outside a trailer labeled //Assistant Director// and looks at you expectantly. “Oh right!” You say, brightly, just as if you had known all along that AD stood for Assistant Director. [[You reach out and knock tentatively on the door.]]

(set: $Uber_730 to true) ''Uber 7:30'' You look at your watch. You still have half an hour to get to the studio. Plenty of time, you think. When the car pulls up in your driveway, you are pleased to see that it is your favourite Uber driver, Henri. “Vanessa!” He says cheerfully. “Good morning! Where are you off to this fine morning?” “I got a job at a movie set downtown!” You squeal at him. Henri winks at you. “What! Congratulations! That’s perfect for you!” “Right?” You say, a hint of apprehension creeping into your voice. Henri looks at you and smiles his big, bright smile. “Listen. You just be tough and do your best.” He says. “You’re a talented person, Vanessa. They’ll see it, don’t you worry!” “I hope you’re right Henri.” You say, taking a deep, calming breath. First days at new jobs always make you feel anxious. Henri drops you off at the courthouse in the middle of the downtown core. “The studio is set up in that lot right across the street there.” He says, pointing at the bustling lot. “Thanks so much Henri!” You say nervously. “Good luck Kween!” He trills and honks his horn once in celebration. You cross the street to the lot. The normally empty parking lot is now overrun with portables and trailers. It does look like the set of a reality TV show, you think, as you step over the concrete parking barrier and look around. The lot is a bustle of activity. People in headphones and t-shirts scurry to and fro with their clipboards and digital tablets. Other people stand around drinking out of plain white paper cups. Someone else is fixing lights up on impossibly skinny metal poles. Now that you are here, you have no idea what you are supposed to do. You pull out your phone and reread the email. Hmmm. No mention of who you should look for. You scan the lot for any indication of where you should go and spot a small line-up in front of what looks like it might once have been a French fry hut. You stick your phone back in your bag and walk over to the line-up. A tall, black-haired goddess steps away from the hut holding a tall, steamy cup and looks you up and down appraisingly. “You here for the show?” “Yes.” You reply, a bit self-consciously. “Me too! I’m Magenta. I’m the Self-Help and Culture Consultant.” “Nice to meet you,” You manage to sputter, overawed by her presence. “I’m Vanessa Johnson, Self-Care Stylist.” You nod pleasantly at each other (due to a recently vanquished pandemic, shaking hands is out of fashion at the moment) and before the pause can turn awkward you ask: “What did you order?” Magenta closes her eyes and takes a long sip of her drink. “It’s a Tiramisu Latte with oat milk and it is the most decadent thing I have ever tasted. A real treat for a Monday morning.” “That sounds delicious!” You say, relieved that the French fry hut is actually a café. “Maybe I’ll order one too.” Magenta shakes her head and opens her mouth to speak but before she can get a word out a voice behind you says: “If you two are all set, I’ll take you to the AD’s trailer. She’s waiting for you.” You spin around. Standing behind you is a tall young man wearing plaid pants and suspenders over a grey and yellow cardigan. For a moment you are too stunned by his clothing choices to say anything. “I’m the Parking Captain, Teddy.” He reassures you. “I’m glad you’re here. We were all a bit worried when you missed the car.” “Wait.” You say. “They sent a car?” “Didn’t you get the email?” “The email I got didn’t say anything about sending a car.” You explain. “Oh, well, just so you know, from now on we’ll send a car.” Teddy tells you. “And I’ll check up on why you didn’t get an email telling you so already.” He makes a note on his clipboard and adjusts a small earpiece in his left ear. “Alexa is waiting for you.” He says. “Come with me.” “Oh, but I was just going to get a coffee.” You protest. Teddy shakes his head. “No time for that.” He says. “We try to start at 9:00 sharp.” You nod, feeling kind of disappointed and follow behind Magenta as Teddy leads you towards a cluster of trailers at the far end of the parking lot. “It’s like a little village.” You say, offhandedly, as you follow Magenta and Teddy through the tangle of trailers. “I wish I had more time to look around.” “Here we are.” Teddy stops outside a trailer labeled //Assistant Director// and looks at you expectantly. “Oh right!” You say, brightly, just as if you had known all along that AD stood for Assistant Director. [[You reach out and knock tentatively on the door.]]

''A single shot of espresso'' “That’s a very sexy drink.” Says the Barista, expertly pulling your shot. You’re startled by how forward he is, but this is your first time on a tv set. Maybe everyone is like that. You debate explaining to him that you are a lesbian and then decide he probably already knows, given that the name of the show is ''Kweens without Krowns'' and one of the casting requirements was that you identify as LGBTQ2+. You smile at him and accept the tiny white paper cup he hands you. “Thanks.” You take a deep inhale of the smokey aromatic shot and then take the tiniest sip. The espresso is at once creamy, fragrant and bitter. You let the sip roll to the back of you tongue and hold it there for a moment before swallowing, just like your favourite barista taught you. “Good?” Asks the Barista approvingly. You nod. “Wonderful.” You breathe. “Hey, if the performing gig doesn’t work out, we can always use another espresso Kween around here.” Says the Barista. You grin at him. He is fairly handsome, you reflect, noting his big brown eyes (which have obviously been accentuated with mascara and the tiniest bit of eyeliner) and buttery skin. You make a note to ask him about his skin care and make-up routine later. He might have a few tips you can use in your role as Self-Care Stylist and you need all the help you can get. “Ready?” Asks Magenta. “Sure.” You say. Magenta smiles at you. “You should probably go check in with the AD then.” She says. “Want me to show you where her trailer is?” (if: $bike_630 is true)[ [[You decide to check in before you do anything else.|Check-in bike 6:30]] [[It can’t hurt to look around a bit before you check in.|Look around bike 6:30]]](if: $Bus_630 is true)[ [[You decide to check in before you do anything else|Check-in 6:30]] [[It can't hurt to look around a bit before you check in|Look around 6:30]]](if: $Uber_630 is true)[ [[You decide to check in before you do anything else|Check-in 6:30]] [[It can't hurt to look around a bit before you check in|Look around 6:30]]]

''A medium peppermint mocha with oat milk'' “So, you here for the shoot?” The Barista asks as he prepares your mocha. “Yes. Self-Care Stylist.” You tell him, a little bit proudly. “Oh good, that’s the whole team then.” The Barista hands you the most perfect mocha you have ever seen, with a little leaf drawn in the foam on top. “So, you just need to check in with the AD over in her trailer first and then I think today is mostly concept and costuming so it should be a light day.” He tells you, casually, as though you probably already know this but just need a nudge in the right direction. “Oh, thanks.” You tell him. “See you at lunch!” He grins at you briefly and then turns his attention to the next person in line. “So, I guess we should check in with the AD then?” You say to Magenta. “Oh, I checked in when I got here.” She says. “But I’m happy to walk over with you. Unless you want to look around a bit more first.” (if: $bike_630 is true)[ [[You decide to check in before you do anything else.|Check-in bike 6:30]] [[It can’t hurt to look around a bit before you check in.|Look around bike 6:30]]](if: $Bus_630 is true)[ [[You decide to check in before you do anything else|Check-in 6:30]] [[It can't hurt to look around a bit before you check in|Look around 6:30]]](if: $Uber_630 is true)[ [[You decide to check in before you do anything else|Check-in 6:30]] [[It can't hurt to look around a bit before you check in|Look around 6:30]]]

''A large Yerba Mate tea'' “A nice solid choice for first thing in the morning.” Says the Barista. You smile at him and gratefully accept the white paper cup he hands you. “Thanks.” You say. “I have a feeling I’m going to need it.” “You here for the shoot?” He asks, leaning on the counter with an elbow and wiping casually at a drip of foam left behind by someone’s latte. “Yes. Self-Care Stylist.” You tell him, a little bit proudly. “Oh good, that’s the whole team then.” He says, straightening up and brushing his floppy, blue streaked hair off his forehead. “I think today is mostly concept and costuming so it should be a light day.” He tells you, casually, as though you probably already know this but just need a nudge in the right direction. “Oh, thanks.” You tell him. “You’ll just need to check in with the AD over in her trailer and then, I think they have you set up in the Production trailer for this morning.” You nod, trying to retain all the details. “Thanks. That’s so helpful.” You say. “My pleasure.” He says. “Good luck!” He grins at you briefly and then turns his attention to the next person in line. “So, I guess we should check in with the AD then?” You say to Magenta. “Oh, I checked in when I got here.” She says. “But I’m happy to walk over with you. Unless you want to look around a bit more first.” (if: $bike_630 is true)[ [[You decide to check in before you do anything else.|Check-in bike 6:30]] [[It can’t hurt to look around a bit before you check in.|Look around bike 6:30]]](if: $Bus_630 is true)[ [[You decide to check in before you do anything else|Check-in 6:30]] [[It can't hurt to look around a bit before you check in|Look around 6:30]]](if: $Uber_630 is true)[ [[You decide to check in before you do anything else|Check-in 6:30]] [[It can't hurt to look around a bit before you check in|Look around 6:30]]]

''You reach out and knock tentatively on the door.'' A voice from inside the trailer calls out: “It’s not locked!” Teddy pulls open the door and guides you, somewhat forcefully, inside. Magenta steps inside behind you. “Hey there. Come on in. Welcome to the set.” Sitting at a desk not far from the door is a short, stocky woman with short, light brown hair, and blue rimmed glasses. “I see you met one of your co-stars already.” You nod, shifting your weight from one foot to the other, awkwardly. “I’m Alexa.” Says the woman. “I’m the Assistant Director. If you have any questions, or any problems, I’m your gal.” “I’m Vanessa Johnson, Self-Care Stylist. I’m here to check in.” “Great.” Says Alexa, marking something off on her clipboard. “I just need you to sign these papers and then the two of you can head over to the Production trailer.” “Oh, ok, thanks.” You say awkwardly. You sign the papers and then turn to Magenta. [[“I guess we should head to production?” You say to Magenta.|Head to production]] [[You look at your watch. 9:00. Maybe there’s time to look around before a bit before you head over to Production.|9:00]]

''“I guess we should head to production?” You say to Magenta.'' You retrace your steps through the village of trailers until you reach the Production Trailer. This trailer is much bigger than the others, as though 3 or 4 normal sized trailers had melded together into one. Standing outside the Production Trailer are two women in bedroom slippers. They are drinking coffee out of brightly coloured mugs. They pause in their conversation as you and Magenta approach. “Hi.” Says Magenta immediately. “I’m Magenta. Self-Help and Culture Consultant. And this is Vanessa Johnson, Self-Care Stylist.” “Robbie Bark.” Says the shorter, red-haired one. “Design.” Your attention wanders for a moment to her bright red pants. She sees you looking and laughs. “Such a great colour right?” “I have never seen pants that colour before.” You admit. “Honey, on this show, you’re going to see all kinds of things you’ve never seen before!” You laugh nervously. What on earth does that mean? “And I’m Grey Denmark. Fashion.” Says the other woman. She is not tall, but she is so slim and elegant with short grey-black hair styled high on her head and a deep purple blazer, obviously tailored to fit. She speaks with a slightly British-sounding accent and her skin is a creamy light brown colour. “Nice to meet you both.” You say. “Shall we go in?” Says Magenta, pulling open the trailer door. “Good idea.” Says Grey. [[You follow the others inside the trailer.]]

''You look at your watch. 9:00. Maybe there’s time to look around before a bit before you head over to Production.'' You step out of the trailer and smile at Magenta. “Do you think we have time to look around a bit before we head to Production?” You ask. You really want to explore some of the lot before the day gets started. Magenta looks at her watch. “Probably not.” She says. “It’s my experience that producers and tech crew like to start as close to on time as they can.” “Oh.” You say. “Is this your first show?” Asks Magenta. “Yes.” You admit. Magenta smiles her dazzling smile at you. “You’ll love it.” She says. “Trust me. This kind of show, where you work in a team of really talented people and where the focus is on helping others, is such a fulfilling experience.” You try to look like you can relate but your stomach gives an anxious lurch. Until that moment, you totally believed that you could pull this off, even though you know nothing about being a Self-Care Stylist. But now you’re starting to worry that the people in charge of the production are going to expect you to have actual skills. Magenta touches your elbow gently. “Shall we head over to Production?” She asks. “We can take the scenic route so you can see a bit more of the lot on our way over?” You smile anxiously at her. “That sounds perfect.” You say. Magenta leads you through the village of trailers. “These are all the production trailers.” She says, pointing to a trailer labeled: Costumes and another labeled: Make-Up. “We’ll probably spend some time in both of these today. The other trailers in this part of the lot are mostly storage for extra equipment.” She says. She points to the other far corner of the lot. “Over there are the living trailers.” She says. “Some of our co-stars are from out of town, so they have living quarters set up over there to make it easier for them to do the show.” “Wow.” You say, impressed. “That’s so cool.” “It’s like a village here when it really gets going.” Agrees Magenta. “Some of the crew live in those trailers too.” “And that warehouse thing right in the middle of the lot?” You ask. “That’s where they will build the sets we will use for some of the scenes.” Says Magenta. “Although, I think most of the filming is actually done off-site. Oh, here we are: Production.” Magenta waves her arm at a trailer that is much bigger than most of the others you have seen so far. It looks as though 3 or 4 normal sized trailers have melded together into one. Standing outside the Production Trailer are two women in bedroom slippers. They are drinking coffee out of brightly coloured mugs. They pause in their conversation as you and Magenta stop outside the trailer. “Hi.” Says Magenta immediately. “I’m Magenta. Self-Help and Culture Consultant. And this is Vanessa Johnson, Self-Care Stylist.” “Robbie Bark.” Says the shorter, red-haired one. “Design.” Your attention wanders for a moment to her bright red pants. She sees you looking and laughs. “Such a great colour right?” “I have never seen pants that colour before.” You admit. “Honey, on this show, you’re going to see all kinds of things you’ve never seen before!” You laugh nervously. What on earth does that mean? “And I’m Grey Denmark. Fashion.” Says the other woman. She is not tall, but she is so slim and elegant with short grey-black hair styled high on her head and a deep purple blazer, obviously tailored to fit. She speaks with a slightly British-sounding accent and her skin is a creamy light brown colour. “Nice to meet you both.” You say. “Shall we go in?” Says Magenta, pulling open the trailer door. “Good idea.” Says Grey. [[You follow the others inside the trailer.]]

''Uber 8:30'' You really want to be on time (something you normally struggle with). Luckily, the studio is less than a 5 minute drive away. The Uber drops you off at the courthouse. “The studio is set up in that lot right across the street.” Says Henri, your favourite Uber driver. “Thanks so much Henri!” You say hastily. “Wish me luck!” “Good luck Kween!” He trills and honks his horn once in celebration. You cross the street to the lot. The normally empty parking lot is now overrun with portables and trailers. It does look like the set of a reality TV show, you think as you step over the concrete parking barrier and look around. The lot is a bustle of activity. People in headphones and t-shirts scurry to and fro with their clipboards and digital tablets. Other people stand around drinking out of plain white paper cups. Someone else is fixing lights up on impossibly skinny metal poles. You look at your watch: 9:09. Shit, you’re late! You pull out your phone and reread the email. Hmmm. No mention of who you should look for. You scan the lot for any indication of where you should go. You feel your chest tighten in panic and take a few deep breaths to calm the frantic pounding of your heart. “Excuse me.” A tall young man wearing plaid pants and suspenders over a grey and yellow cardigan hurries over to you, clutching a clipboard. “Are you Vanessa Johnson?” He asks breathlessly. “Yes.” You say, smoothing the front of your outfit and trying to look as though you know what you are doing. “Follow me.” He says and sets off across the lot at a brisk trot. You scramble to keep up. “I’m Teddy.” He says. “You’re a bit late.” He glances at you disapprovingly. “That’s never a good look on your first day.” You feel your face redden. “Sorry about that.” You mutter. “The Uber took a while to get here.” “I have a note here that the car arrived to pick you up at 8:30, waited 10 minutes and then moved on.” Says Teddy, consulting his clipboard again without slowing his pace. “Wait.” You say. “You sent a car?” “Didn’t you get the email?” “The email I got didn’t say anything about sending a car.” You explain. “Oh, well, just so you know, from now on we’ll send a car.” Teddy tells you. “Please be ready at 8:30 each morning. We start at 9:00 sharp.” You make a note to set your alarm for 6:30 tomorrow. Teddy is right. So far, you have not made a good impression. He leads you towards a cluster of trailers at the far end of the parking lot. “It’s like a little village.” You say, offhandedly. “I wish I had more time to look around.” Teddy gives you a disdainful glance but does not stop moving. “You would have if you had arrived on time. 9:00 sharp.” He taps his clipboard vigorously with his pencil. “I understand.” You say quietly. “I’m sorry.” “Here we are.” Teddy stops outside a trailer labeled //Assistant Director// and looks at you expectantly. “Oh right!” You say, brightly. Teddy sighs, rolls his eyes and [[pulls open the door.]]

''You follow the others inside the trailer.'' The inside of the trailer has been set up like a board room, but with monitors and electronic equipment trailing along the walls, a massage chair tucked into one corner and some recliners scattered about. In the centre of the large room, there are tables set up in a big rectangle and off to the side is a trolley loaded with snacks, a coffee station and some water jugs with fruit in the bottom. There are two people already seated at the table. “Hey there.” Says Grey. “We found the others. This is Magenta: Self-Help and Culture Consultant. And Vanessa, Self-Care Stylist.” You smile and nod at the women at the table who smile and nod right back at you. “And this is Kerry Mondo: Organization and Toni Waterski: Food.” “Great!” Says a voice from behind you. You glance over your shoulder and see a tall man in a graphic tee and ripped jeans stepping into the trailer. “You’re all here. Please, take a seat, oh, and feel free to help yourself to a muffin or more coffee too.” He says. You take a seat: [[Between Magenta and Kerry]] [[Between Grey and Robbie]] [[Beside Toni]]

''Between Magenta and Kerry'' You grab a banana walnut muffin from the snack cart and take a seat next to Magenta. Kerry looks over at you and gives a small smile. “Hello. You are the Self-Care Kween then?” She asks. You smile and nod. “Ever been on a show like this?” You shake your head “no”. “I have and let me tell you, compared to normal work, this is a piece of cake.” She says brightly. “Especially beauty salon and spa work. Those places get super busy and hectic.” “Oh, I don’t…” You are cut off by the man in the tee shirt. “Okay everyone! Welcome to day 1!” The other women thump their hands on the table in a rhythmic sort of clapping. Grey gives a little “whoop” of excitement. “I’m Steve McGill, your Producer and I am super excited to finally get this show off the ground! We’ve got the Green Light to go ahead but this first episode is super important. How many seasons we get initially will depend on this first episode so it’s gotta be perfect!” You all nod and murmur supportively. “We’ve got a really awesome cast and I’m sure you’re all going to work super well together. So, I think we should start with introductions and then we’re going to go straight on to the concept. So, let’s just work our way around the table. Who wants to go first.” [[Magenta’s intro]] [[Grey’s intro]] [[Robbie’s intro]] [[Kerry’s intro]] [[Toni’s intro]] [[Your intro]] [[Skip the intros]]

''Between Grey and Robbie'' You head straight over to the coffee station and pour yourself a large cup of coffee. You consider grabbing a muffin, but no one else seems to be eating and you don’t want to draw attention to yourself. You try to glide inconspicuously to a seat between Grey and Robbie. Grey turns to face you as you sit down. “That’s an interesting hair colour.” She smiles at you a bit mischievously. You run your hands through your hair and smile awkwardly. “Yeah, well, it’s hairmageddon.” You admit. “I haven’t had a chance to fix it up since the pandemic ended.” Grey nods. “Too busy with clients to look after yourself?” She asks. You nod and take a large gulp of coffee. “Something like that.” You agree. Robbie squeezes your shoulder lightly. “Don’t take Grey’s teasing seriously.” She says. “We can’t all spend 5 hours getting ready each morning.” You look more closely at Grey. She seems very put together. Her skin is perfect, smooth and even, and her outfit does not have a single wrinkle and looks like it was tailored just for her. Her hair is a sculptural masterpiece. You resist the temptation to reach out and pat it. You are suddenly self-conscious about your own look. But before you have time to think more about it, the man in the tee-shirt takes his place at the head of the tables and says: “Okay everyone! Welcome to day 1!” The other women thump their hands on the table in a rhythmic sort of clapping. Grey gives a little “whoop” of excitement. “I’m Steve McGill, your Producer and I am super excited to finally get this show off the ground! We’ve got the Green Light to go ahead but this first episode is super important. How many seasons we get initially will depend on this first episode so it’s gotta be perfect!” You all nod and murmur supportively. “We’ve got a really awesome cast and I’m sure you’re all going to work super well together. So, I think we should start with introductions and then we’re going to go straight on to the concept. So, let’s just work our way around the table. Who wants to go first.” [[Magenta’s intro]] [[Grey’s intro]] [[Robbie’s intro]] [[Kerry’s intro]] [[Toni’s intro]] [[Your intro]] [[Skip the intros]]

''Beside Toni'' You look longingly at the coffee station but no one else seems to be having anything so you take the empty seat next to Toni. Toni smiles and nods at you. “Toni Waterski, Food.” She says. “Vanessa Johnson, Self-Care Stylist.” You say, glancing again at the coffee station. “Want to get something to eat before we start?” Asks Toni. “Oh, uh, well, I’m probably good.” You sputter. Toni smiles and winks at you. “Come on.” She says. “The muffins look great.” Toni stands up and walks over to the coffee table. She seems completely comfortable in her own skin, you think, as you trail after her like a puppy. “I recommend the pumpkin pepita muffins.” Says Toni handing you a plate. You accept the plate gratefully and turn to head back to your seat. “Anyone else want a muffin?” She asks the rest of the women assembled around the table. “Ooh, do any of them have chocolate in them?” Asks Magenta. Toni laughs. “You and your sweet tooth!” She says. “But yes, I think these have Rolos in them.” She passes a muffin to Magenta. Magenta takes a big bite and grins at Toni. “Delicious?” Asks Toni. “Magenta lives off of sweets.” She adds winking at you. “Anyone else? Kerry? Robbie?” “I’m good.” Says Robbie. “Me too.” Says Kerry. “Although, this Rolo muffin smells delicious.” Toni passes her a muffin and she pretends to scowl at her. Toni takes a pumpkin muffin for herself and sits back down. The man in the tee-shirt stands up and arranges some papers on the table in front of him. “Okay everyone! Welcome to day 1!” The other women thump their hands on the table in a rhythmic sort of clapping. Grey gives a little “whoop” of excitement. “I’m Steve McGill, your Producer and I am super excited to finally get this show off the ground! We’ve got the Green Light to go ahead but this first episode is super important. How many seasons we get initially will depend on this first episode so it’s gotta be perfect!” You all nod and murmur supportively. “We’ve got a really awesome cast and I’m sure you’re all going to work super well together. So, I think we should start with introductions and then we’re going to go straight on to the concept. So, let’s just work our way around the table. Who wants to go first.” [[Magenta’s intro]] [[Grey’s intro]] [[Robbie’s intro]] [[Kerry’s intro]] [[Toni’s intro]] [[Your intro]] [[Skip the intros]]

“Found her.” He says guiding you, somewhat forcefully, inside. “Finally.” Sitting at a desk not far from the door is a short, stocky woman with short, light brown hair and blue rimmed glasses. “You’re late.” She snaps. You gulp and smile awkwardly. “Sorry.” You say again. “Slow Uber.” “I’m Alexa.” Says the woman. “I’m the Assistant Director, and we sent a car.” “Yes.” You say. “I didn’t realize…” “Doesn’t matter now.” Says Alexa. She thrusts a pile of papers at you. “Sign these and then you need to scurry over to the Production trailer. They’re waiting for you.” “Oh, ok, thanks.” You say awkwardly. You sign the papers and hand them back to Alexa. She nods brusquely and stands up. “I’ll walk you to Production.” She says. “Right. Thanks.” So far, this is not going very well. Alexa leads you at a brisk trot, back through the village of trailers to the Production Trailer. This trailer is much bigger than the others, as though 3 or 4 normal sized trailers had melded together into one. Standing outside the Production Trailer are three women. They are drinking coffee out of brightly coloured mugs. They pause in their conversation as you and Alexa stop outside the trailer. “Found her.” Says Alexa sounding more annoyed than ever. The three women look you up and down appraisingly which makes you feel like ants are crawling down your back. You resist the urge to scratch. After what seems like an eternity, the beautiful black haired goddess steps forward and nods at you (due to a recent pandemic, shaking hands is out of fashion at the moment.) “Hi.” She says. “I’m Magenta. Self-Help and Culture Consultant.” “Vanessa Johnson.” You say, smiling at her gratefully. “Self-Care Stylist.” “Robbie Bark.” Says the shorter, red-haired one. “Design.” Your attention wanders for a moment to her bright red pants. She sees you looking and laughs. “Such a great colour right?” “I have never seen pants that colour before.” You admit. “Honey, on this show, you’re going to see all kinds of things you’ve never seen before!” You laugh nervously. What on earth does that mean? “And I’m Grey Denmark. Fashion.” Says the other woman. She is not tall, but she is slim and elegant with short grey-black hair styled high on her head and a deep purple blazer, obviously tailored to fit. She speaks with a slightly British-sounding accent and her skin is a creamy light brown colour. “Nice to meet you.” You say. “Shall we go in?” Says Magenta, pulling open the trailer door. “Good idea.” Says Grey. [[You follow the others inside the trailer.]]

(set: $Bus_630 to true) ''Bus 6:30'' Luckily the bus stop is not far from your house so you don’t have to wait long for good old number 4. The bus drops you off across the street from the courthouse. The normally empty parking lot is now overrun with portables and trailers. It does look like the set of a reality TV show, you think as you step over the concrete parking barrier and look around. The lot is a bustle of activity even though it is not yet 9:00. People in headphones and t-shirts scurry to and fro with their clipboards and digital tablets. Other people are standing around drinking out of plain white paper cups. Someone else is fixing lights up on impossibly skinny metal poles. You pull out your phone and reread the email. Hmmm. No mention of who you should look for. You scan the lot for any indication of where you should go and spot a small line-up in front of what looks like it might once have been a French fry hut. You stick your phone back into your bag and walk over to the line-up. The tall black-haired goddess in front of you turns around and smiles benignly at you. “You here for the show?” “Yes.” You reply, a bit self-consciously. “Me too! I’m Magenta. I’m the Self-Help and Culture Consultant.” “Nice to meet you,” You manage to sputter, overawed by her presence. “I’m Vanessa Johnson, Self-Care Stylist.” You nod pleasantly at each other (due to a recently vanquished pandemic, shaking hands is out of fashion at the moment). Magenta orders a large tiramisu latte with extra foam and whipped cream and then steps aside to wait for you to make your order. You order: [[A single shot of espresso]] [[A medium peppermint mocha with oat milk]] [[A large Yerba Mate tea]]

''You decide to check in before you do anything else.'' Magenta gives your bike an apprehensive look. “We’re going to have to figure out where you can park that thing.” She says, helpfully. You nod and look around for a bike rack. “Here.” Says a voice behind you. “I’ll put that in the Bike Safe for you.” You turn around awkwardly, and come face to face with a tall young man wearing plaid pants and suspenders over a grey and yellow cardigan. For a moment you are too stunned by his clothing choices to say anything. “I’m the Parking Captain, Teddy.” He reassures you. “I can take the bike. And, after this, it would be better if you waited for the car to come pick you up.” “Wait.” You say. “They sent a car?” “Didn’t you get the email?” “The email I got didn’t say anything about sending a car.” You explain. “Oh, well, just so you know, from now on we’ll send a car.” Teddy tells you. “And I’ll check up on why you didn’t get an email telling you so already.” He pauses and gently puts his hand on the handlebars of your bike. “And I can take the bike for you if you like.” You smile stupidly and nod your head. “Thank you very much.” You say. Teddy nods and wheels your bike away. “Well, that was serendipitous.” Says Magenta. “This way to the AD’s trailer.” She heads confidently off towards a cluster of trailers at the far end of the parking lot. “It’s like a little village.” You say, offhandedly, as you follow Magenta through the tangle of trailers. Each one sports a little sign on its door: //Hair//, //Makeup//, //Costuming//, //''''Production''''//, //Assistant Director//. “Here we are.” Magenta stops outside the //Assistant Director// trailer and looks at you expectantly. “Oh right!” You say, brightly, just as if you had known all along that AD stood for Assistant Director. A voice from inside the trailer calls out: “It’s not locked!” You smile stupidly at Magenta, who gives you an encouraging nod, and pull open the door. “Hey there. Come on in. Welcome to the set.” Sitting at a desk not far from the door is a short, stocky woman with short, light brown hair, and blue rimmed glasses. She looks over at you and beckons impatiently. “I’m Alexa, the Assistant Director.” You step into the trailer. “I’m Vanessa Johnson. I’m here to check in.” “Great.” Says Alexa, marking something off on her clipboard. She shoves a pile of papers into your hands. “They are all ready for you in Production so, after you sign those papers, why don’t you head over there and I’ll see you in a bit on the set.” [[You smile and step back out of the trailer. “I guess we should head to production.” You say to Magenta.|Head to production]] [[You step out of the trailer and look at your watch. There are still 10 minutes before you’re due to start. It can’t hurt to look around a little bit first.|10 minutes left]]

''It can't hurt to look around a bit before you check in'' “Great!” Says Magenta, looping her arm through yours. “But first, we are going to have to figure out what to do with that.” She points to your bike. “Hmmm.” You say, looking around for a bike rack. “I’m not sure…” You start to say, not seeing any available places to park your bike. The friendly barista opens a small side door in his shack and sticks his head out. “Here.” He says, smiling brightly at you. “If you just lean it up here, I’ll make sure Teddy takes care of it.” “Teddy?” You ask. “Parking Captain.” You nod as though you understand what that means, and lean your bike up against the side of the coffee shack. “Thanks!” “My pleasure!” Trills the Barista before ducking back into the shed to continue his divine latte making. “Ok.” You say brushing of the flustered feeling that has started to build in your head. “I’m ready.” “Great!” Says Magenta. “One of my favourite things is exploring the lot before the start of a shoot. You don’t mind if I act as a tour guide do you?” “Of course not!” You say taking a sip of your drink. It is decadent and creamy with a nice hint of bitterness from the espresso. “Just remember to keep half an eye on the time.” Says Magenta. “We have to leave enough time for you to check in before we start. Producers and tech crew like to start as close to on time as they can.” “Got it!” You say. Magenta sets off through the bustling throng towards the village of trailers in the northwest corner of the lot. “Is this your first show?” Asks Magenta. “Yes.” You admit. Magenta smiles her dazzling smile at you. “You’ll love it.” She says. “Trust me. This kind of show, where you work in a team of really talented people and where the focus is on helping others, is such a fulfilling experience.” You try to look like you can relate but your stomach gives an anxious lurch. Until that moment, you totally believed that you could pull this off, even though you know nothing about being a Self-Care Stylist. But now you’re starting to worry that the people in charge of the production are going to expect you to have actual skills. Magenta touches your elbow gently. “You hungry?” She asks, motioning to a trailer with a small crowd of people mulling about outside. “That’s the canteen. That’s where we can go to grab a quick snack if we’re in a hurry. There’s also a Commissary for bigger meals and breaks” She explains. [[“I’m good with coffee for now.”]] [[“I’d love a snack!”]]

''You decide to check in before you do anything else.'' Magenta loops her arm around yours and turns towards the village of trailers spread out on the lot before you. “Hey.” Says a voice behind you. You turn around awkwardly, and come face to face with a tall young man wearing plaid pants and suspenders over a grey and yellow cardigan. For a moment you are too stunned by his clothing choices to say anything. “I’m the Parking Captain, Teddy.” He reassures you. “I’m your pre-check-in contact person.” He checks something off on his clipboard and smiles at you patronizingly. “And, after this, it would be better if you waited for the car to come pick you up.” “Wait.” You say. “They sent a car?” “Didn’t you get the email?” “The email I got didn’t say anything about sending a car.” You explain. “Oh, well, just so you know, from now on we’ll send a car.” Teddy tells you. “And I’ll check up on why you didn’t get an email telling you so already.” He checks his clipboard again. “So, you need to go to the AD’s trailer.” He says. “Which is over in the northwest corner of the lot.” He waves his arm vaguely towards the village of trailers. Magenta smiles benignly at him and gives his arm a friendly squeeze. “I know where it is.” She says. “I’ll take her.” “Right.” Says Teddy, not looking up from his clipboard. “Thank you very much.” You say awkwardly. Teddy looks up suddenly, flashes you a forced smile, and wanders off. “Well, that was weird.” Says Magenta. “This way to the AD’s trailer.” She heads confidently off towards a cluster of trailers at the far end of the parking lot. “It’s like a little village.” You say, offhandedly, as you follow Magenta through the tangle of trailers. Each one sports a little sign on its door: //Hair//, //Makeup//, //Costuming//, //Production//, //Assistant Director//. “Here we are.” Magenta stops outside the //Assistant Director// trailer and looks at you expectantly. “Oh right!” You say, brightly, just as if you had known all along that AD stood for Assistant Director. You reach out and knock tentatively on the door. A voice from inside the trailer calls out: “It’s not locked!” You smile stupidly at Magenta, who gives you an encouraging nod, and pull open the door. “Hey there. Come on in. Welcome to the set.” Sitting at a desk not far from the door is a short, stocky woman with short, light brown hair, and blue rimmed glasses. She looks over at you and beckons impatiently. “I’m Alexa, the Assistant Director.” You step into the trailer. “I’m Vanessa Johnson. I’m here to check in.” “Great.” Says Alexa, marking something off on her clipboard. She shoves a pile of papers into your hands. “They are all ready for you in Production so, after you sign those papers, why don’t you head over there and I’ll see you in a bit on the set.” [[You smile and step back out of the trailer. “I guess we should head to production.” You say to Magenta.|Head to production]] [[You step out of the trailer and look at your watch. There are still 20 minutes before you’re due to start. It can’t hurt to look around a little bit first.|20 minutes left]]

''It can't hurt to look around a bit before you check in'' “Great!” Says Magenta, looping her arm through yours. “One of my favourite things is exploring the lot before the start of a shoot. You don’t mind if I act as a tour guide do you?” “Of course not!” You say taking a sip of your drink. It is decadent and creamy with a nice hint of bitterness from the espresso. “Just remember to keep half an eye on the time.” Says Magenta. “We have to leave enough time for you to check in before we start. Producers and tech crew like to start as close to on time as they can.” “Got it!” You say. Magenta sets off through the bustling throng towards the village of trailers in the northwest corner of the lot. “Is this your first show?” Asks Magenta. “Yes.” You admit. Magenta smiles her dazzling smile at you. “You’ll love it.” She says. “Trust me. This kind of show, where you work in a team of really talented people and where the focus is on helping others, is such a fulfilling experience.” You try to look like you can relate but your stomach gives an anxious lurch. Until that moment, you totally believed that you could pull this off, even though you know nothing about being a Self-Care Stylist. But now you’re starting to worry that the people in charge of the production are going to expect you to have actual skills. Magenta touches your elbow gently. “You hungry?” She asks, motioning to a trailer with a small crowd of people mulling about outside. “That’s the canteen. That’s where we can go to grab a quick snack if we’re in a hurry. There’s also a Commissary for bigger meals and breaks” She explains. [[“I’m good with coffee for now.”]] [[“I’d love a snack!”]]

''You look at your watch. Maybe there’s time to look around before a bit before you head over to Production.'' You step out of the trailer and smile at Magenta. “Do you think we have time to look around a bit before we head to Production?” You ask. You really want to explore some of the lot before the day gets started. Magenta looks at her watch. “We’ve got about 10 minutes.” She says. “But we have to be really careful not to be late! Producers and tech crew like to start as close to on time as they can.” “Ok!” You say. “I can work with that.” “Is this your first show?” Asks Magenta. “Yes.” You admit. Magenta smiles her dazzling smile at you. “You’ll love it.” She says. “Trust me. This kind of show, where you work in a team of really talented people and where the focus is on helping others, is such a fulfilling experience.” You try to look like you can relate but your stomach gives an anxious lurch. Until that moment, you totally believed that you could pull this off, even though you know nothing about being a Self-Care Stylist. But now you’re starting to worry that the people in charge of the production are going to expect you to have actual skills. Magenta touches your elbow gently. “Come on.” She says. “Why don’t we take the scenic route over to Production and I’ll show you some more of the lot as we go?” You smile anxiously at her. “That sounds perfect.” You say. Magenta leads you through the village of trailers. “These are all the production trailers.” She says, pointing to a trailer labeled: //Costumes// and another labeled: //Make-Up//. “We’ll probably spend some time in both of these today. The other trailers in this part of the lot are mostly storage for extra equipment.” She says. “Over there are the living trailers.” She points to the other far corner of the lot. “Some of our co-stars are from out of town, so they have living quarters set up over there to make it easier for them to do the show.” “Wow.” You say, impressed. “That’s so cool.” “It’s like a village here when it really gets going.” Agrees Magenta. “Some of the crew live in those trailers too.” “And that warehouse thing right in the middle of the lot?” You ask. “That’s where they will build the sets we will use for the scenes we shoot when we are not on location.” Says Magenta. “Although, I think most of the filming is actually done off-site. Being on location adds s layer of authenticity to the show. Plus, it’s cheaper.” She adds with a wink. “Oh, here we are: Production.” Magenta waves her arm at a trailer that is much bigger than most of the others you have seen so far. It looks as though 3 or 4 normal sized trailers have melded together into one. Standing outside the Production Trailer are two women in bedroom slippers. They are drinking coffee out of brightly coloured mugs. They pause in their conversation as you and Magenta stop outside the trailer. “Hi.” Says Magenta immediately. “I’m Magenta. Self-Help and Culture Consultant. And this is Vanessa Johnson, Self-Care Stylist.” “Robbie Bark.” Says the shorter, red-haired one. “Design.” Your attention wanders for a moment to her bright red pants. She sees you looking and laughs. “Such a great colour right?” “I have never seen pants that colour before.” You admit. “Honey, on this show, you’re going to see all kinds of things you’ve never seen before!” You laugh nervously. What on earth does that mean? “And I’m Grey Denmark. Fashion.” Says the other woman. She is not tall, but she is so slim and elegant with short grey-black hair styled high on her head and a deep purple blazer, obviously tailored to fit. She speaks with a slightly British-sounding accent and her skin is a creamy light brown colour. “Nice to meet you both.” You say. “Shall we go in?” Says Magenta, pulling open the trailer door. “Good idea.” Says Grey. [[You follow the others inside the trailer.]]

''You step out of the trailer and look at your watch. There are still 20 minutes before you’re due to start. It can’t hurt to look around a little bit first'' You step out of the trailer and smile at Magenta. “Do you think we have time to look around a bit before we head to Production?” You ask. You really want to explore some of the lot before the day gets started. Magenta looks at her watch. “Sure!” Says Magenta, looping her arm through yours. “One of my favourite things is exploring the lot before the start of a shoot. You don’t mind if I act as a tour guide do you?” “Of course not!” You say taking a sip of your drink. It is decadent and creamy with a nice hint of bitterness from the espresso. Magenta sets off through the bustling throng towards the village of trailers in the northwest corner of the lot. “Is this your first show?” Asks Magenta. “Yes.” You admit. Magenta smiles her dazzling smile at you. “You’ll love it.” She says. “Trust me. This kind of show, where you work in a team of really talented people and where the focus is on helping others, is such a fulfilling experience.” You try to look like you can relate but your stomach gives an anxious lurch. Until that moment, you totally believed that you could pull this off, even though you know nothing about being a Self-Care Stylist. But now you’re starting to worry that the people in charge of the production are going to expect you to have actual skills. Magenta touches your elbow gently. “You hungry?” She asks, motioning to a trailer with a small crowd of people milling about outside. “That’s the canteen. That’s where we can go to grab a quick snack if we’re in a hurry. There’s also a Commissary for bigger meals and breaks” She explains. [[“I’m good with coffee for now.”|Coffee 2]] [[“I’d love a snack!”|Snack 2]]

''“I’m good with coffee for now.”'' “Coffee makes life possible.” Magenta agrees. ” She leads you through the village of trailers, pointing things out as you go. “These are all the production trailers.” She says, pointing to a trailer labeled: //Costumes// and another labeled: //Make-Up//. “We’ll probably spend some time in both of these today. The other trailers in this part of the lot are mostly storage for extra equipment.” She says. She points to the other far corner of the lot. “Over there are the living trailers.” She says. “Some of our co-stars are from out of town, so they have living quarters set up over there to make it easier for them to do the show.” “Wow.” You say, impressed. “That would be so much fun!” “It’s like a village here when it really gets going.” Agrees Magenta. “Some of the crew live in those trailers too. It can be quite fun to see people wandering about in their jammies. There are a lot of impromptu parties too.” She adds. “I’ve never even been camping.” You admit. “So I’m a bit envious.” Magenta winks at you. “Well, camping is fun, but this is way better.” She says. She swings you around so you are facing the middle of the lot. “That warehouse building in the middle of the lot is where they will build the sets we will use for the scenes we shoot when we are not on location.” She says. “Although, I think most of the filming is actually done off-site. Being on location adds a layer of authenticity to the show. Plus, it’s cheaper.” She adds with a wink. [[“Excuse me!”|Excuse me 2]] Says an irritated sounding voice from behind you.

''“I’d love a snack!”'' Magenta guides you gently over to the crowd in front of the canteen. “Excuse me.” You say again and again as you push your way to the front. Now that you are close, you see that the canteen is like a stepped-up food truck. The whole front wall of the trailer has been rolled up and you can see fridges and shelves filled with to-go style snacks. There’s everything from packaged burgers that can be heated in a microwave, to a salad bar, to miniature containers of ice cream and pretzels. Running the length of the back wall is a list of all the snacks that are available. You glance down the list. “What is a vegan Buffalo Chicken cone?” You ask the woman hovering helpfully off to one side, blinking your eyes rapidly to hide your surprise at her purple-silver hair and multiple eyebrow piercings. “Oh that’s delicious!” She says. “It’s vegan buffalo chicken bites, right? But in a cardboard cone. You eat it with these fun little tongs.” She grabs something off a shelf and holds it out to you. It is a pair of slim plastic purple chopsticks joined together with a hinge at the top. “The tongs are so adorable.” She says. “Plus they come in 7 different colours, which does make a difference when you’re eating, whatever my therapist says.” You nod in what you hope is a supportive way. “I’ll have that then.” You say. “Awesome!” Says the woman, doing a little leap with one foot but somehow not leaving the ground. She turns her back to you and bustles about, pushing buttons on the microwave and pouring sauce. When she turns to face you again she is holding a cream coloured paper cone with bright blue polka dots all over it. Heaped into the cone are small squarish bits coated in a bright red-orange sauce. She hands you the cone and a matching pair of chopsticks. “There you go!” She says. “Thanks.” You say as you start to turn away. “Wait!” She says, turning back to the shelves. “You also get, this.” She hands you the tiniest, cutest toothbrush you have ever seen, also in bright blue. “And this.” She passes down a small, metal container of breath mints, again, in bright blue. “You don’t want to kill anyone with your Buffalo breath.” She giggles with a wink. “Thanks.” You say. “That’s so…thorough of you.” She grins proudly. “Here at the Canteen, we Crush it!” As she says “Crush it” everyone milling about in front of the canteen joins in, loudly and in unison. You take a step back and feel your heel land on something soft and distinctly un-ashphalt-like. [[“Excuse me.”]] Says a petulant voice from behind you.

''"Excuse me"'' “Oh, so sorry.” You say as you spin around, narrowly avoiding spraying your buffalo bites all over the bystanders. “Vanessa Johnson?” Standing in front of you is a short, stocky woman with short, light brown hair, and blue rimmed glasses. Her lips are puckered as if she has just finished biting into a particularly bitter lemon and she looks you over disapprovingly as she taps impatiently at a clipboard cradled in one arm. “Yes.” You say brightly. “Alexa. Assistant Director.” Says the woman. “Nice to meet you.” You say, trying to work your way slowly out of the crowd without stepping on anyone else. Magenta waves you over to an open spot near the canteen and looks approvingly at your cone of Buffalo bites. “Oh, those are so good.” She says. She smiles at Alexa. “Hi Alexa. I see you’ve met Vanessa.” “Indeed.” Alexa says abruptly and then turns her piercing, impatient glare on you. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you!” “Oh, sorry.” You say uncertainly. “From now on.” Says Alexa with measured calm. “It’s a good idea to check in when you get here.” “Sorry.” You say again. “I thought, since I got here so early, that it wouldn’t hurt to look around.” “We were panicking when the driver didn’t find you!” Says Alexa accusingly. You feel your eyes widen in surprise. “You sent a car?” “Of course.” Says Alexa. “It was in the email we sent you.” You shake your head. “The email I got didn’t mention anything about sending a car.” You say. Alexa freezes and gives you a long, penetrating look. Then she turns to her clipboard. “Well.” She says, clearly flustered. She takes a deep, deliberate breath and closes her eyes for a moment. Magenta gives you an amused smile. “Ok, I will check what happened there.” Says Alexa, opening her eyes and making a note on her clipboard. “From now on, please wait for the car.” “I will.” You blurt abruptly, unnerved by her petulance. Alexa thrusts her clipboard at you. “I need you to sign a few things before we start.” She says. You glance over the papers quickly, without paying too much attention and sign where she indicates. She snatches her clipboard back as soon as you finish. “Right then.” She says brusquely. “The two of you need to head over to Production now. I will see you at lunch.” She flashes a brief, forced smile at you. “Good luck today!” She spins on her heel and marches purposely off towards the village of trailers. You let out a breath you were not aware you had been holding. “That was intense.” You say. You look around regretfully. “I guess I’ll have to see the rest of the lot later.” Magenta loops her arm back through yours. “I’m sure there will be plenty of time to get to know this place.” She says. “After all, it’s going to be our home away from home for at least a year, if everything goes according to plan. Which it hopefully will now that they’ve managed to get the team together.” You look at her questioningly. She gives you a “this-is-just-between-us” look. “I think they’ve had a lot of trouble building interest in this show.” She says. “I heard there was a pretty bad turn out at the auditions and they’ve struggled to find enough qualified tech staff.” Your heart does a terrified little lurch. Maybe the only reason you got the job was because of the poor turnout and not because they thought you were the best candidate. You take a deep breath and decide not to worry about it. “Just keep swimming.” You repeat silently to yourself, quoting your favourite tenacious fish. “We’d better [[head over to Production|Production 2]].” Says Magenta, glancing at her phone.

''Head over to Production'' The Production trailer is much bigger than most of the trailers you have seen so far. It looks as though 3 or 4 normal sized trailers have melded together into one. Standing outside the Production Trailer are two women in bedroom slippers. They are drinking coffee out of brightly coloured mugs. They pause in their conversation as you and Magenta stop outside the trailer. “Hi.” Says Magenta immediately. “I’m Magenta. Self-Help and Culture Consultant. And this is Vanessa Johnson, Self-Care Stylist.” “Robbie Bark.” Says the shorter, red-haired one. “Design.” Your attention wanders for a moment to her bright red pants. She sees you looking and laughs. “Such a great colour right?” “I have never seen pants that colour before.” You admit. “Honey, on this show, you’re going to see all kinds of things you’ve never seen before!” You laugh nervously. What on earth does that mean? “And I’m Grey Denmark. Fashion.” Says the other woman. She is not tall, but she is so slim and elegant with short grey-black hair styled high on her head and a deep purple blazer, obviously tailored to fit. She speaks with a slightly British-sounding accent and her skin is a creamy light brown colour. “Nice to meet you both.” You say. “Shall we go in?” Says Magenta, pulling open the trailer door. “Good idea.” Says Grey. [[You follow the others inside the trailer.]]

''"Excuse me."'' Magenta lets go of your arm and you spin around to see a short, stocky woman with short, light brown hair, and blue rimmed glasses tapping impatiently at a clipboard cradled in one arm. “Hello.” You say brightly. “Oh, hi Alexa.” Says Magenta. Alexa nods at her abruptly and then turns her piercing, impatient glare on you. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you!” She says. “Oh, sorry.” You say uncertainly. “This is Alexa.” Says Magenta. “She’s the Assistant Director. She keeps everyone in line around here.” “Nice to meet you.” You say. “From now on.” Says Alexa with measured calm. “It’s a good idea to check in when you get here.” “Sorry.” You say again. “I thought, since I got here so early, that it wouldn’t hurt to look around.” “We were panicking when the driver didn’t find you!” Says Alexa accusingly. You feel your eyes widen in surprise. “You sent a car?” “Of course.” Says Alexa. “It was in the email we sent you.” You shake your head. “The email I got didn’t mention anything about sending a car.” You say. Alexa freezes and gives you a long, penetrating look. Then she turns to her clipboard. “Well.” She says, clearly flustered. Magenta reaches out and gently touches her arm. “It’s ok, Alexa.” She says. “These mix-ups and miscommunications happen.” “There was no mix-up.” Mutters Alexa, still looking at her clipboard. “But it’s all sorted out now.” Magenta persists. “Vanessa is here, she got here in good time and with a minimum of fuss. And she knows that, from now on, the car will come to take her to the set.” “Ok.” Says Alexa, glaring at you again. “But tomorrow, wait for the car.” “I will.” You blurt abruptly, unnerved by her petulance. Alexa thrusts her clipboard at you. “I need you to sign a few things before we start.” She says. You glance over the papers quickly, without paying too much attention, and sign where she indicates. She snatches her clipboard back as soon as you finish. “Right then.” She says brusquely. “The two of you need to head over to Production now. I will see you at lunch.” She flashes a brief, forced smile at you. “Good luck today!” She spins on her heel and marches purposely off towards the village of trailers. You let out a breath you were not aware you had been holding. “That was intense.” You say. Magenta loops her arm back through yours. “Oh don’t mind her.” She says. “She’ll lighten up once we get going. Being an AD is not an easy job and Alexa hasn’t been doing it for very long. Acutally.” She adds in a quieter voice. “I think they’ve had a lot of trouble building interest in this show. I heard there was a pretty bad turn out at the auditions and they’ve struggled to find tech staff.” Your heart does a little terrified lurch. Maybe the only reason you got the job was because of the poor turnout and not because they thought you were the best candidate. You take a deep breath and decide not to worry about it. “Just keep swimming.” You repeat silently to yourself, quoting your favourite tenacious fish. “We’d better [[head over to Production|Production 2]].” Says Magenta, glancing at her phone.

''“I’m good with coffee for now.”'' “Coffee makes life possible.” Magenta agrees. ” She leads you through the village of trailers, pointing things out as you go. “These are all the production trailers.” She says, pointing to a trailer labeled: //Costumes// and another labeled: //Make-Up//. “We’ll probably spend some time in both of these today. The other trailers in this part of the lot are mostly storage for extra equipment.” She says. She points to the other far corner of the lot. “Over there are the living trailers.” She says. “Some of our co-stars are from out of town, so they have living quarters set up over there to make it easier for them to do the show.” “Wow.” You say, impressed. “That would be so much fun!” “It’s like a village here when it really gets going.” Agrees Magenta. “Some of the crew live in those trailers too. It can be quite fun to see people wandering about in their jammies. There are a lot of impromptu parties too.” She adds. “I’ve never even been camping.” You admit. “So I’m a bit envious.” Magenta winks at you. “Well, camping is fun, but this is way better.” She says. She swings you around so you are facing the middle of the lot. “That warehouse building in the middle of the lot is where they will build the sets we will use for the scenes we shoot when we are not on location.” She says. “Although, I think most of the filming is actually done off-site. Being on location adds a layer of authenticity to the show. Plus, it’s cheaper.” She adds with a wink. You glance at your watch. 8:55. “We should probably [[head over to Production now.|Production 2]]” You say. Magenta nods and swings you around. “Yes.” She agrees. “It would not do to be late on our first day!”

''“I’d love a snack!”'' Magenta guides you gently over to the crowd in front of the canteen. “Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me.” You say again and again as you push your way to the front. Now that you are close, you see that the canteen is like a stepped-up food truck. The whole front wall of the trailer has been rolled up and you can see fridges and shelves filled with to-go style snacks. There’s everything from packaged burgers that can be heated in a microwave, to a salad bar, to miniature containers of ice cream and pretzels. Running the length of the back wall is a list of all the snacks that are available. You glance down the list. “What is a vegan Buffalo Chicken cone?” You ask the woman hovering helpfully off to one side, blinking your eyes rapidly to hide your surprise at her purple-silver hair and multiple eyebrow piercings. “Oh that’s delicious!” She says. “It’s vegan buffalo chicken bites, right? But in a cardboard cone. You eat it with these fun little tongs.” She grabs something off a shelf and holds it out to you. It is a pair of slim plastic purple chopsticks joined together with a hinge at the top. “The tongs are so adorable.” She says. “Plus they come in 7 different colours, which does make a difference when you’re eating, whatever my therapist says.” You nod in what you hope is a supportive way. “I’ll have that then.” You say. “Awesome!” Says the woman, doing a little leap with one foot but somehow not leaving the ground. She turns her back to you and bustles about, pushing buttons on the microwave and pouring sauce. When she turns to face you again she is holding a cream coloured paper cone with bright blue polka dots all over it. Heaped into the cone are small squarish bits coated in a bright red-orange sauce. She hands you the cone and a matching pair of chopsticks. “There you go!” She says. “Thanks.” You say as you start to turn away. “Wait!” She says, turning back to the shelves. “You also get, this.” She hands you the tiniest, cutest toothbrush you have ever seen, also in bright blue. “And this.” She passes down a small, metal container of breath mints, again, in bright blue. “You don’t want to kill anyone with your Buffalo breath.” She giggles with a wink. “Thanks.” You say. “That’s so…thorough of you.” She grins proudly. “Here at the Canteen, we Crush it!” As she says “Crush it” everyone milling about in front of the canteen joins in, loudly and in unison. “That was an intense snack experience.” You say, when you finally clear the crowd and find Magenta again. Magenta laughs. “They try to keep it fun, you know?” She says. “But we had better hurry. It’s almost 9:00.” You look around regretfully. “I guess I’ll have to see the rest of the lot later.” Magenta loops her arm back through yours. “I’m sure there will be plenty of time to get to know this place.” She says. “After all, it’s going to be our home away from home for at least a year, if everything goes according to plan. Which it hopefully will now that they’ve managed to get the team together.” You look at her questioningly. She gives you a “this-is-just-between-us” type of look. “I think they’ve had a lot of trouble building interest in this show.” She says. “I heard there was a pretty bad turn out at the auditions and they’ve struggled to find enough qualified tech staff.” Your heart does a terrified little lurch. Maybe the only reason you got the job was because of the poor turnout and not because they thought you were the best candidate after all. You take a deep breath and decide not to worry about it. “Just keep swimming.” You repeat silently to yourself, quoting your favourite tenacious fish. “We’d better [["head over to Production.|Production 2]]” Says Magenta, glancing at her phone.

(set: $magenta_intro to true) ''Magenta’s intro'' “Magenta.” Says Steve. “Why don’t you tell us a bit about yourself.” Magenta elegantly puts her paper coffee cup down on the table and stands up. She smiles pleasantly as she looks around at the rest of you. “I started off life as a basketball player, if you can believe it.” She begins. “All my brothers played and it was in the family. And then, I broke my leg, right at the knee and that ended the idea that I could get a basketball scholarship. This was a devastating blow, you understand. Basketball is in my blood. All my siblings went to college on basketball scholarships and now, suddenly I had to pivot. I took it hard so my parents sent me to see a therapist and it was a revelation. I realized that I could help people too. So I went to school for psychology and then I opened my own private practice. It was busy, but wonderful. And then my older brother and his wife were killed in a car accident and I stepped in to take care of their kids. So, suddenly I am a single mother, working full-time at my own practice and that was hard. But it made me realize that I had sort of made a bubble around myself. I was helping some people, sure, but my reach was limited. So, I decided I would branch out and go online. I have been running my award-winning YouTube channel “I’m SO Worth It!” for 10 years now. I also blog. I do public speaking. I go into schools to educate the kids and their teachers about the importance of good mental health. So, when I got the invitation to audition for this show, I thought: “Why not?”. Maybe this is the next right step. And here I am.” “Thank you Magenta. That was a great intro.” Says Steve. “Who’s next? Or is it time to move on to [[concept development?]]” (if: $grey_intro is true)[ ~~Grey's intro~~](else:)[ [[Grey’s intro]]] (if: $robbie_intro is true)[ ~~Robbie's intro~~](else:)[ [[Robbie’s intro]]] (if: $kerry_intro is true)[ ~~Kerry's Intro~~](else:)[ [[Kerry’s intro]]] (if: $toni_intro is true)[ ~~Toni's intro~~](else:)[ [[Toni’s intro]]] [[Your intro]] [[Skip the intros]]

(set: $grey_intro to true) ''Grey’s intro'' Grey stands up and gives her jacket a quick downward tug so that it sits perfectly on her shoulders and flares ever so slightly at her waist. “My go.” She says. “My parents are from India, but I was born in Canada so there’s always been a bit of a culture clash for me, with them. Luckily, they are super supportive of me and of my career and even though they are university professors and not fashion designers, they have always encouraged me to be myself.” “What about when they found out you were gay?” Asks Robbie. “That was harder for them. They didn’t grow up in a very open-minded community in India so it took a little while for them to understand it wasn’t something they could medically fix. But now, I’m married, I have a wife and they absolutely love her! She won their hearts with food, really.” Grey winks at Toni. “So anyway, I went to Toronto to study fashion design and then to Vancouver where I started my own line. It did not sell well to begin with, so I started to just post fashion tips and little tutorials on Facebook to get people interested in fashion. That opened up so many doors for me. So now, I run my fashion line and I work as a fashion stylist for film and television and even for some red carpet looks, but at my core I believe that fashion is for the people. We all want to show off what we’ve got in the best way we can. So when I was invited to audition for this show, I thought it was the perfect chance to bring me back to my fashion roots: fashion for the people. Thank you.” There is a short round of applause for this introduction and you have to admit, it was impressive. You are starting to worry that your own introduction is going to be very anti-climactic…and possibly completely made up. “Great intro Grey.” Says Steve. “Who would like to go next? Or is it time to move on to [[concept development?]]” (if: $magenta_intro is true)[ ~~Magenta's intro~~](else:)[ [[Magenta’s intro]]] (if: $robbie_intro is true)[ ~~Robbie's intro~~](else:)[ [[Robbie’s intro]]] (if: $kerry_intro is true)[ ~~Kerry's Intro~~](else:)[ [[Kerry’s intro]]] (if: $toni_intro is true)[ ~~Toni's intro~~](else:)[ [[Toni’s intro]]] [[Your intro]] [[Skip the intros]]

(set: $robbie_intro to true) ''Robbie’s intro'' “Hi there. I’m Robbie Bark and I am an interior designer. I also design patterns for fabrics, housewares and other things.” Robbie says smoothly. “I am entirely self-taught because, growing up, my family was very poor so my parents couldn’t afford to send me to college. They had never been to college themselves and their expectations of the world were very low. We lived in Manitoba, in the middle of nowhere, for 7 years I think, when I was young, and both my parents worked as farm hands there. Then we moved to a very small town in BC and they worked as maintenance help for a golf course. They were great role models in that they believed you should appreciate every opportunity that came your way and make the most of it, but it was a struggle for them to feed us and put a roof over our heads. Like Grey’s parents, they came from a really conservative background, so when I came out, they were a bit taken aback. They didn’t know how to react at all, and there was some tension around that. So, I moved out and luckily, I got a job as a sort of apprentice with Marina Sunshine, who, as you probably know, is such a good and popular designer. She taught me so much, took me under her wing and even let me crash on her couch when I didn’t have anywhere else to stay. And slowly I learned about interior design. I’m really grateful that my parents taught me to just grab a chance when it presents itself, because that’s given me so much success. I made so many good connections through Marina Sunshine that I was eventually able to have my own brand. I think the way our house or apartment looks is a reflection of how we feel and I want people to feel strong and confident and secure, which I try to do through my brand, of course. But when the call to audition for this show came along, I saw it as another opportunity to share what I love to do while helping more people than I am able to help with my brand alone. And so here I am!” “Beautiful story.” Murmurs Grey. Robbie tilts her head playfully: “Thanks”. “Thanks for that intro Robbie. We’re so pumped to have you on our show!” Says Steve. “Plus, I love that new wallpaper you just released! I’m thinking of doing a wall of my dining room in it.” “It would look great in there.” Robbie agrees smoothly. “It’s great to get to know each other a little better. Because we are going to be spending a LOT of time with each other for the next 8 months or so. Ok, who wants to go next or is it time to move on to [[concept development?]]” (if: $grey_intro is true)[ ~~Grey's intro~~](else:)[ [[Grey’s intro]]] (if: $magenta_intro is true)[ ~~Magenta's intro~~](else:)[ [[Magenta’s intro]]] (if: $kerry_intro is true)[ ~~Kerry's Intro~~](else:)[ [[Kerry’s intro]]] (if: $toni_intro is true)[ ~~Toni's intro~~](else:)[ [[Toni’s intro]]] [[Your intro]] [[Skip the intros]]

(set: $kerry_intro to true) ''Kerry’s intro'' Kerry rises to her feet so elegantly it’s almost like she floats to a standing position. Now that she is standing, you can see that she is a very petite 5’2”. Her long, shiny black hair hangs down nearly to her waist and she keeps it off her high, arched forehead with a beautifully woven headband that looks like it might have peacocks on it. She has big, dark brown, almond-shaped eyes which she has accentuated with eye-liner. “Hello everyone, I’m Kerry. My father was a Buddhist Monk before he came to Canada to study law and my mother is a welder. They are from such different worlds but they are so good for each other!” This gets a laugh from the table. “I am an organizational maven. I love to clean and tidy and organize. And in my day job, I help people declutter their homes or offices and reorganize them so that they are beautiful and functional. I also have a book out: “//Curate Your Life//”, which contains all of my best teachings about how to manage stuff, because we all have too much stuff right? We all over consume and buy more than we need and then we become burdened with possessions. And this can take a real toll on how we feel about our lives; how happy we are. So, on this show, I’ll be working closely with each one of you, to help our “Stars” get exactly what they need, in terms of possessions and products and also to get rid of the things that might be bogging them down. It all starts with stuff, guys!” This gets another laugh from the table. “I was super excited when the studio asked me if I would be a part of this show. And I am really looking forward to working with all of you!” You are starting to think that you may have been offered the job in error. All of the other people around the table are so accomplished, so sure of themselves, so talented. You remind yourself that it was your choice to lie on your resume. Your friends tried to warn you that lying on a resume can lead to trouble but until now you had assumed this show would involve a lot of acting and not so much authenticity! You wonder if you should have studied a bit harder before starting this job. Or maybe not lied on your resume… “Thanks so much Kerry. I know that I, for one, am super excited to work with you too!” Says Steve. “I loved your book, by the way! Such a unique and interesting philosophy! Ok. Who would like to introduce themselves next, or is it time to move on to [[concept development?]]” (if: $grey_intro is true)[ ~~Grey's intro~~](else:)[ [[Grey’s intro]]] (if: $robbie_intro is true)[ ~~Robbie's intro~~](else:)[ [[Robbie’s intro]]] (if: $magenta_intro is true)[ ~~Magenta's Intro~~](else:)[ [[Magenta’s intro]]] (if: $toni_intro is true)[ ~~Toni's intro~~](else:)[ [[Toni’s intro]]] [[Your intro]] [[Skip the intros]]

(set: $toni_intro to true) ''Toni’s intro'' “I’m happy to go.” Says Toni, standing up. She is about the most average-looking person you have ever seen. Which is kind of a relief. Maybe her story will also be average and then you won’t be the only one in the room who isn’t some kind of superstar already! She has dusty blond hair, cut in a cute bob that she has tucked behind her ears, and the longest eyelashes probably in existence. She is wearing a plain white t-shirt, loosely fitted, with the words “Food, Fun, Family” written on the front in a fun cursive font and a pair of acid washed, loose fitting jeans. She looks so comfortable in her own skin that you start to relax a bit. “Hi everyone. I’m Toni Waterski and my specialty is food! I love it! All of it! Although, I don’t actually eat animals anymore. But not eating something doesn’t mean you don’t love it! It just means you maybe don’t want to die of cancer.” This seems like a shocking statement to make in an intro and you look around to see how the others are taking it, but they all seem to be nodding in agreement. Was being vegan one of the requirements for being hired? You wrack your memory but truthfully, you didn’t pay much attention on audition day and you can’t remember anyone mentioning anything about being vegan. And this morning, when you were signing your papers, you didn’t notice the word //Vegan// anywhere, but you didn’t really read them either. You are starting to feel like you are not very prepared for this job! You pay extra close attention to the rest of Toni’s intro. “My mother was a chef and she taught me how to cook when I was really young. And it seems to me that all the important things in my life have revolved around food. There are so many people out there who have not really branched out in terms of the foods they will try or feel comfortable eating or cooking that I want to make food and cooking really accessible to everyone, whether you feel you have a talent for it or not. I have a new cookbook that has just come out: “Creative Comfort Cooking” which works on this philosophy of meals you can cook in one pot. All you need to make a great meal is one pot. And the more one pot meals you can cook, the easier your menu planning becomes. And that’s the message I want to spread to the world. So, when the studio called and asked me if I would be interested in being on this show, I said: 'Of course!' It’s another way to get the word out there that cooking is meditative and healing and brings people together, and it can be easy to do. Thanks for having me!” “We’re so happy to have you with us Toni!” Says Steve. “And that was a terrific intro. Ok, who’s next or is it time to move on to [[concept development?]]” (if: $grey_intro is true)[ ~~Grey's intro~~](else:)[ [[Grey’s intro]]] (if: $robbie_intro is true)[ ~~Robbie's intro~~](else:)[ [[Robbie’s intro]]] (if: $kerry_intro is true)[ ~~Kerry's Intro~~](else:)[ [[Kerry’s intro]]] (if: $magenta_intro is true)[ ~~Magenta's intro~~](else:)[ [[Magenta’s intro]]] [[Your intro]] [[Skip the intros]]

(set: $your_intro to true) ''Your intro'' You clear your throat awkwardly and stand up. How can you spin this so they don’t discover that you are a fraud? “Well.” You say brightly. “I really don’t know what to say.” “Just tell us a little bit about your background.” Says Steve. He glances down at the papers in front of him. “It says here you’ve worked as a stylist for the last 6 years and before that you worked in theatre: hair and make-up?” You had forgotten that you had put that on your resume. You wonder if it’s worth telling them the truth, that you work as a hair washer/receptionist for a local stylist while you try to find work as a theatre actor. And that you are not particularly skilled at either. Or that the only experience you've had “doing hair” was a high school production of ''Hairspray'' where, in addition to being a background singer, you were also in charge of wig maintenance. The school ultimately lost their deposit on those wigs due to your “care.” [[You decide to tell them the truth|Truth 1]] [[You decide to run with it|Run with it]] [[Back to the intros|Intro list]]

''Skip the intros'' You are going to be working with these people almost daily for the next 8 months. You’ll get to know them on the job. You are not a fan of big introductory monologues in the first place, plus, since you basically lied to get cast on this show, it might be better if they don’t know too much about you until it’s too late to fire you! Time to move on to [[concept development|concept development?]]

''Concept development'' “Right.” Says Steve, looking through the papers in front of him. “So, now we’re going to move on to the concept. We’re going to flesh out what the show is going to look like, overall, and we’re looking for your input on it because we want this show to feel raw and personal. It’s not a scripted show at all, but it does need to have a cohesive feel. So, here’s the general outline of each episode: First, you’ll get the brief on our ''Rising Star'' for that week. Then, you’ll actually go out and meet them-we have a driver for that so that you can talk on the way. Then, you’ll meet the Star and it will be up to you to get them to give you a tour of their house. We’re looking specifically for your areas of interest, so Toni, you’re in the kitchen, Grey, the bedroom, Vanessa, the bathroom and so on. Kerry and Robbie, you guys are kind of concerned with the whole house, design and organization-wise, so you can keep it more general. Then, each of you gets either a full day or part of a full day, depending, during which time you do your part of the makeover, as it were. We’re relying on each of you to make the necessary connections in the different communities you’ll be travelling to, in order to have a sort of comfortable space to do your thing. So, for example, Toni, if there is a restaurant in the area that does something special, we’re relying on you to connect with them and cultivate a relationship so we can shoot in their space. Our AD and her minions will have gone on ahead and scouted potential partnerships, so it’s not all on you, but the relationship on camera is 100% your responsibility. Is that pretty clear so far?” There are murmurs and nodding around the table. “Ok, on set we have a sort of loft inspired living slash office space set up for you to use. It’s way cheaper for us to film on location though, so we’ll be mostly off the set for the shooting of each episode. We’re expecting each of you to put your stamp on the living space on set so that it looks like a place where you might all live and work together. And then, basically, we want to avoid disaster if possible, during the actual filming and, you know, most of you get one shot at doing your thing so it’s a good idea to plan it out first. What do you think so far? “What about budget?” Asks Grey. “Ok, good question.” Says Steve. “This is Canada, so bear that in mind, but basically, we’re taking our cues from some of the other, similar shows that are available right now on streaming sites, so the budget is pretty broad. We just want you to do your thing without worrying about it too much and I will find the money for the budget. That’s my main role really. But for at least the first 6 or so episodes, we’re covered for whatever you might need. And remember, this is Canada. Our Stars might be expecting less glamour than, say, if we were in Europe or somewhere.” More nodding. You’re starting to relax a little. Maybe you will be able to pull this off after all. “Ok.” Steve is saying again. “I’m going to hand out your itineraries now and they will direct you where to go in the lot for costuming and to customize the set. Tomorrow, we’ll introduce you to your first ''Star''! Good luck everyone!” You all stand up and start to file out of the production trailer. Steve hands you each a thick twin pocket folder on the way out. Yours is purple. You flip it open and see an itinerary with appointments and meetings every hour until 8:00pm. Your palms are sweaty and your heart starts to beat a little faster. This is really happening. How are you going to keep it together? You should really not have lied on your resume! You pause outside the trailer to take a few deep breaths and decide how to proceed. [[You’ll just have to fake it till you make it. This is too good an opportunity to blow it now!|Fake it]] [[You decide to come clean to Steve about your resume and your skills as a stylist. Better to get it over with now rather than have it blow up in the middle of the shoot.|Come clean]] [[You decide to talk it over with Magenta. She seems sympathetic and she’s a therapist. If anyone will be able to help you, it will be her.|Talk it over]]

(if: $grey_intro is true)[ ~~Grey's intro~~](else:)[ [[Grey’s intro]]] (if: $robbie_intro is true)[ ~~Robbie's intro~~](else:)[ [[Robbie’s intro]]] (if: $kerry_intro is true)[ ~~Kerry's Intro~~](else:)[ [[Kerry’s intro]]] (if: $toni_intro is true)[ ~~Toni's intro~~](else:)[ [[Toni’s intro]]] (if: $magenta_intro is true)[ ~~Magenta's intro~~](else:)[ [[Magenta’s intro]]] [[Skip the intros]]

''You decide to tell them the truth'' You look from one beautiful, talented woman to the next and feel your insides turn to sludge. “Actually.” You say. “I don’t have much experience as a self-care specialist at all.” Toni raises her eyebrows at you in surprise and Magenta furrows her brow. You take a deep breath. “The thing is.” You continue. “I’m not a stylist. Or as aesthetician. Or any kind of beauty specialist!” “What do you mean?” Says Steve, flipping through some papers on the table. “It says here, you work at Fancy and Honey’s. And I have a note here that we called to check up and they gave you a glowing reference. Specifically, they said you are great at your job and they couldn’t get by without you.” You scratch your forehead nervously. “Yes, I do work at Fancy and Honey’s” You say. “But I’m not a stylist. I’m the receptionist. And sometimes I wash hair. When it’s really busy.” This revelation is met with silence and raised eyebrows. You glance nervously at Steve, who is still flipping frantically through the pile of papers on the table. “Oh my god.” Says Steve weakly. “This is a disaster.” “I’m…I’m really sorry.” You stammer. Steve turns a fiery glare on you. “Sorry can’t fix this!” He roars. You take an involuntary step back. You’ve never been comfortable with people being angry at you but you have no one but yourself to blame for your discomfort this time. You look around the table and see disappointment, shock, disgust and curiosity. Magenta stands up and smooths out her dress. “So, you lied on your resume?” She asks quietly. “Yes.” You mutter. “Oh my god!” Says Steve again. “Why did you lie on your resume?” Magenta asks. “I just…I really need the job. And… I really think that I can do a good job if someone will just give me the chance. Even though I don’t know much about being a Self-Care Stylist right now, I’m a fast learner and I think…” “Stop talking.” Snaps Steve. “Just, stop.” “I’m sorry.” You say again, knowing that it’s over and there’s nothing you can do to fix what you have done. Steve slams his hands down on the table, grabs at his hair, turns around, looks at the ceiling and groans. “Ok, Vanessa.” Says Magenta walking calmly over to you and putting her arm around your shoulders. “I need you to go wait outside while I talk to the others, ok? Actually, go get a coffee or something, but don’t go too far. I’ll come and find you when we’ve had a chance to talk this over.” You nod numbly and let her lead you out the door. [[You decide to go to the coffee hut and get a drink to take your mind off the situation.|Coffee hut]] [[You decide to just sit down on the ground outside the trailer and wait for the wonderful people inside to pronounce your sentence.|Sit on ground]]

''You decide to run with it'' “Yes.” You say. “I’ve been doing hair since high school, in my mom’s kitchen, for extra cash, on the weekends. Then I went to theatre school and we had to take classes in hair and make-up and special effects, which is a whole other world, if you know what I mean." You clear your throat awkwardly. "And then, well, after school, you know, working in the theatre is hard, so between theatre gigs, I work at Fancy and Honey’s Ultimate Hair and Aesthetics on Dundas. It’s a pretty sweet gig. The whole spa deal. Hair, make-up, nails, aesthetics, salt room, the whole kit. I’ve learned a lot there and I’m ready to take what I know to the next level and use it to really help others.” None of this is true, of course, except the part about working at Fancy and Honey’s. You do work there. As a receptionist. You take a deep breath and sit back down. You wonder how long you will manage to keep this job before they find out you know nothing about hair or make-up or self-care in general. “Thanks very much Vanessa.” Says Steve, a little uncertainly it seems to you. “So now we’re going to move on to [[concept development.|concept development?]]”

''You decide to go to the coffee hut and get a drink to take your mind off the situation.'' You make your way absent-mindedly across the lot to the coffee hut. There is no line up now. “Hey there, what can I get for you?” Asks the Barista. He flips his blue-streaked hair out of his eyes and smiles at you kindly. “Oh, uh, a mocha please.” You say to the countertop. “Everything ok?” He asks. “Shouldn’t you be in Production?” You look up and see his big brown eyes looking down at you in concern. “It’s a long story.” You sigh and run your hands anxiously through your hair. “I’m not busy.” He says. “I’m Mitch, by the way.” Mitch hands you a paper coffee cup. You look at the drink he has made and sigh. There’s a little leaf drawn in the foam on top. Mitch opens a little door at the side of the coffee hut and steps out into the lot. “Come on.” He says. “You look like you need to sit down.” He guides you gently to a small picnic table at the side of the hut. “It’s a disaster Mitch.” You say, taking a big, satisfying sip of your mocha. “Tell me all about it.” He says. Just as you are nearing the end of your tale, Magenta appears at the side of the table. Mitch looks at her and smiles. “She’s all yours.” He says winking at her. “I know that you can work miracles but this…” “Is gonna need a miracle?” She laughs. “I know.” She turns to you. “Come on, we’re ready for you now.” You follow Magenta across the lot back to the [[Production trailer|Production 3]].

''You decide to just sit down on the ground outside the trailer and wait for the wonderful people inside to pronounce your sentence.'' You take deep, calming breaths and try to think. How can you have been so stupid! No. That’s not helpful. What can you do to fix this? That’s a better question. A range of improbable options dance across your mind. You could offer to work for free. No, then how would you live? You could somehow fast track your way to being a real Self-Care Stylist! No, it probably takes longer than one day to learn everything you would need to know to do a good job on this show, no matter how fast the track is. As you are sitting there, pondering the stupidity of what you have done, Alexa comes barreling around the side of the trailer and nearly trips over you. She lets out a small, involuntary scream and takes a few exaggerated steps backwards, thrusting her clipboard out in front of her like a shield. “What, in the name of all things chocolatey, do you think you are doing?!” She gasps. Feeling a little leap of hope at learning that she is a fellow worshipper of the noble cocoa bean, you stand up and brush yourself off. “Well, you see…” You begin. Alexa slashes her hand abruptly through the air in a motion that can only mean “Silence!” and you marvel that she is able to yell at you without even opening her mouth. Regarding you with utter loathing, she tucks her clipboard under her arm, grabs your shoulder and spins you around. Yanking open the door, she sends you stumbling back into the trailer with a single, forceful push. “Work. That’s what you are here for. To work!” She spits out at you. Steve puts a hand up in a “stop” motion and Alexa freezes. Her eyes flit from one grim face to another. “What’s…” She starts. Steve carefully puts down the papers he is holding and walks over to you. He casually inserts himself between you and Alexa. “Remember your breathing exercises.” He says to her quietly. “Why would I need to remember my breathing exercises?” She asks, looking genuinely afraid. “What’s happening?” “There’s been a bit of a…development.” Says Steve. “You’d better come in and be part of this conversation. Both of you.” You sit down as far from Alexa as you can get. With measured calm, [[Steve explains what has happened.|Alexa freaks out]]

''Steve explains what has happened.'' “What were you thinking?!” She spits out as soon as Steve is finished. You open your mouth to apologize but Magenta cuts you off. “Listen.” She says. “It is what it is and frankly, this is a pretty brave move by Vanessa. So, you can punish her or you can help her but if you choose to punish her, I’m out. That is not what this show is about.” The others murmur their agreement. Whatever she said to them while you were sitting outside seems to have convinced them that you are worth taking a chance on. Alexa rolls her eyes and sighs. “Fine.” She says testily. “And I agree, this is going to work but jeez, this is not a good way to start a new job, just saying.” “So, we’ve spoken and we all agree, you will be the ''Star'' in the first episode of Kweens without Krowns and afterwards you will officially join our team.” Says Magenta. “But you are not going to have it easy Vanessa. You have to learn a lot in a short amount of time.” You nod. “And we expect you to make the most of this opportunity.” Adds Grey. “Because you have definitely made our jobs harder.” You nod again. “Well then. Are we ready to get started?” Asks Robbie. You nod a third time, feeling worried and excited at the same time. “Right.” Says Grey. “Here’s how it’s going to work. You are going to have one session with each of us where we are going to help you develop your Self-Care style and find your areas of expertise. You are probably a lot more talented than you think you are already, so don’t worry. Anything you can’t do, or can’t learn to do in a week or two, we’ll get an “assistant” to do for you until you learn how to do it yourself. Got it?” You nod. Grey turns to Alexa. “Are we ready to start filming today?” “Yep.” Says Alexa. “That part of the schedule hasn’t changed. Everyone is to go to make-up and costuming and then meet on the set.” “Good.” Says Grey turning to look at you. “So, which session would you like to start with?” [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]

(set: $fashion_grey to true) ''Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey'' You make your way across the lot to the “Bedroom” set followed by a mobile camera operator. It’s a bit weird being filmed constantly but you try to put it out of your mind and focus. You are keenly aware that you only have one chance to fix your mistake and you don’t want to blow it. Grey is hanging things up in the closet when you walk in. You look around admiringly. The bed alone is a work of art, tall and cushy and covered with a faux fur throw. “Wow! This is a really beautiful bedroom.” You say. “Isn’t it?” Grey agrees. “Ok, let’s get right to it. What is your personal fashion style?” [[Thrift Shop Warrior]] (Unpredictable combinations are my jam!) [[Broke, Out of Work Actor]] (I wear my clothes until they disintegrate) [[Comfort before Style]] (Jeans and a sweater all the way, everyday).

(set: $therapy_mag to true) ''Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta'' “How’s it going?” Magenta asks as soon as she sees you. The mobile camera operator hovers just over your left shoulder and you try to forget that your every move is being filmed. “To be honest, it’s kind of awkward.” You tell her, glancing meaningfully at the camera operator. She pats the couch cushion beside her. “Come and sit with me.” She says. “Tell me why it’s awkward.” You shrug and sit down beside her. “Because now everyone thinks I’m a fraud.” You say quietly. “They are filming me, as a fraud.” Magenta nods. “And are you a fraud?” She asks gently. You think about this for a minute. “Honestly, I don’t think I am.” You say. “I just want my life to mean something.” “And right now, it doesn’t.” Says Magenta. “It’s so hard to get to where you want to be.” You say. “I grew up hearing about all these people who just worked hard and followed their hearts and poof, they got everything they wanted.” Magenta nods again. “It gives you a false sense that this is something that is not that hard to do.” Says Magenta. “Yeah.” You say. “But really, I’m starting to think those people are the exception. It doesn’t work that way for everyone.” “True.” Says Magenta. “But also, not everyone wants their life to mean something, the way you do. Some people are happy with just having a job that pays the bills and leaves them enough time to do the things they want to do in their free time. I think people who want their life to have a deeper meaning have it harder.” You think this over for a moment. “So, because I want my life to mean something, I have to work harder for what I want?” You ask. “Yes.” Says Magenta. “Because your end goal is this particular kind of meaningful life, I think you do. Let’s break down what you mean when you say ‘meaningful’ because that’s a broad term. What would make your life feel meaningful?” [[“I want to do something that helps other people have better lives.”]] [[“I want to be famous.”]] [[“I want to do something that I really enjoy.”]]

(set: $design_robbie to true) ''Self-Care By Design with Robbie'' You make your way through the village of trailers towards the warehouse where the sets are being built, the mobile camera man trotting along behind you like an obedient puppy. Robbie waves at you from the steps of a double trailer just beside the warehouse building. “Come on in.” She says. The trailer is completely empty, except for two camp chairs in the middle of the space. “Oh.” You say awkwardly. Robbie laughs. “I know, it’s just an empty metal shell.” She says. “But after this week, it will be our headquarters. All the scenes where the 6 of us are talking about our ''Stars'' or planning what we are going to do with the week, will be shot here. So, my job is to make it into a contemporary work/live space that’s stylish and functional.” “Wow.” You say. “That seems like a big job.” “Sit.” Says Robbie, motioning to the camp chairs. “It is a big job, but you know, every big job can be broken down into many smaller jobs and that helps make it feel manageable.” “I never thought about it like that before.” You say. “I always just panic and rush around trying to get everything done before the deadline and feeling stressed.” “Lots of people do.” Says Robbie. “But I spent some time studying Zen Buddhism before I became a designer and the best thing I learned was to just breathe and break things down into smaller parts and then, do one thing at a time. Plus, I only have to plan the design. There are lots of people who will help me realize it.” “Oh?” “Sure. When we ask for help, we usually get it.” She says. “For example, today I am asking for your help in planning the ‘living room’ space in this trailer. This is where we will gather to watch the post-transformation videos of our ''Stars'' and sometimes, we will just hang out here too.” “My help?” You yelp. “But I don’t know anything about design!” Robbie rests a hand lightly on your shoulder. “Maybe not, but with a little bit of reflection, you can tell what you like. Design is about figuring out what you like and then putting it together to make a space that feels cohesive.” “Really?” You ask. “Sure. What’s your normal design aesthetic?” Robbie asks. “What sort of pieces do you use to decorate your home, for example.” [[“I like a vintage inspired look. Most of what I have comes from thrift stores.”|Vintage look]] [[“I have a few things I love, but I don’t have an overall aesthetic.”]] [[“Hand me downs and curb side finds.”]]

(set: $organize_kerry to true) ''Inside Out with Kerry'' You find Kerry kneeling on the floor sorting through boxes in the storage warehouse. The mobile camera operator trails in behind you, flipping on a series of lights on tall metal towers as he does so. “Ah Vanessa!” Says Kerry, getting to her feet. “How are you feeling?” “A bit nervous.” You admit. “And stupid. I feel stupid.” “Don’t feel stupid.” She says. “It’s in the past. All you can do now is move forward.” You nod. “Right.” “You know, one of the things that causes people to accumulate too much stuff is not being able to let go of what no longer serves them.” She says. “We are changing every minute. Every day. When something stops working for us, we need to learn to let it go. You are holding on to the past. In the past, you lied on your resume to get a really good job that you thought you would be great at if only someone would give you the chance. Now, you have the chance. So, make the most of it.” You wonder how all these women got to be so smart. You are lucky to get to work with such a great group of people. Your heart gives a little hopeful leap. Maybe things will work out after all. “What are you doing?” You ask. “Boxes.” Says Kerry. “Every place we go, we will need these boxes. People have a hard time letting go of things. So, we put them in boxes and organize them and then, after a while, maybe they can let a whole box go. When they realize that the things in the boxes do not Ignite Happiness.” “Ignite Happiness?” You ask. Kerry nods, pushing a small pile of phone boxes out of the way with her toe. “Yes. I believe that we should only keep things that Ignite Happiness.” She says. “People often keep things that used to Ignite Happiness, or that used to have special meaning but they don’t anymore. I try to help people get to that place where they have only the things that Ignite Happiness in their life right now. We can let everything else go. It’s in the past.” You think about that for a minute. “How do you know if something ignites happiness?” You ask. “Well, if it’s a physical thing, like an item, you can hold it in your hand for a moment, focus all your attention on it, imagine never holding it in your hand again and you will feel whether or not it Ignites Happiness.” Kerry says. “Here, come with me. I’ll show you what I mean.” She leads you briskly out of the storage warehouse and around the corner and up the steps of a double trailer just beside the warehouse building. She pulls the door open and sticks her head inside. “Robbie?” She calls out. “Is it ok if we work in here for a few minutes?” Robbie appears at the door. “Sure thing.” She says and grins down at you. “Brace yourself!” She says with a wink. “Kerry is about to raise your happiness meter!” “Ignite Happiness.” Kerry says, pointedly, stepping around her into the trailer. Robbie holds the door open so you can follow. The trailer is empty and bare except for a pair of camp chairs and a small coffee table in the middle of the space. “Sit down.” Says Kerry, motioning to one of the chairs. You sit obediently. “Now.” Says Kerry. “Let me see your bag.” She holds out her hand impatiently and you reluctantly hand over your trusty bag. Kerry unzips it and dumps the entire contents onto the coffee table. You gasp, appalled! You can’t remember the last time you saw some of these things! Among the piles of crumpled receipts and balled up pages from old scripts, there is: [[A barbie shoe, a small hand saw, and a church bulletin|Barbie shoe]] [[A kazoo, a pen that looks like an octopus tentacle and a Tamagotchi|Kazoo]] [[3 stain remover pens, an origami rabbit, and some unfinished knitting|Stain pens]]

(set: $food_toni to true) ''Food for Thought with Toni'' You look around the set feeling overwhelmed. It doesn’t help that the mobile camera operator follows you around persistently. Toni waves you over. “Welcome to the Kweens Without Krowns Kitchen!” She says. “Pretty nice huh?” You nod and gaze around appreciatively at the state of the art, wall-mounted convection ovens and granite- topped kitchen island. “We have everything we need here I think.” Says Toni. “So, let’s get started.” She hands you an apron and a waffle weave hand towel. “Put the apron on and then just drape the towel over your shoulder.” She says. “And now we’re ready to start. Food is an important part of self-care. Feeding our bodies well makes us feel better physically, plus food can be really connecting and it can also be really emotional. What’s your food style? How do you use food for self-care already?” [[I’m an emotional eater]] [[I’m a very healthy eater]] [[I never thought much about it before]]

''Production trailer'' Steve is standing at the head of the table. He glowers at you as you step into the trailer. Everyone else is now sitting together along one side of the table. Magenta motions you to the opposite side of the table. “Please sit down.” She says. “And don’t worry.” She whispers. You look at her in surprise and she gives you a conspiratorial wink. You sit down and look at the 5 beautiful, talented women across the table from you. “I’m sorry…” You start to say. Steve makes a slicing motion through the air with his hand. “You don’t talk.” He snaps. “We will do the talking.” You nod and clasp your hands together on the table. “I should fire you on the spot.” Steve spits out angrily. You drop your gaze to the floor and brace yourself for whatever is to come. “However, Magenta has suggested something else. Plus, you were the only one who applied for the Self-Care Stylist position.” He says. “We did not get a good turn-out at the auditions.” He mutters this more to himself than to you. He takes a long, shaky breath to compose himself and you feel your heart accelerate in a hopeful gallop. Maybe you aren’t going to get fired after all! “We’ve been looking for a way to bring this team together and get our viewers on board.” Steve continues. “We have some stiff competition and anything coming out of Canada has to fight for its rightful spot in the viewing line-up, and this might be just the thing. A black sheep story. So Canadian really. So, you will be our first Star. These fine people sitting across from you will share their time and wisdom with you in the hope…no the belief that you can become more than you are in this moment. Congratulations. You lucked out today. If Magenta had not spoken up for you, you would be finished on this set. So don’t blow it, Johnson. Because this is the only chance you’re gonna get.” You mouth drops open in shock. “I…I don’t understand.” You manage to sputter. Magenta reaches across the table and places her hand on top of yours. “We’ve spoken and we all agree, the first episode of Kweens without Krowns will have you as the ''Star'' and afterwards you will officially join our team.” She says. “But it’s not going to be easy Vanessa. You have to learn a lot in a short amount of time.” You nod disbelievingly. “And we expect you to make the most of this opportunity.” Adds Grey. “Because you have definitely made our jobs harder.” You nod again. Your heart rate starts to slow to a more normal pace. “Well then. Are we ready to get started?” Asks Robbie. “Ready.” You gulp, feeling worried and excited at the same time. “Right.” Says Grey. “Here’s how it’s going to work. You are going to have one session with each of us where we are going to help you develop your Self-Care style and find your areas of expertise. You are probably a lot more talented than you think you are already, so don’t worry. Anything you can’t do, or can’t learn to do in a week or two, we’ll get an “assistant”, a professional in the community, to do for you until you learn how to do it yourself. Got it?” You nod. Grey turns to Steve. “Are we ready to start filming today?” “Yes.” Says Steve. “And we can’t afford to waste time.” “Good.” Says Grey turning to look at you. “So, which session would you like to start with?” [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]

''You’ll just have to fake it till you make it. This is too good an opportunity to blow it now!'' Magenta looks at you in concern. “Are you ok?” She asks. “You don’t look very well.” The other women stop and turn to look at you as well. You look from one beautiful, talented woman to the next and feel your insides turn to sludge. “Sorry, yes.” You stammer. “Just low blood sugar I think.” Toni nods and looks at her watch. “Idea.” She says. She pulls open the door to the Production Trailer and sticks her head inside. “Steve!” She calls out. There is a quick, muffled conversation and then Toni turns back to the group. “Snack time!” She says, grinning. “Steve says we should all bond for 20 minutes or so, so let’s head over to the Commissary.” You nod weakly and try to take some inconspicuous calming breaths. “This way.” Says Toni, leading the group through the maze of trailers. “I popped in earlier to check it out.” The Commissary is busier than you expect. Toni leads you around the long tables in the centre of the room to a smaller, round table in the back corner. “Ok.” She says briskly. “Do you Kweens trust me to pick out some food for everyone.” There is a chorus of murmured agreement and Toni strides off to find an appropriate selection of snacks. You slouch down in your chair and try to control the mad pounding of your heart. As the conversation bubbles up around you, you reach into your bag for a tissue and your hand brushes the folded magazine pages you stuffed in there this morning. You smile wryly at the thought of your misguided optimism and then slowly pull out the papers and try to unfold them inconspicuously under the table. “So Vanessa.” Says Magenta. “What are you most looking forward to on this show?” You look up in surprise and the papers fall from your fingers. “Oh.” You say adjusting your posture. You rest your arms on the table and lean forward as you try, unsuccessfully to reach the fallen papers with your foot. “I think having free reign over product and styling choices is pretty exciting.” You say, pasting a pleasant smile onto your face. “The freedom to just do your thing is one of the best parts of doing this show.” Agrees Grey. You stretch your toes a little farther to try to snag the papers but just end up pushing them further away. Grey furrows her brow at you and then peeks under the table. She reaches down and picks up the papers. “Are you trying to get these?” She asks, holding them out to you. “Oh, yes, they must have fallen out of my bag.” You stammer. Grey starts to hand them across the table to you but catches sight of the titles and stops. She reads them and snorts a laugh. “What on earth…” She starts and then dissolves into laughter and passes the pages to Magenta. Magenta glances at them and grins. “These look like they came out of one of those discount drug store magazines.” She says, handing the pages to you. You smile and try to laugh but it comes out sounding more like a croak. “Oh those are the worst!” Says Kerry chuckling. “I remember reading an article in one of those magazines once when I was a teenager. I think the magazine was called ''Tantalize'' or something. Anyway, it advised washing your face with a cotton ball soaked in peroxide for perfect skin. I bought the wrong peroxide and nearly burned my face off! Worse than the pimples I was trying to get rid of!” The other women around the table nod and laugh in agreement and you surreptitiously slip the pages back into your bag. Toni arrives at that moment carrying a tray laden with snacks. “Oh good! Food!” You say brightly, grabbing at a toasty bagel bun with cheese and pear slices. You take a huge bite and chew vigourously. The other women watch you with looks ranging from amusement to concern. “Blood sugar.” You croak through a second huge mouthful. You swallow the bite half whole and smile weakly. “That’s better.” “Vanessa, what’s going on with you?” Asks Magenta calmly, putting her hand on yours. You look around the table. [[“Just nervous, I guess.”]] [[“Nothing!”]] [[“Like I said before, low blood sugar.”|Low blood sugar]]

''You decide to come clean to Steve about your resume and your skills as a stylist. Better to get it over with now rather than have it blow up in the middle of the shoot.'' Magenta looks at you in concern. “Are you ok?” She asks. “You don’t look very well.” The other women stop and turn to look at you as well. You look from one beautiful, talented woman to the next and feel your insides turn to sludge. “Actually.” You say. “I don’t have much experience as a self-care specialist at all.” Toni raises her eyebrows at you in surprise and Magenta furrows her brow. You take a deep breath. “The thing is.” You continue. “I’m not a stylist. Or as aesthetician. Or any kind of beauty specialist at all!” There is a moment of absolute silence during which you look from face to face for some kind of clue as to what is about to happen. “Shit.” Says Toni. “This is not good.” “Not good at all.” Says Grey. “Ok everyone. Back inside the trailer.” Says Magenta, pulling open the door and making “move along” motions with her hand. Grey, Toni, Kerry, and Robbie file back into the trailer and sit down in grim silence. Magenta motions for you to follow them. “Best to face it head on.” She says, guiding you gently through the door with a hand on your back. “What’s going on?” Says Steve in confusion. “Is there a problem?” “Brace yourself Steve.” Says Grey. “Because this is big.” Steve looks from one grim face to another in deep concern. “She’s not a stylist.” Kerry says simply. “Not a stylist. Not a specialist.” “What do you mean?” Says Steve, flipping through some papers on the table. “It says here, you work at Fancy and Honey’s. And I have a note here that we called to check up on that reference and they gave you a glowing report. Specifically, they said you are great at your job and they couldn’t get by without you.” You scratch your forehead nervously. “Yes, I do work at Fancy and Honey’s” You say, shifting from one foot to the other. “But I’m not a stylist. I’m the receptionist. And sometimes I wash hair. When it’s really busy.” This revelation is met with silence and raised eyebrows. You glance nervously at Steve, who is still flipping frantically through the pile of papers on the table. “Oh my god.” Says Steve weakly. “This is a disaster.” “I’m…I’m really sorry.” You stammer. Steve turns a fiery glare on you. “Sorry can’t fix this!” He roars. You take an involuntary step back. You’ve never been comfortable with people being angry at you. You look around the table and see disappointment, shock, disgust and curiosity. Magenta stands up and smooths out her dress. “So, you lied on your resume?” She asks quietly. “Yes.” You mutter. “Oh my god!” Says Steve again. “Why did you lie on your resume?” Magenta asks. “I just…I really need the job. And… I really think that I can do a good job if someone will just give me the chance. Even though I don’t know much about being a Self-Care Stylist right now, I’m a fast learner and I think…” “Stop talking.” Snaps Steve. “Just, stop.” “I’m sorry.” You say again, knowing that it’s over and there’s nothing you can do to fix what you have done. Steve slams his hands down on the table, grabs at his hair, turns around, looks at the ceiling and groans. “Ok, Vanessa.” Says Magenta walking calmly over to you and putting her arm around your shoulder. “I need you to go wait outside while I talk to the others, ok? Actually, go get a coffee or something, but don’t go too far. I’ll come and find you when we’ve had a chance to talk this over.” You nod numbly and let her lead you out the door. [[You decide to go to the coffee hut and get a drink to take your mind off the situation.|Coffee hut]] [[You decide to just sit down on the ground outside the trailer and wait for the wonderful people inside to pronounce your sentence.|Sit on ground]]

''You decide to talk it over with Magenta. She seems sympathetic and she’s a therapist. If anyone will be able to help you, it will be her.'' You reach out and gently grab Magenta’s arm as she steps out of the trailer. “Hey, sorry.” You stammer. “Could I talk to you for a minute?” “Sure thing, Kween.” She says. “Let me just look at my itinerary here.” She flips open her folder and glances down at the first page. “I’m due in Costuming first, where are you supposed to be?” “Also Costuming.” “Good, let’s chat while we walk over there.” She says linking her arm through yours in a very friendly way. “Ok.” You say quietly, wondering how this beautiful, successful person is going to react to a fraud like you. “So, what’s going on?” She asks as you set out slowly along the path through the village of trailers towards the Costume Trailer. “Well, the thing is…I’m just going to tell you straight ok? The thing is, I’m not a stylist. Or as aesthetician. Or any kind of beauty specialist at all!” “Oh? What are you then?” Magenta asks, so calmly that for a moment you wonder if what you have done might not be so bad after all. “I’m an out of work actor. Theatre actor. Not a very successful one actually. I was literally the bottom of my class in college.” You look up at her, embarrassed. She smiles at you very earnestly and again, you immediately feel better. “So why have you been hired as a stylist then?” She asks. “I lied on my resume.” You say, bluntly. “I do work at Fancy and Honey’s. I’m their receptionist. And, I do sometimes wash the hair for the customers. But I’ve never cut or styled hair, or done anyone’s nails but my own and I know exactly nothing about make-up. Like, I mean, nothing!” Magenta slows down a little bit and looks down at you with what you think is sympathy and you hope is not pity. “Why did you lie on your resume?” She asks. “I really need a job. I really want to work in the entertainment industry. And… I really think I can be more than I am. I don’t want to be a failure forever. Plus, I really just wanted to get an audition.” You know it probably doesn’t make sense to someone so together and successful and you suddenly feel stupid for thinking that this beautiful woman would be able to help you. “So, what are your options here?” She asks. You shrug. “I guess I can try to pull of some kind of stylist-savant type miracle.” You say hesitantly. “Or I could come clean to Steve and probably get fired.” Magenta nods and then turns thoughtful. “I can think of a third choice.” She says. “Whenever we have a hard decision to make, it’s always a good idea to try to think of three real choices. I think I might have your third choice.” “What is it?” You ask, not daring to hope. “We could make you our first project. Our first ''Star''.” You are so stunned by this suggestion that you stop walking for a moment. “Do you…do you think Steve would go for that?” Magenta smiles at you. “I think he might. That is, after all, what this show is all about, at its core.” You think about it for a moment. “I will support you in whatever you decide to do.” Magenta says gently. You nod and make your choice: [[You decide to tell Steve the truth|Steve truth]] [[You decide that you are just going to wing it and see what happens. You are smart and resourceful. You can do this.|Wing it]] [[You decide you are going to agree to Magenta’s plan to make you the first project. It might even be fun rather than mortifying.|Agree with Magenta]]

''“Just nervous, I guess.”'' Magenta nods. “Well, that’s understandable, since it’s your first show. But we’ve been here literally for hours. This seems like more than just nerves to me.” Robbie nods. “We’re a team.” Adds Robbie. “If something’s wrong, we want to help.” There is murmured agreement all around the table. You look at the kind, curious, compassionate faces smiling and nodding at you around the table and decide: [[To come clean|Come clean 2]] [[To keep on faking it|Faking it 1]]

''“Nothing!”'' Magenta nods. “That seems unlikely, given how wound up you are.” She says, staring at you pointedly. Robbie nods. “I agree.” She says. “You are clearly panicking about something.” “Whatever it is, we’re a team.” Says Grey. “We can help.” There is murmured agreement all around the table. You look at the kind, curious, compassionate faces smiling and nodding at you around the table and decide: [[To come clean|Come clean 2]] [[To keep on faking it|Faking it 1]]

''“Like I said before, low blood sugar.”'' Magenta shakes her head. “I’ve seen low blood sugar before.” She says. “This doesn’t seem like it’s caused by low blood sugar. What’s going on?” “We’re a team.” Adds Robbie. “If something’s wrong, we want to help.” There is murmured agreement all around the table. You look at the kind, curious, compassionate faces smiling and nodding at you around the table and decide: [[To come clean|Come clean 2]] [[To keep on faking it|Faking it 1]]

''You decide to come clean'' You look from one beautiful, talented woman to the next and feel your insides turn to sludge. You take a deep breath. “The thing is.” You say. “I’m not a stylist. Or as aesthetician. Or any kind of beauty specialist at all!” There is a moment of absolute silence during which you look from face to face for some kind of clue as to what is about to happen. “Shit.” Says Toni. “This is not good.” “Not good at all.” Says Grey. There is a long, stunned silence. “This is not what I was expecting you to say.” Says Magenta. “But, I firmly believe there is a solution to every problem and I think I have the solution to this one.” “Oh my god Kween!” Says Robbie. “You do?!” “Yes.” Says Magenta. “But first, could someone go and get Steve. I think it would be better if we were all here for this.” Toni stands up and strides briskly out of the Commissary. “I’m sorry…” You start. “I’m sure you are.” Says Magenta. “But right now, sorry isn’t helpful.” You nod and take another nibble of your bun just to fill the space. “Kween.” Says Robbie. “This had better be a killer idea because otherwise, we’re all screwed.” Magenta nods at her. “I’m almost positive it is.” She says with a wink. “Oh here’s Toni and Steve.” Toni sits grimly down at the table but Steve remains standing, shifting from one foot to the other impatiently. “Ok. What’s going on?” He says. “Toni says there’s a problem?” “Brace yourself Steve.” Says Grey. “Because this is big.” She pulls out a chair and motions for him to sit down. Steve sits, slowly, and looks from one grim face to another in deep concern. “She’s not a stylist.” Kerry says simply. “Not a stylist. Not a specialist.” “What do you mean?” Says Steve, pulling out his phone and opening an app. “It says here, you work at Fancy and Honey’s.” You scratch your forehead nervously. “Yes, I do work at Fancy and Honey’s.” You say, hesitantly. “But I’m not a stylist. I’m the receptionist. And sometimes I wash hair. When it’s really busy.” This revelation is met with silence and raised eyebrows. You glance nervously at Steve, who is still scrolling frantically through his phone. “Oh my god.” He says weakly. “This is a disaster.” You look around the table and see disappointment, shock, curiosity and surprisingly, sympathy. Magenta stands up and smooths out her dress. “Listen Steve.” She says firmly. “I agree this is a disaster. But, I also believe every problem has a solution. And I think I have one. A really good one.” Steve drops his head into his hands and groans. “Oh my God.” He says again. “Just listen to me for a minute.” She insists. Steve throws his hands up in the air in a gesture of hopelessness. “What have I got to lose.” He says to the ceiling. “Here’s what I think we should do.” Says Magenta. “I think we should make her our first ''Rising Star''.” She pauses and looks around the table. The other women nod slowly. “She gets a session with each one of us and we teach her how to be a Self-Care Stylist. Then she joins the team. Anything she can’t do right away, like cut and style hair, we get an ‘assistant’ to do. Someone from the community maybe.” Steve opens his mouth to protest but Magenta pushes on. “It’s exactly what this show is about.” She says. “Plus, it’s a way to bring the team together and hook the audience. Helping Vanessa makes her a real person, not a super star. It makes the rest of us into real people; just normal people who decided we could use our skills to help others. It makes us much more relatable to the audience and to the people we will be helping. What we have achieved becomes attainable for anyone. That’s a powerful message.” Steve opens his mouth to protest again but Magenta cuts him off. “Think about it for a minute Steve.” She says, forcefully. “Before you say anything else, take a minute, and think about what I’m proposing.” Steve takes a deep breath and nods. You glance around the table and see the other women nodding and smiling as they process what Magenta has just proposed. Steve closes his eyes and takes several deep, deliberate breaths. “I hate to say it.” He says at last. “And I’m really not happy with you.” He jabs a finger in your direction. “But I have to admit, it’s a good idea. We HAVE been looking for a way to bring the team together and get our viewers on board. And this is Canada. We like a homespun success story. So I admit, this could work. But you had better not blow this chance.” He says directing a piercing glare at you. “Because this is the only one you’re gonna get.” You smile weakly and open your mouth to thank him but he cuts you off. “I don’t think I want to hear anything you have to say right now.” He says, getting abruptly to his feet. “I have to go tell Alexa what’s happened. I can just imagine how she’s going to react. I’ll leave you Kweens to figure out the details.” Magenta gives him a supportive squeeze on the arm. “Good luck.” She says. Steve stares at her wryly and storms out of the Commissary. “Ok.” Says Grey. “Now that that’s all sorted out, are we ready to get this party started?” There is a chorus of enthusiastic ‘yesses’ around the table. Grey looks at you intently. “I’ll do my best to make this worth it for all of you.” You say. “Great.” Says Grey. “Which session would you like to start with?” [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]

''You decide to keep on faking it'' “I’m just not as experienced or talented as you guys are.” You say sheepishly. “I’m worried I’m going to be the loose wheel here. I’m worried about bringing the show down.” Magenta nods and looks at you with such genuine caring that you almost feel like just telling her the truth. “We’ve all felt like that at one time or another.” She says. “But don’t worry. We’re all here to help and if you don’t feel like you have enough experience in something, we can find someone to assist you with that.” “Yeah.” Says Robbie. “I’m entirely self-taught. I didn’t even finish high school and there were lots of times when I was just starting out when I had to ask other people for help with something I didn’t know how to do. That’s ok. That’s how we learn.” You feel your anxiousness dissolve and you decide: [[To tell them the truth|Come clean 2]] [[To keep on faking it|Faking it 2]]

''You decide to keep on faking it.'' “Thanks.” You say smiling brightly. “That makes me feel way better.” “Great!” Says Toni. “I. Love. Teamwork!” “So, if everyone’s had enough to eat, we should try to catch up to our schedules.” Says Grey, pushing back her chair and standing up. “Where are you going first, Vanessa?” Magenta asks you. You open your folder and look at your itinerary. “I’m in Costumes.” You say. She smiles. “Me too! Let’s walk over together.” “We’ll catch up with you Kweens later!” Says Grey. “I’m due for the Product Tour with Toni.” “And we’re off to dress the set.” Says Robbie. “Ok!” Says Magenta. “Good luck Kweens! See you later!” As the group disperses, Magenta links her arm through yours and steers you out of the Commissary. “Costumes are this way.” She says, leading you through the cluster of trailers. You nod and glance down at your itinerary. After Costumes is something called Product Tour. Maybe between them you can find a computer and do some research. Surely Google can guide you through this. You just have to be clever about it. ‘You can do this Vanessa.’ You say to yourself. ‘Just stay calm and act like you know what you are doing.' You and Magenta walk silently across the lot to the Costume Trailer, where you are met by a tall, bald man in a bright polka dot shirt with an oversized Peter Pan collar, a pair of black jeans and bright blue Cowboy boots with silver scrolling all over them. “Excellent.” He says when he sees you. “I’m Ben and I will be your Costume-ista today.” You grin in spite of the anxiety pressing relentlessly against your ribcage. He ushers you in to the trailer and seats you in a bright orange, velvet armchair. Magenta is seated just as ceremoniously, in a deep aubergine, corduroy armchair. You look around curiously. The trailer is a big, open concept, space with a small sitting area in the centre and a tiny kitchen off to one side, separated from the sitting area by a beautiful granite topped island. The back wall is covered in a leafy print wall paper and the remaining walls are a deep blue colour. The floor looks like it was made out of individual wooden rounds cut from the trunk of a tree. “So.” Says Ben briskly once you are settled. “Really, on a show like this, your look is up to you. We just want to make sure that what you wear can be shown on MeshFlix. I mean, it is the internet, but still, nothing too revealing. Political is ok as long as it’s not offensive, because this is Canada and we don’t like to ruffle each other’s feathers too much. But, you know, also be yourself.” You nod, uncertainly. “If you need us to curate a look for you or find you any pieces, we can do that. We can probably even pay for the pieces.” Ben continues. “But mostly, we expect you to be in charge of your costume.” “So, we have a costume department…” Magenta says, spreading her arms open to indicate the trailer, which, you notice, is distinctly lacking any type of clothing rack, or dressing room, or shelves or anything that would identify it as a Costume trailer. “We had a budget for the actual trailer, which, as you can see is fan. Tast. Tic.” Says Ben. “Not so much for costumes for the cast. And we don’t want you to look like we’ve dressed you, because we want to show your individuality. We want it to look authentic. And the best way to do that, is to keep it actually authentic, if you know what I mean.” “So, what do we do in here?” Asks Magenta. Ben flops dramatically down onto a blue and white checkered faux suede arm chair opposite you. “I’ve tried to create a little oasis here for anyone who needs a break, or a warm drink that doesn’t come from snooty barista Mitch out there, or a heart to heart or a place to take a nap. You know, a safe space for whatever you need.” Says Ben. “Snooty barista?” You say, completely missing the point. Ben springs forward in his chair and points a finger at you. “Ye-es.” He says. “Sa-noot-ty.” He nods and flops back against the back rest, exhausted. Magenta stands up and smooths down her skirt. “Right.” She says. “Thank you, Ben, for that enlightening conversation. I’m off to the Production trailer for the Product Tour. You coming Vanessa?” [[“Yes. Thanks for your help Ben.” You say.|Ben helps 2]] [[“Actually, I think I might stay and talk to Ben a bit longer.”|Stay with Ben 2]]

''“Actually, I think I might stay and talk to Ben a bit longer.”'' “Okay.” Says Magenta, standing up. “I’ll see you at the Product Tour.” You nod and watch her step out of the trailer and walk away. You turn to Ben desperately. “Do you have a computer I can use in this oasis?” You ask. Ben looks surprised, then pleased, then suspicious. “Of course, Kween!” He says, standing up and smoothing out his shirt. “But what’s this about? What’s going on? I have a nose that can sniff out a mystery from a kilometer away.” You smile benignly and shake your head. “Oh, no, it’s nothing at all.” You say. “I just promised work that I would send in my final hours and I forgot to do that this morning.” Ben strides to the kitchen as though he’s on the fashion runway in Paris, and returns a moment later with a sleek silver laptop. “Work?” He says, putting the laptop on the table in front of you. “Yes, you know, what I did before I got hired here.” You say, avoiding his gaze and opening the computer. “And what did you do before you got hired here?” Ben says meaningfully. “I worked at Fancy and Honey’s.” You say without looking up. You navigate to the search bar and type in: 'best beauty products 2021'. You quickly open the first 5 hits in different tabs and then change the search to: 'learn the basics of cutting hair in no time.' You open the first 5 hits of that search in separate tabs as well. When you look up again, Ben is staring at you with such intensity that it makes you feel instantly anxious and sweaty. Like you are about to be attacked by a panther. “I knew I recognized you.” He says as soon as he has your attention. You raise your eyebrows in surprise. “Oh?” You say, surreptitiously scrolling through a list of beauty products recommended by someone at the New York Times. Ben leans all the way forward in his chair and rests his chin on the edge of the laptop. It’s such a funny image that you can’t help but laugh. Ben leaps to his feet and points at you imperiously. “You are the receptionist!” He shouts. “I knew I recognized you!” “Shhhh!” You say desperately. “Listen. I can explain.” “Oh. No. You. Can’t.” Says Ben. “Because there is no explanation for this, except for one, which I have already guessed.” You close the laptop, resigned. “Ok Ben.” You say, raising your hands in surrender. “You have lied and cheated your way onto this set.” Says Ben, collapsing back into the armchair. He looks thoughtful for a second and then smiles brightly at you. “Which, I must say, is a ballsy move. I would not have thought you could be ballsy. You’re always 'Have a nice day.' And 'Your cut looks great!' and 'that colour looks so good on you.'” “That’s my job, Ben.” You say defensively, forgetting for a moment that he has caught you in the biggest lie you have ever told. “Sure honey.” He says kindly. “It is your job, but it is not ballsy! And what you have done here is ball-sy. Stupid, but ballsy.” “I know.” You say gloomily. Ben reaches over and gives your hand a pat. “Does anyone else know?” He asks. “Or is it just me?” You sigh. “No, it’s just you.” You say. Ben claps his hands giddily. “Oh honey.” He says. “I know you are an actor and all, but there is no act you can put on that can get you out of this one. There is just no way to fake being able to cut and style hair and do make-up. It’s an art honey. It takes years to learn.” You drop your head into your hands. “I know.” You mutter through your fingers. “This whole thing was such a stupid idea.” Ben stands up and glides around the table to the purple corduroy chair. He scoots the chair closer to you until the armrests are touching and sits back down. “But you have come to the right man.” He says. “Oh yes, you have.” You look up to see him looking intensely at you. “What do you mean Ben?” “Oh honey! I am a stylist!” He says. “I can cut, colour, style, layer, balayage, beehive and fade with the best of them. Plus, beauty is my religion! Look at this skin! Look at these lashes, hunn-ey! Gorgeous!” Ben fans his face with his hands as you peer at his skin. It is remarkably smooth and uniform and his lashes are long, dark and thick. You nod. “I see.” You say. “So, why weren’t you hired?” Ben gives you a disappointed look. “Oh right.” You say. “I forgot. But really Ben, you’d be perfect for this job.” “I know!” He says. “So I have a proposition to make.” “Let’s have it!” You say, far too enthusiastically. “You tell them that you need an assistant.” Says Ben. “And you pick me. Then, I do all the grunt work. I cut the hair and style the hair and do the make-up and pick the products. But we make it look like you are the one making all the decisions. You remain the expert and I get to do what I love. It’s a double win honey!” [[“Oh my god!” You say, clutching his hand. “It just might work.”|It just might work 2]]

''You decide to tell Magenta the truth'' You stop walking and bend over, pressing your palms into your thighs. You take big gulps of air. “Oh my gosh!” Says Magenta. “What’s wrong.” “I think I’m going to pass out.” You gasp. Magenta guides you to a nearby doorstep and gently lowers you down. “Don’t you think it’s time to tell me what’s really going on?” She says. You nod and try to calm the panicked buzzing of your thoughts. “The thing is…” You say, and then stop to calm your breathing. “The thing is, I’m not a stylist. Or as aesthetician. Or any kind of beauty specialist at all.” You can’t bear to look at Magenta so you stare at your feet instead. “Oh? What are you then?” Magenta asks, so calmly that for a moment you wonder if what you have done might not be so bad after all. “I’m an out of work actor. Theatre actor. Not a very successful one actually.” You look up at her, embarrassed. She smiles at you very earnestly and you immediately feel better. “So why have you been hired as a stylist then?” She asks, sitting next to you on the step. “I lied on my resume.” You say, bluntly. “I do work at Fancy and Honey’s. I’m their receptionist. And, I do sometimes wash the hair for the customers. But I’ve never cut or styled hair, or done anyone’s nails but my own and I know exactly nothing about make-up. Like, I mean, nothing!” Magenta looks at you with what you think is sympathy and you hope is not pity. “Why did you lie on your resume?” She asks. “I really need a job. I really want to work in the entertainment industry. And… I really think I can be more than I am. I don’t want to be a failure forever.” You know it probably doesn’t make sense to someone so together and successful and you suddenly feel stupid for thinking that this beautiful woman would be able to help you. “So, what are your options here?” She asks. You shrug. “I guess I can try to pull of some kind of stylist-savant type miracle.” You say hesitantly. “Or I could come clean to Steve and probably get fired.” Magenta nods and then turns thoughtful. “I can think of a third choice.” She says. “You can?” You ask, incredulous. Magenta nods. “We could make you our first project. Our first ''Rising Star''.” You are so stunned by this suggestion that you nearly tumble off the step. “Do you…do you think Steve would go for that?” You ask. Magenta smiles at you. “I think he might. At its core, that is what this show is all about.” She says simply. You think about it for a moment. “I think I could live with that.” You say, hope rising once again in your chest. Magenta puts her arm around your shoulders and gives you a comforting squeeze. “Great!” She says. “Do you want me to tell him? Or would you like to tell him?” [[“I want you to tell him.”]] [[“I’ll tell him.”]]

''You take a deep breath and shake it off. You can’t give up now!'' “That does sound like fun.” You say, trying to sound enthusiastic. Magenta pulls open the door of the Production Trailer and gently guides you inside. The whole team is there, sitting around the table, examining swatches of paint, catalogues of clothes, pictures of furniture and cook books. Steve looks up and smiles as you come in. “There you guys are!” He says. “I thought Ben had taken you hostage!” Magenta laughs good naturedly and takes a seat beside Grey. Robbie stands up and motions to the chair next to her. “Here Vanessa.” She says. “All your stuff is laid out over here.” You slide gratefully into your seat and glance at the tabletop in front of you. Arranged in neat little piles and bunches are containers of moisturizer, facial cleansers, conditioners, eye masks, clarifying face masks and an array of make-up products you have never seen before. You pick up what looks like a pair of tongs a dentist might use and turn it over in the air in front of you. Piled off to one side are hairstyling catalogues, tester bottles and tubes of hair dyes, processing liquids, bleaches and brushes. “Wow.” You say weakly. “So much to choose from.” “Isn’t it fantastic!” Says Grey enthusiastically. “I can’t wait to support some local clothing stores as well.” “Vanessa.” Says Steve. “There is also a list over there somewhere, of all the smaller, ecologically friendly personal care products companies, waste-free companies, and organic companies. We’re really committed to supporting local on this show, after the nightmare that was the pandemic!” Steve adds meaningfully. “Right.” You say. “That sounds perfect.” Steve pulls out his ipad and opens up an app. “Ok.” He says. “I’m going to tell you about our ''Star''.” Everyone leans forward eagerly. “Erin is a young single mom who works as a receptionist at a busy physiotherapy centre. In addition to regular physiotherapy they offer a range of other therapeutic services such as massage therapy, Tens pain therapy, water physiotherapy, and ultrasounds. Erin is in charge of booking appointments, managing accounts and helping to maintain equipment. She is also the primary person in charge of the client experience.” “She sounds terrific.” Says Grey. Steve nods. “Erin works long hours taking care of others at the physiotherapy clinic and then she rushes home to collect her kids from the school bus, help them with their homework, cook dinner, do the laundry and all the other things a single mom has to do to keep a home running.” “That’s intense.” You say. “I can’t imagine trying to hold all that together.” “Erin’s husband died in an ice fishing accident 4 years ago and she has been trying to do it all by herself ever since. She has three kids, aged 4, 6 and 8. Erin has been nominated by her in-laws who live in a city three hours away and wish they could do more to help. Right now Erin and her kids live in Erin’s family home, a large farmhouse in perpetual need of repair, 20 minutes from London. Erin’s in-laws are worried that the house is too much for her and that she is not taking care of herself. Specifically, she has no time for self-care and they are worried that her mental health is suffering as a result of having to manage everything alone.” Kerry looks at you and nods encouragingly. “So, the things you do for her will be especially important.” She says. You feel your head start to buzz with the familiar beginnings of a panic attack. Shit! You think. I am totally going to let this young mum down and ruin the show for everyone. Then I will be promptly fired and no one will hire me ever again. You can feel yourself starting to hyperventilate. You need to do something about this! You look up and see everyone looking at you in concern. You decide to: [[Resign|Resign 3]] [[Tell them the truth|Truth 2]]

''It just might work '' Ben gives a squeal of excitement and then clamps a hand over his mouth. “Sorry.” He says, grinning at you. “I should try to stay calm.” You nod and take a deep breath. “Ok.” You say uncertainly. “Well, we should probably get to the Product Tour. Everyone will wonder what’s happened…” You trail off as it dawns on you what you are about to pull off and the unlikely chances that you will succeed. But Ben seems excited, so you follow him out of the Costume Trailer and along the well-worn path to Production. Ben knocks lightly on the door and then pulls it open without waiting for an answer from inside. You follow him into the trailer. The whole team is there, sitting around the table, examining swatches of paint, catalogues of clothes, pictures of furniture and cook books. “Ben!” Says Steve in surprise. “Stevie.” Says Ben, smiling coyly at him. “And I’ve brought my good friend Vanessa with me.” Steve looks at you darkly. “Vanessa.” He says. “You’re late for the Product Tour.” “Uh, yes, well…” You stammer. “We got a bit delayed in Costuming.” Ben comes to your rescue. With utter confidence, he strides over to the table and sits down next to Grey. Steve looks puzzled. “What are you doing Ben?” He asks. “Ask Vanessa.” Says Ben. “I’m just her assistant.” Steve narrows his eyes at you and you feel your determination dissolve. “What does he mean, he’s your assistant?” He asks. You swallow hard and apply the smile you use when dealing with particularly bothersome clients at the salon. “Well Steve…” You begin shakily. “Being a Self-Care Stylist is a big job. It encompasses physical self-care, like hairstyling, skin care, make-up, nail care and all of those things we can see. But it also includes care of the ‘self’. You know, motivation, habits, making good choices in terms of food or work or responsibilities to others…” You trail off. Steve raises his eyebrows at you and nods. “And…” He prompts. You gulp again and adjust your smile. “Well, I was thinking about it and I decided I needed an assistant to help take care of some of the…run of the mill tasks, so I can focus on the larger ones.” You glance at all the puzzled stares around the table and instantly regret everything you have ever done. “Shit.” You mutter under your breath. Steve narrows his eyes at you and then looks over at Ben. “What’s really going on?” He says. Ben smiles brightly and shrugs his shoulders in a 'don’t ask me, I don’t know’ gesture. “Ben!” He says sharply. “All right Kween.” He says, patting the air with his hands in what you assume is meant to be a calming gesture. “But it’s not up to me to tell you. It’s up to Vanessa.” There is a long, awkward silence. You swallow twice to try to get rid of the lump in your throat and decide to: [[Resign|Resign 2]] [[Tell them the truth|Truth Ben]]

''Resign'' You stand up slowly. “Listen everyone.” You say. “I have something to tell you.” Steve puts his iPad down and looks at you, worried. “I have to leave the show.” You blurt in a breathless rush. You glance around the table and see the others staring at you, eyes wide with shock. Steve sets down his iPad carefully. “I’m sorry, what?” He says. You take a deep breath. “I don’t think I can continue with the show.” You say. “I’m sorry for wasting your time. I hope you find the perfect person to be the Self-Care Stylist, but I don’t think it’s me.” Steve stares at you for a minute, stunned. “I don’t understand what is happening here.” He says. Grey stands up smoothly and adjusts her hair with a flick of her head. “I think it’s obvious Steve.” She says. “Vanessa is quitting the show.” “But why?!” Wails Steve. “Good question.” Says Grey turning to look at you. “Why are you quitting the show?” [[You decide to get this over with as quickly as you can.|Get it over with]] [[You decide to tell them the truth.|Truth Resign]]

''Tell them the truth'' “The truth is I’m not a stylist. Or as aesthetician. Or any kind of beauty specialist at all! I’m just an out of work actor looking for a break.” You say. Toni raises her eyebrows at you in surprise and Grey stares at you intently. “What do you mean?” Says Steve, flipping through some papers on the table. “It says here, you work at Fancy and Honey’s. And I have a note here they gave you a glowing reference. They said you are great at your job and they couldn’t get by without you.” You scratch your forehead nervously. “Yes, I do work at Fancy and Honey’s” You say. “But I’m not a stylist. I’m the receptionist. And sometimes I wash hair. When it’s really busy.” This revelation is met with silence and raised eyebrows except for Ben, who looks positively thrilled. Steve raises his eyebrows and Ben tries, without success, to put on a more neutral expression. “You knew about this?” He asks. Ben shrugs. “So she’s a receptionist.” He says. “That doesn’t mean she can’t also be a great Self-Care Stylist. You started your career as a party tent delivery man and now look at you!” He says calmly. “Oh my god.” Says Steve weakly. “This is a disaster.” “I’m…I’m really sorry.” You stammer. Steve turns a fiery glare on you. “Sorry can’t fix this!” He roars. You take an involuntary step back. You’ve never been comfortable with people being angry at you but you have no one but yourself to blame for your discomfort this time. You look around the table and see disappointment, shock and curiosity. Magenta stands up and smooths out her dress. “Listen Steve.” She says firmly. “I agree this is a disaster. But, I also believe every problem has a solution. And I think I have one. A really good one.” Steve drops his head into his hands and groans. “Oh my God.” He says again. “Just listen to me for a minute.” She insists. Steve throws his hands up in the air in a gesture of hopelessness. “What have I got to lose.” He says to the ceiling. “Great!” Says Magenta. “Ok, here’s what I think we should do. We make her our first ''Rising Star''.” Says Magenta simply. “She gets a session with each one of us and we turn her from sow’s ear to silk purse. Then she joins the team.” Steve opens his mouth to protest but Magenta pushes on. “It’s exactly what this show is about.” She says. “Plus, it’s a way to bring the team together and hook the audience. Helping Vanessa makes her a real person, not a super star, it makes the rest of us into real people; just normal people who decided we could use our skills to help others. It makes us much more relatable to the audience and to the people we will be helping. What we have achieved becomes attainable for anyone. That’s a powerful message.” Steve opens his mouth to protest again but Magenta cuts him off. “Think about it for a minute Steve.” She says, forcefully. “Before you say anything else, take a minute, and think about what I’m proposing.” Steve takes a deep breath and nods. You glance around the table and see the other women nodding and smiling as they process what Magenta has just said. Steve closes his eyes and takes several deep, deliberate breaths. “I hate to say it.” He says at last. “And I’m really not happy with you.” He jabs a finger in your direction. “But I have to admit, it’s a good idea. We HAVE been looking for a way to bring the team together and get our viewers on board. And this is Canada. We like a homespun success story. So I admit, this could work. But jeez, they do not pay me enough to put out this kind of fire.” Magenta nods sympathetically. Steve looks at the women gathered around the table for a moment. “Ok.” He says. “We’ll do it.” Magenta claps her hands together lightly. “But you had better not blow this chance.” Steve says sternly, directing a piercing glare at you. “Because this is the only one you’re gonna get.” You smile weakly and open your mouth to thank him but he cuts you off. “Now get out of my trailer!” He shouts slamming his fist down on the table. You jump and scramble for the door. Magenta smiles at the other women at the table. “Come on.” She says. “You too Ben. We have work to do.” [[Outside the Production Trailer]]

''Outside the Production Trailer'' “Back to the Commissary everyone.” Says Toni. “This situation calls for warm drinks and a baked good.” You trail along behind the group as they weave their way through the tangle of trailers along the now well-worn path to the Commissary. “That was some fast thinking in there.” Says Grey pulling out a chair for you at the round table in the back corner. Magenta smiles. You collapse into the chair and look around. No one looks angry or like they are about to yell at you and you feel your heart slow to a more normal pace. Ben sits down next to you and fans his face with his hands. “So close.” He whispers, closing his eyes and leaning his head back. “I was so close.” You pat him sympathetically on the shoulder. Toni arrives with a tray laden with steaming mugs of coffee and a plate heaped with chocolate croissants. “Here, eat.” She says. Everyone takes a mug and a pastry. “I’m so sorry about this you guys…” You say. Magenta cuts you off. “There’s no point in more apologizing.” She says kindly. “You can’t change the past, but you can make the most of this opportunity.” “And, in fact, we expect you to make the most of this opportunity.” Adds Grey sternly. “Because you have definitely made our jobs harder.” You nod. Ben gives your shoulder a little supportive pat. “It’s not going to be easy, Vanessa.” Says Robbie. “You have a lot to learn in a short amount of time. But we’ve all been in tough situations where we have made decisions we weren’t proud of, so we are going to do our best to help you weather this one.” “So, are we ready to get started?” Asks Toni. You nod, feeling worried and excited at the same time. “Right.” Says Grey. “Here’s how it’s going to work. You are going to have one session with each of us where we are going to help you develop your Self-Care style and find your areas of expertise. You are probably a lot more talented than you think you are already. We’re going to use that. Anything you can’t do, or can’t learn to do in a week or two, we’ll get an “assistant” to do for you until you learn how to do it yourself. And I propose that we make Ben that assistant.” Ben lets out a sharp squeal of delight and leaps to his feet! “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!” He shouts, hopping up and down and clapping his hands together. Grey grins at him. “You didn’t think we’d forget about you did you?” She asks. Ben nods his head while continuing to hop up and down. “I did!” He says. “I really did!” “So.” Says Grey. “Are we ready to get this party started?” There is a chorus of enthusiastic ‘yesses’ around the table. Grey looks at you intently. Ben stops celebrating and bends over to give you a hug. “You got this Kween!” He whispers. “Embrace it!” You smile. “I’ll do my best to make this worth it for all of you.” You say. “Great.” Says Grey. “Which session would you like to start with?” [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]

''“I want you to tell him.”'' “Okay then.” Says Magenta, standing up. “Why don’t you go for a walk, get a coffee and try to calm down. I’ll come find you when we’re ready for you.” You nod numbly and watch her walk away. [[You decide to go to the coffee hut and get a drink to take your mind off the situation.|Coffee hut]] [[You decide to go just sit down on the ground outside the trailer and wait for the wonderful people inside to pronounce your sentence.|Sit on ground]] [[You decide to go back to the Costume Trailer and talk to Ben. He did say it was an oasis after all.|Back to Ben]]

''“I’ll tell him.”'' “Okay then.” Says Magenta, standing up and pulling you to your feet. “It’s best to get these things over with quickly.” You follow her through the cluster of trailers to the Production Trailer. Magenta pulls open the door and gently guides you inside. The whole team is there, sitting around the table, examining swatches of paint, catalogues of clothes, pictures of furniture and cook books. Steve looks up and smiles as you come in. “There you guys are!” He says. “I thought Ben had taken you hostage!” Magenta smiles at him pointedly. “What’s up?” He asks, puzzled. Magenta ushes you forward gently. “Vanessa has something to say to you all.” She says firmly. You clear your throat. “The thing is.” You say. “I’m not a stylist. Or as aesthetician. Or any kind of beauty specialist at all. I’m just an out of work actor looking for a break.” There is a moment of absolute silence during which you look from face to face for some kind of clue as to what is about to happen. “Shit.” Says Toni. “This is not good.” “Not good at all.” Says Grey. “Wait. How is that possible?” Says Steve, flipping through some papers on the table. “It says here, you work at Fancy and Honey’s. And I have a note here that they said you are great at your job and they couldn’t get by without you.” You wipe your forehead nervously. “Yes, I do work at Fancy and Honey’s.” You say, shifting from one foot to the other. “But I’m not a stylist. I’m the receptionist. And sometimes I wash hair. When it’s really busy.” This revelation is met with silence and raised eyebrows. You glance nervously at Steve, who is still flipping frantically through the pile of papers on the table. “Oh my god.” Says Steve weakly. “This is a disaster.” “I’m…I’m really sorry.” You stammer. Steve turns a fiery glare on you. “Sorry can’t fix this!” He roars. You take an involuntary step back and glance at the women seated around the table. They look back at you in disappointment, shock and curiosity. “Ok, it is pretty bad.” Says Magenta. “But I have an idea that I think will solve all our problems at once.” She turns to look at you. “Vanessa? I need you to go wait outside while I talk to the others.” She says firmly. “Go for a walk, go get a coffee, breathe. I’ll come and find you when we’ve had a chance to talk this over.” You nod numbly and let her lead you out the door. [[You decide to go to the coffee hut and get a drink to take your mind off the situation.|Coffee hut]] [[You decide to go just sit down on the ground outside the trailer and wait for the wonderful people inside to pronounce your sentence.|Sit on ground]] [[You decide to go back to the Costume Trailer and talk to Ben. He did say it was an oasis after all.|Back to Ben]]

''You decide to go back to the Costume Trailer and talk to Ben. He did say it was an oasis after all.'' You speed walk back to the Costume Trailer and burst through the door. Ben is sitting in the purple chair with his feet up on the table, a tall frosted glass with a long silicone straw in his hand. He looks up with interest as you charge in. “I knew it!” He says. “This nose can sniff out a mystery from a kilometer away and I just knew there was something you were hiding!” You flop down in the chair next to him. “It’s a disaster.” You admit. Ben sits up and puts his glass on the table. “Hold on.” He says. “Extemporaneous confessions are better with chocolate.” He scampers into the kitchen and returns a second later with a small, crystal bowl filled with chocolate covered almonds. He places the bowl on the table in front of you. “Ok. Now. What. Have. You. Done?” The fact that Ben doesn’t seem to take anything too seriously instantly makes you feel better. You briefly explain the terrible thing you have done. When you have finished, Ben claps his hands together gleefully. “Oh that’s ballsy!” He says. “Lying and cheating your way onto the show!” “Stupid, is what it is.” You correct him. He nods and tosses a couple of almonds into his mouth. “So, now what do we do?” He asks. You shrug. “Magenta is trying to negotiate a new idea.” You say. Ben waves his hand at you impatiently. “Never mind Magenta!” He says. “I have the idea that will save the day!” “Oh?” You say, marveling how everyone but you is able to think of a way out of this mess. “Here’s what you do.” Says Ben. “You tell them that you need an assistant. And you pick me. Then, I do all the grunt work. I cut the hair, I style the hair, I do the make-up and pick the products. But we make it look like you are the one making all the decisions. You remain the expert and I get to do what I love. It’s a double win honey!” “Wait?” You say. “You can cut and style hair and do make-up?” Ben looks offended. “Oh honey! I am a stylist!” He says. “I can cut, colour, style, layer, balayage, beehive and fade with the best of them. Plus, beauty is my religion! Look at this skin! Look at these lashes, hunn-ey! Gorgeous!” Ben fans his face with his hands as you peer at his skin. It is remarkably smooth and uniform and his lashes are long, dark and thick. You nod. “I see.” You say. “So, why weren’t you hired?” Ben gives you a disappointed look. “Oh right.” You say. “I forgot. But really Ben, you’d be perfect for this job.” “I know!” He says. He takes a long sip of his drink. “So? What do you think?” He asks. You smile at him. “I think it’s a great idea.” You say. “But it’s not up to me. I told you, Magenta…” “Oh Mag. Ent. Ta!” Says Ben pertly, as Magenta pulls open the door to the trailer and steps inside. “Yes?” She asks pointedly. Ben fans himself with his hands. “You guys are going back to Production?” He asks. “I’m coming with you. This is my big chance!” He springs to his feet and bolts out the door. Magenta gives you a perturbed look. “If you have done anything to make this worse Vanessa…” You shake your head. “I didn’t do anything!” You protest. “And I don’t think it’s worse. At least, I hope not.” As you walk to the [[Production Trailer|Production 4]] you tell Magenta about your conversation with Ben.

''Tell them the truth'' You stand up slowly and smooth the front of your top. “What’s the matter?” Asks Steve. You take a deep breath. “The truth is, I don’t have much experience as a Self-Care specialist at all.” You say slowly. Toni raises her eyebrows at you in surprise and Grey stares at you intently. “Actually.” You continue. “I’m not a stylist. Or as aesthetician. Or any kind of beauty specialist! And I really know next to nothing about all of those things.” “But, if you’re not a Self-Care specialist, then what are you?” Steve asks, perplexed. “I’m an out of work actor looking for a break.” “What?” Says Steve, obviously having some trouble following. He grabs a folder from a pile in front of him and frantically spreads the papers out on the table. “Here it is!” He says, brandishing your resume in the air. “It says here that you work at Fancy and Honey’s. And I have a note here that we called to talk to the manager and she gave you a glowing reference. It says here, quote: ‘She is great at her job and we could not get by without her.’” You scratch your forehead nervously and place your palms on the table to steady yourself. “Yes, I do work at Fancy and Honey’s.” You say. “But I’m not a stylist. I’m the receptionist. And sometimes I wash hair. When it’s really busy.” This revelation is met with silence and raised eyebrows. “Oh my god.” Says Steve weakly. “This is a disaster.” “I’m…I’m really sorry.” You stammer. Steve turns a fiery glare on you. “Sorry can’t fix this!” He roars. You take an involuntary step back, as though you’ve been slapped. Magenta stands up very calmly and smooths out her dress. “Listen Steve.” She says firmly. “I agree this is a disaster. But, I also believe every problem has a solution. And I think I have one. A really good one.” Steve drops his head into his hands and groans. “Oh my God.” He says again. “Just listen to me for a minute.” She insists. Steve throws his hands up in the air in a gesture of hopelessness. “What have I got to lose.” He says to the ceiling. “Great!” Says Magenta. “Ok, here’s what I think we should do. We make her our first ''Rising Star''.” Says Magenta simply. “She gets a session with each one of us and we turn her from sow’s ear to silk purse. Then she joins the team.” Steve opens his mouth to protest but Magenta pushes on. “It’s exactly what this show is about.” She says. “Plus, it’s a way to bring the team together and hook the audience. Helping Vanessa makes her a real person, not a super star. It makes the rest of us into real people; just normal people who decided we could use our skills to help others. It makes us much more relatable to the audience and to the people we will be helping. What we have achieved becomes attainable for anyone. That’s a powerful message.” Steve opens his mouth to protest again but Magenta cuts him off. “Think about it for a minute Steve.” She says, forcefully. “Before you say anything else, take a minute, and think about what I’m proposing.” Steve takes a deep breath and nods. You glance around the table and see the other women nodding and smiling as they process what Magenta has just said. Steve closes his eyes and takes several deep, deliberate breaths. “I hate to say it.” He says at last. “And I’m really not happy with you.” He jabs a finger in your direction. “But I have to admit, it’s a good idea. We HAVE been looking for a way to bring the team together and get our viewers on board. And this is Canada. We like a homespun success story. So I admit, this could work. But jeez, they do not pay me enough to put out this kind of fire.” Magenta nods sympathetically. Steve looks at the women gathered around the table for a moment. “Ok.” He says. “We’ll do it.” Magenta claps her hands together lightly. “But you had better not blow this chance.” Steve says sternly, directing a piercing glare at you. “Because it's the only one you’re gonna get.” You smile weakly and open your mouth to thank him but he cuts you off. “Now get out of my trailer!” He shouts slamming his fist down on the table. You jump and scramble for the door. Magenta smiles at the other women at the table. “Come on.” She says. “We have work to do.” [[Outside the Production Trailer|Outside Production 2]]

''You decide to get this over with as quickly as you can.'' “It’s just more than I can handle right now.” You say, trying to avoid looking anyone in the eye. “I’m really sorry.” You step around your chair and walk towards the trailer door. Grey gets there first. “Hang on a second.” She says. “I think you owe us more of an explanation than that.” [[You decide to tell them the truth.|Truth Resign]] [[You decide to cut your losses and run]]

''You decide to tell them the truth.'' “Ok.” You say, bracing yourself for the backlash that is sure to follow. “The truth is, I’m not a stylist. Or as aesthetician. Or any kind of beauty specialist! And I really know next to nothing about all of those things.” “But, if you’re not a self-care specialist, then what are you?” Steve asks, perplexed. “I’m an out of work actor looking for a break.” “What?” Says Steve, obviously having some trouble following. He grabs a folder from a pile in front of him and frantically spreads the papers out on the table. “Here it is!” He says, brandishing your resume in the air. “It says here that you work at Fancy and Honey’s. And I have a note here that we called to talk to the manager and she gave you a glowing reference. It says here, quote: ‘She is great at her job and we could not get by without her.’” You scratch your forehead nervously and place your palms on the table to steady yourself. “Yes, I do work at Fancy and Honey’s.” You say. “But I’m not a stylist. I’m the receptionist. And sometimes I wash hair. When it’s really busy.” This revelation is met with silence and raised eyebrows. “Oh my god.” Says Steve weakly. “This is a disaster.” “I’m…I’m really sorry.” You stammer. Steve turns a fiery glare on you. “Sorry can’t fix this!” He roars. You take an involuntary step back, as though you’ve been slapped. Magenta stands up very calmly and smooths out her dress. “Listen Steve.” She says firmly. “I agree this is a disaster. But, I also believe every problem has a solution. And I think I have one. A really good one.” Steve drops his head into his hands and groans. “Oh my God.” He says again. “Just listen to me for a minute.” She insists. Steve throws his hands up in the air in a gesture of hopelessness. “What have I got to lose.” He says to the ceiling. “Great!” Says Magenta. “Ok, here’s what I think we should do. We make her our first Rising Star.” Says Magenta simply. “She gets a session with each one of us and we turn her from sow’s ear to silk purse. Then she joins the team.” Steve opens his mouth to protest but Magenta pushes on. “It’s exactly what this show is about.” She says. “Plus, it’s a way to bring the team together and hook the audience. Helping Vanessa makes her a real person, not a super star, it makes the rest of us into real people, just normal people who decided we could use our skills to help others. It makes us much more relatable to the audience and to the people we will be helping. What we have achieved becomes attainable for anyone. That’s a powerful message.” Steve opens his mouth to protest again but Magenta cuts him off. “Think about it for a minute Steve.” She says, forcefully. “Before you say anything else, take a minute, and think about what I’m proposing.” Steve takes a deep breath and nods. You glance around the table and see the other women nodding and smiling as they process what Magenta has just proposed. Steve closes his eyes and takes several deep, deliberate breaths. “I hate to say it.” He says at last. “And I’m really not happy with you.” He jabs a finger in your direction. “But I have to admit, it’s a good idea. We HAVE been looking for a way to bring the team together and get our viewers on board. And this is Canada. We like a homespun success story. So I admit, this could work. But jeez, they do not pay me enough to put out this kind of fire.” Magenta nods sympathetically. Steve looks at the women gathered around the table for a moment. “Ok.” He says. “We’ll do it.” Magenta claps her hands together lightly. “But you had better not blow this chance.” Steve says sternly, directing a piercing glare at you. “Because this is the only chance you’re gonna get.” You smile weakly and open your mouth to thank him but he cuts you off. “Now get out of my trailer!” He shouts slamming his fist down on the table. You jump and scramble for the door. Magenta smiles at the other women at the table. “Come on.” She says. “We have work to do.” [[Outside the Production Trailer]]

''You decide to cut your losses and run'' "I’m so sorry.” You say again. “I can’t explain and I don’t want to make this worse. But please believe me when I tell you that you are better off without me.” Magenta stands up and comes over to where you are standing. “Is this because you think you don’t have enough experience?” She asks. “Something like that.” You mutter. “But we will help you!” She says. “Come on.” Says Toni, joining the crowd at the door. “You’re part of the team and we haven’t even started yet. You can’t give up on us now!” You look around at the beautiful, friendly, talented women in the room and: [[Decide to tell them the truth.|Truth Resign]] [[Decide that you just can’t face it.|Can't face it]]

''Decide that you just can’t face it.'' “I just don’t think I have it in me.” You say weakly. “I have so much respect and admiration for you all and I’m sorry to be letting everyone down. But, I just can’t go through with this.” Magenta sighs. “I’m really sorry to hear that Vanessa.” She says. “I hope it doesn’t hurt your chances to do what you want in the future.” Grey shakes her head and walks slowly back to the table. Toni looks at you sternly. “I think this is the wrong decision.” She says. “There’s a solution to every problem but running away is not a solution.” [[You decide to tell them the truth|Truth Resign]] [[You decide to leave]]

''You decide to leave'' You shake your head sadly. “Sorry.” You say again. You pull open the door of the trailer and step outside. You look up at the sky for a long moment and then take the long winding path through the village of trailers to the edge of the parking lot. You step over the parking barrier and head home. It’s a nice day for a walk. End [[Credits]]

''You decide to tell Steve the truth'' Magenta squeezes your arm supportively. “Come on. I’ll go with you. I’m sure we can turn this into a win.” She says. You take a deep breath and mentally try to prepare yourself to be fired, which, you reflect, is the only possible outcome this decision can have. Steve is pouring over the papers he has spread out across the tables in the Production Trailer. He looks up when Magenta opens the door. “Hi there.” He says. “Is everything ok? Aren’t you two supposed to be in Costuming right now?” “Steve, sweetie.” Says Magenta in her silky, calm way. “Sit down for a minute. We need to talk to you.” Steve’s smile freezes momentarily and his eyes flit back and forth between you and Magenta, but she pats his arm reassuringly and he sits down in his chair and looks at her expectantly. Magenta turns to you. “You’re up.” She says. “Make it count.” “I..I…the thing is.” You stammer. “Oh god.” Says Steve. Magenta takes a seat next to him and pats his hand. “Wait for her to explain.” She says. “I’m not a stylist. Or an aesthetician. Or any kind of Self-Care Specialist.” You blurt out. Steve looks stunned. Then he rifles through the papers on his desk. “But.” He sputters in disbelief. “It says here, you work at Fancy and Honey’s. And I have a note here that we called to check up on that reference and they gave you a glowing report. Specifically, they said you are great at your job and they couldn’t get by without you.” You scratch your forehead nervously. “Yes, I do work at Fancy and Honey’s.” You say, shifting from one foot to the other. “But I’m not a stylist. I’m the receptionist. And sometimes I wash hair. When it’s really busy.” This revelation is met with silence. You watch Steve nervously. He flips frantically through the pile of papers on the table and then runs his hands through his hair in frustration. “Oh my god.” He says weakly. “This is a disaster.” “I’m…I’m really sorry.” You stammer. Steve turns a fiery glare on you. “Sorry can’t fix this!” He roars. You take an involuntary step back. You’ve never been comfortable with people being angry at you. “Listen Steve.” Magenta says calmly. “The way I see it, you have only one good choice.” Steve nods at her. “You’re right.” He says. “I don’t know how we’ll manage because she was the only one who applied for the Self-Care position, but…” He looks straight into your eyes. “You’re fired.” He says simply. Your stomach does an alarming flip flop and you feel tears sting your eyes. Magenta smiles gently and pats Steve’s hand again. “No Steve.” She says. “That’s not the solution here.” You can’t believe how calm and together she is in the face of this complete disaster, but you are grateful. “What do you mean?” Says Steve. “What other solution is there?” “We make her our first ''Rising Star''.” Says Magenta simply. “She gets a session with each one of us and we turn her from sow’s ear to silk purse. Then she joins the team.” Steve opens his mouth to protest but Magenta pushes on. “It’s exactly what this show is about.” She says. “Plus, it’s a way to bring the team together and hook the audience. Helping Vanessa makes her a real person, not a super star. It makes the rest of us into real people, just normal people who decided we could use our skills to help others. It makes us much more relatable to the audience and to the people we will be helping. What we have achieved becomes attainable for anyone, if they work for it. That’s a powerful message. It’s not a common one in this kind of show, but it would set us apart. I predict the applications will pour in after you air Vanessa’s episode.” Steve opens his mouth to protest again but Magenta cuts him off. “Think about it for a minute Steve.” She says, forcefully. “Before you say anything else, take a minute, and think about what I’m proposing.” Steve takes a deep breath and nods. He gathers his papers into a pile and taps the edges against the table to even them up. “I hate to say it.” He says. “And I’m really not happy with you.” He jabs a finger in your direction. “But I have to admit, it’s a good idea. We HAVE been looking for a way to bring the team together and get our viewers on board. We have some stiff competition and anything coming out of Canada has to fight for its rightful spot in the viewing line-up. So I admit, this could work. But boy, they don’t pay me enough to put out this kind of fire.” Magenta nods sympathetically. Steve looks at his pile of papers again. “Ok.” He says. “We’ll do it.” He looks at Magenta seriously. “If we can get the others on board, we’ll do it.” Magenta claps her hands and grins. “Oh, they’ll agree.” She says. Steve turns blazing eyes on you again. “But you had better not blow this chance.” He says sternly. “Because it is the only one you’re gonna get.” You smile weakly and open your mouth to thank him but he cuts you off. “Now get out of my trailer!” He shouts slamming his fist down on the table. You jump and grab for the door handle. But Magenta gets up calmly and puts her arm around you. “Come on.” She says. “We have work to do.” [[You follow Magenta to the Mess Trailer|Mess Magenta]] [[You go to the Mess Trailer on your own while Magenta rounds up the others.|Mess without Magenta]]

''You decide that you are just going to wing it and see what happens. You are smart and resourceful. You can do this.'' Magenta pats your arm and nods. You can’t help thinking that she’s probably disappointed with your choice. But you just can’t face the prospect of being fired and likely publicly disgraced. You gulp down air is a desperate attempt to calm your pounding heart. Lying is not one of your strengths. “Breathe.” Says Magenta. “It is what it is. You just have to do your best. I’ll try to help you as much as I can.” You nod and glance down at your itinerary. After costumes is something called Product Tour. Maybe between them you can find a computer and do some research. Surely Google can guide you through this. You just have to be clever about it. ‘You can do this Vanessa.’ You say to yourself. ‘Just stay calm and act like you know what you are doing.' You and Magenta walk silently across the lot to the Costume Trailer, where you are met by a tall, bald man in a bright polka dot shirt with an oversized Peter Pan collar, a pair of black jeans and bright blue Cowboy boots with silver scrolling all over them. “Excellent.” He says when he sees you. “I’m Ben and I will be your Costume-ista today.” You grin in spite of the anxiety welling up in your chest. He ushers you in to the trailer and seats you in a bright orange, velvet armchair. Magenta is seated just as ceremoniously, in a deep aubergine, corduroy armchair. You look around curiously. The trailer is a big, open concept, space with a small sitting area in the centre and a tiny kitchen off to one side, separated from the sitting area by a beautiful granite topped island. The back wall is covered in a leafy print wall paper and the remaining walls are a deep blue colour. The floor looks like it was made out of individual wooden rounds cut from the trunk of a tree. “So.” Says Ben briskly once you are settled. “Really, on a show like this, your look is up to you. We just want to make sure that what you wear can be shown on MeshFlix. I mean, it is the internet, but still, nothing too revealing. Political is ok as long as it’s not offensive, because this is Canada and we don’t like to ruffle each other’s feathers too much. But, you know, also be yourself.” You nod, uncertainly. “If you need us to curate a look for you or find you any pieces, we can do that. We can probably even pay for the pieces.” Ben continues. “But mostly, we expect you to be in charge of your costume.” “So, we have a costume department…” Magenta says, spreading her arms open and motioning around the room, which, you notice, is distinctly lacking any type of clothing rack, or dressing room, or mirrors or anything that would identify it as a Costume trailer. “We had a budget for the trailer, which, as you can see is fan. Tast. Tic.” Says Ben. “Not so much for costumes for the cast. And we don’t want you to look like we’ve dressed you, because we want this show to feel homey, if you know what I mean.” “So, what do we do in here?” Asks Magenta. Ben flops dramatically into a blue and white checkered faux suede arm chair opposite you. “I’ve tried to create a little oasis here for anyone who needs a break, or a warm drink that doesn’t come from snooty barista Mitch out there, or a heart to heart or a place to take a nap. You know, a safe space for whatever you need.” Says Ben. “Wait.” You say, completely missing the point. “The barista at the coffee hut? But he’s lovely.” Ben springs forward in his chair and points a finger at you. “Nu-oh.” He says. “Sa-noot-ty.” He nods and flops back against the back rest, exhausted. Magenta stands up and smooths down her skirt. “Right.” She says. “Thank you, Ben for that enlightening conversation. I’m off to the Production trailer for the Product Tour. You coming Vanessa?” [[“Yes. Thanks for your help Ben.” You say.|Ben helps 1]] [[“Actually, I think I might stay and talk to Ben a bit longer.”|Stay with Ben 1]]

''You decide you are going to agree to Magenta’s plan to make you the first project. It might even be fun rather than mortifying.'' “I think that’s a great choice!” Says Magenta squeezing your arm a little. “Come on. We’ll go talk it over with Steve right now.” You take a deep breath and mentally try to prepare yourself to be fired, which, you reflect, is the only possible outcome this decision can have. Steve is pouring over the papers he has spread out across the tables in the Production Trailer. He looks up and smiles when Magenta opens the door. “Hi there.” He says. “Is everything ok? Aren’t you two supposed to be in Costuming right now?” “Steve, sweetie.” Says Magenta in her silky, calm way. “Sit down for a minute. We need to talk to you.” Steve’s smile freezes momentarily and his eyes flit back and forth between you and Magenta, but she pats his arm reassuringly and he sits down in his chair and looks at her expectantly. “There comes a moment, Steve, in everyone’s life journey, when they can choose the easy, obvious road, or they can take a risk on an unknown road that might end up being the best choice they have ever made. Steve, I am about to present you with such a choice.” You watch, awestruck, as Magenta lays out the truth about who you are to Steve and her suggestion for making it part of the show. Steve’s features go through a gamut of emotions from fury to confusion to admiration, all in the span of about 15 minutes. When Magenta has finished explaining, Steve sits, staring at the far wall of the trailer with his head in his hands for what seems like an eternity. And then he turns to face you. “I should fire you on the spot.” He says. You drop your gaze to the floor and brace yourself for whatever is to come. “However, Magenta is right. That isn’t what this show is about. Plus, you were the only one who applied for the Self-Help Stylist position. We did not get a good turn-out at the auditions.” He pauses for a moment to beam at Magenta, clearly grateful to have her on board. “We’ve been looking for a way to bring the team together and get our viewers on board. We have some stiff competition and anything coming out of Canada has to fight for its rightful spot in the viewing line-up, and this might be just the thing. A black sheep story. Very Canadian. So, you will be our first Star. Congratulations. You lucked out today. If Magenta had not spoken up for you, you would be fired and slinking back home in shame. So don’t blow it, Johnson. Because this is the only chance you’re gonna get.” You smile and open your mouth to thank him but he cuts you off. “Now get out of my trailer!” He shouts at you. You jump and grab for the door handle. But Magenta gets up calmly and puts her arm around you. “Come on.” She says. “We have work to do.” [[You follow Magenta to the Mess Trailer|Mess Magenta]] [[You go to the Mess Trailer on your own while Magenta rounds up the others.|Mess without Magenta]]

Magenta guides you gently to the Commissary and sits you down at a table in the far corner. “Ok.” She says. “I’m going to go find the others and also Alexa and explain what’s happening. You ok?” You nod vaguely, feeling lightheaded. “Hmmm.” She says. “Wait here.” She strides off and returns a moment later with a large green smoothie and a package of energy bites. “Here, drink this and I’ll be right back. And don’t worry. This is going to work out. You’ll see.” She gives your shoulder a light squeeze and strides out of the trailer. You look at your smoothie mournfully. It doesn’t matter what Magenta thinks, you are certain that at any moment Steve is going to come bursting through the door and tell you you’re fired. How could you have been so stupid! Five gulps of your smoothie later, the door of the Commissary does burst open. But it isn’t Steve. It’s Magenta, followed by Grey, Toni, Kerry, Robbie and Alexa. The only one who looks unhappy is Alexa. “What were you thinking?!” She spits out as soon as she sees you. You open your mouth to apologize but Magenta cuts you off. “Listen.” She says. “It is what it is and frankly, this is a pretty brave move by Vanessa. So, you can punish her or you can help her but if you choose to punish her, I’m out. That is not what this show is about.” The others murmur their agreement. Whatever she said to them seems to have convinced them that you are worth taking a chance on. Alexa rolls her eyes and sighs. “Fine.” She says testily. “And I agree, this is going to work but jeez, this is not a good way to start a new job, just saying.” “Sit down, everyone.” Says Magenta pointing to the chairs. The others sit and lean forward expectantly except for Alexa who flops down in a chair a few feet apart from the rest of the group. “So, we’ve spoken and we all agree, you will be the Star of the first episode of Kweens without Krowns and afterwards you will officially join our team.” Says Magenta. “But you are not going to have it easy Vanessa. You have to learn a lot in a short amount of time.” You nod. “And we expect you to make the most of this opportunity.” Adds Grey. “Because you have definitely made our jobs harder.” You nod again. “Well then. Are we ready to get started?” Asks Robbie. You nod, feeling worried and excited at the same time. “Right.” Says Grey. “Here’s how it’s going to work. You are going to have one session with each of us where we are going to help you develop your Self-Care style and find your areas of expertise. You are probably a lot more talented than you think you are already, so don’t worry. Anything you can’t do, or can’t learn to do in a week or two, we’ll get an “assistant” to do for you until you learn how to do it yourself. Got it?” You nod. Grey turns to Alexa. “Are we ready to start filming today?” “Yep.” Says Alexa. “That part of the schedule hasn’t changed. Everyone is to go to make-up and costuming and then meet on the set.” “Good.” Says Grey turning to look at you. “So, which session would you like to start with?” [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]

You stumble through the doorway of the Commissary and look around. It’s a pretty plain looking trailer with long rows of tables running down the centre and a few round tables at the back and in the corners. There is a long food counter at the front and you walk up, grab a tray and load it up with a banana, what looks like a breakfast panini, and a glass of juice. Feeling kind of shaky, you carry your tray to a round table in the far corner and slump down in a comfortable arm chair. You drop your face into your hands and sigh heavily. “This was a really stupid idea.” You mutter to yourself. “In a lifetime of stupid ideas.” “What’s going on?” Asks a voice behind you. “What are you doing here?” You look up and see Alexa standing next to your chair, clipboard in hand, scowl on face. “Oh, uh, hi.” You say brightly. You wonder if you should fill her in or wait for Magenta? Alexa raises her eyebrows at you impatiently. “Well?” [[You decide to tell Alexa what is going on.]] [[You decide to stall]] (ok, lie, why not, this whole day has been a lie, why stop now?)

''“Yes. Thanks for your help Ben.” You say.'' “Of course, Kween!” He says, waving you out. You step out of the trailer with Magenta. “So, what exactly is a Product Tour?” You ask. “Well,” says Magenta. “We have some sponsors for the show and we are going to work with some small businesses, and maybe some larger ones, so Steve has been busy building partnerships with them so we can show their brands on the show and so that we can have the run of their businesses for shooting. So lots of them have sent over product samples or swatches or product catalogues so that we can make some decisions about the products we will use fairly consistently. And so they can make sure they have what we need. This is just for the first few ''Stars'', so far, based on the specific things they will need our help with. We will probably learn about the first ''Star'' at the Product Tour.” “So, I am going to have to choose actual products I want to use on this person?” You ask feeling the familiar sense of panic rising in your stomach. “Yes.” Says Magenta. “Why? What did you think we were going to be doing today?” “Oh, uh, honestly, I don’t know.” You admit. “But I was hoping to have a few hours with my good friend Google before having to make any real decisions about self-care for someone else.” You are starting to think winging it might have been a bad idea. You wonder if it is too late to ask Magenta to help you. Magenta stops walking and looks at you seriously. “Do you really think this is something you can fake by searching for quick fixes on Google?” She asks. You get the impression that a lot rides on your answer. “Yes?” You say, hesitantly. But actually, you are not at all sure anymore. Magenta looks disappointed. “Huh.” She says. “I thought you were better than that Vanessa. But it seems like you have absolutely no respect for any of us or what we are trying to do on this show.” Her words hit you like a punch in the ear. “That’s not true!” You start to say. “I really thought you were a smart, talented, motivated person who had just made a stupid mistake in order to get a break.” Magenta interrupts you. “But now I see that you are just a selfish, self-centered kid who has no understanding of how hard life can be for some people or how wonderful it is that we might have a chance to make someone’s life a little lighter.” You feel your face flame red and stare abruptly down at your feet. “I’m sorry.” You say quietly. “I do respect you. And I really want to be on this show and do a good job and be a better person in general. And right now, I’m just making all the wrong choices.” Magenta nods. “I’ll second that.” She says grimly. “I need your help.” You say softly, closing your eyes in order to calm your thoughts. “Why?” Asks Magenta. “So you can bullshit your way through this show and possibly ruin it for everyone?” “No!” You say. “Because I want to do a good job. I don’t want to be a pathetic loser!” “Ok.” Says Magenta, but her voice is cold and hard. “I’ll help you.” You follow her into the production trailer. [[Product Tour]]

''“Actually, I think I might stay and talk to Ben a bit longer.”'' Magenta raises a questioning eyebrow at you, then shrugs and steps out of the trailer. You look at Ben desperately. “Do you have a computer I can use in this oasis?” You ask. Ben looks surprised, then pleased, then suspicious. “Of course, Kween!” He says, standing up and smoothing out his shirt. “But what’s this about? What’s going on? I have a nose that can sniff out a mystery from a kilometer away.” You smile benignly and shake your head. “Oh, no, it’s nothing at all.” You say. “I just promised work that I would send in my final hours and I forgot to do that this morning.” Ben strides to the kitchen as though he’s on the fashion runway, and returns a moment later with a sleek silver laptop. “Work?” He says, putting the laptop on the table in front of you. “Yes, you know, what I did before I got hired here.” You say, avoiding his gaze and opening the computer. “And what did you do before you got hired here?” Ben says meaningfully. “I worked at Fancy and Honey’s.” You say without looking up. You navigate to the search bar and type in: 'best beauty products 2021'. You quickly open the first 5 hits in different tabs and then change the search to: 'learn the basics of cutting hair in no time'. You open the first 5 hits of that search in separate tabs as well. When you look up again, Ben is staring at you with such intensity that it makes you feel instantly anxious and sweaty. Like you are about to be attacked by a panther. “I knew I recognized you.” He says as soon as he has your attention. You raise your eyebrows in surprise. “Oh?” You say, surreptitiously scrolling through a list of beauty products recommended by someone at the New York Times. Ben leans all the way forward in his chair and rests his chin on the edge of the laptop. It’s such a funny image that you can’t help but laugh. Ben leaps to his feet and points at you imperiously. “You are the receptionist!” He shouts. “I knew I recognized you!” “Shhhh!” You say desperately. “Listen. I can explain.” “Oh. No. You. Can’t.” Says Ben. “Because there is no explanation for this, except for one, which I have already guessed.” You close the laptop, resigned. “Ok Ben.” You say, raising your hands in surrender. “You have lied and cheated your way onto this set.” Says Ben, collapsing back into the armchair. He looks thoughtful for a second and then smiles brightly at you. “Which, I must say, is a ballsy move. I would not have thought you could be ballsy. You’re always 'Have a nice day.' And 'Your cut looks great!' and 'That colour looks so good on you.'” “That’s my job, Ben.” You say defensively, forgetting for a moment that he has caught you in the biggest lie you have ever told. “Sure honey.” He says kindly. “It is your job, but it is not ballsy! And what you have done here is ball-sy. Stupid, but ballsy.” “I know.” You say gloomily. Ben reaches over and gives your hand a pat. “Does anyone else know?” He asks. “Or is it just me?” You sigh. “No, Magenta knows.” You say. Ben nods. “I thought I felt something when the two of you walked in.” “She suggested I come clean, but I just...wasn’t sure I could face it.” You explain. Ben nods. “Oh honey.” He says. “I know you are an actor and all, but there is no act you can put on that can get you out of this one. There is just no way to fake being able to cut and style hair and do make-up. It’s an art honey. It takes years to learn.” You drop your head into your hands. “I know.” You mutter through your fingers. “This whole this was such a stupid idea.” Ben stands up and glides around the table to the purple corduroy chair. He scoots the chair closer to you until the armrests are touching and sits back down. “But you have come to the right man.” He says. “Oh yes, you have.” You look up to see him staring intensely at you. “What do you mean Ben?” “Oh honey! I am a stylist!” He says. “I can cut, colour, style, layer, balayage, beehive and fade with the best of them. Plus, beauty is my religion! Look at this skin! Look at these lashes, hunn-ey! Gorgeous!” Ben fans his face with his hands as you peer at his skin. It is remarkably smooth and uniform and his lashes are long, dark and thick. You nod. “I see.” You say. “So, why weren’t you hired?” Ben gives you a disappointed look. “Oh right.” You say. “I forgot. But really Ben, you’d be perfect for this job.” “I know!” He says. “So I have a proposition to make.” “Let’s have it!” You say, far too enthusiastically. “You tell them that you need an assistant.” Says Ben. “And you pick me. Then, I do all the grunt work. I cut the hair and style the hair and do the make-up and pick the products. But we make it look like you are the one making all the decisions. You remain the expert and I get to do what I love. It’s a double win honey!” [[“Oh my god!” You say, clutching his hand. “It just might work.”|It just might work 1]] [[“That would never work.” You say sadly. “Magenta knows and I have a feeling that by now, the others know too.”|That will never work]]

''The Product Tour'' The whole team is there, sitting around the table, examining swatches of paint, catalogues of clothes, pictures of furniture and cook books. Steve looks up and smiles as you come in. “There you guys are!” He says. “I thought Ben had taken you hostage!” Magenta smiles at him tensely. “What’s up?” He asks, puzzled. Magenta ushers you forward gently. “Vanessa has something to say to you all.” She says firmly. You clear your throat. “The thing is.” You say. “I don’t have much experience as a Self-Care specialist at all.” Toni raises her eyebrows at you in surprise and Grey sits up straighter, suddenly interested. “Actually.” You continue. “I’m not a stylist. Or as aesthetician. Or a beauty specialist. I’m just an out of work actor looking for a break.” There is a moment of absolute silence during which you look from face to face for some kind of clue as to what is about to happen. “Shit.” Says Toni. “This is not good.” “Not good at all.” Says Grey. “Wait. How is that possible?” Says Steve, flipping through some papers on the table. “It says here, you work at Fancy and Honey’s. And I have a note here that we called to check and they said you are great at your job and they couldn’t get by without you.” You scratch your forehead nervously. “Yes, I do work at Fancy and Honey’s” You say, shifting from one foot to the other. “But I’m not a stylist. I’m the receptionist. And sometimes I wash hair. When it’s really busy.” This revelation is met with raised eyebrows. You glance nervously at Steve, who is still flipping frantically through the pile of papers on the table. “Oh my god.” Says Steve weakly. “This is a disaster.” “I’m…I’m really sorry.” You stammer. Steve turns a fiery glare on you. “Sorry can’t fix this!” He roars. You take an involuntary step back. You’ve never been comfortable with people being angry at you. You look around the table and see disappointment, shock, and curiosity. “Ok, it is pretty bad.” Says Magenta. “But I have an idea that I think will solve all our problems at once.” She turns to look at you. “Vanessa? I need you to go wait outside while I talk to the others? Go for a walk, go get a coffee, breathe. I’ll come and find you when we’ve had a chance to talk this over.” You nod numbly and let her lead you out the door. [[You decide to go to the coffee hut and get a drink to take your mind off the situation.|Coffee hut]] [[You decide to go just sit down on the ground outside the trailer and wait for the wonderful people inside to pronounce your sentence.|Sit on ground]] [[You decide to go back to the Costume Trailer and talk to Ben. He did say it was an oasis after all.|Back to Ben]]

''Production trailer'' “I think we might be able to swing something.” Magenta whispers ushering you back into the Production trailer. “Leave it to me.” You step inside the trailer. Steve is standing at the head of the table. He glowers at you as you step in to the trailer. Everyone else is now sitting together along one side of the table, including Ben, who claps his hands together lightly when you walk in. “By rights, you should be fired right now.” Says Steve crisply. You drop your gaze to the floor and brace yourself for whatever is to come. “However, Magenta has presented us with a different possibility and, as much as it irks me to say this, I think she is right. Plus, you were the only one who applied for the Self-Celp Stylist position. We did not get a good turn-out at the auditions.” Ben clears his throat conspicuously. “We’ve talked about this Ben.” Says Steve. “It’s not that you wouldn’t be perfect for the job. It’s that it would upset the balance we are trying to achieve here.” Ben sighs sadly and rolls his eyes. You give him a sympathetic look. “We’ve been looking for a way to bring this team together and get our viewers on board. We have some stiff competition and anything coming out of Canada has to fight for its rightful spot in the viewing line-up, and this might be just the thing. So, you will be our first Star. Congratulations. You lucked out today. If Magenta had not spoken up for you, you would be fired and pedaling yourself home. So don’t blow it, Johnson. Because this is the only chance you’re gonna get.” You open your eyes wide in disbelief. “But, I can’t do anything!” You protest. Grey stands up and clears her throat meaningfully. “I might have a solution to that that would make everyone happy.” She says. Magenta sits back down and nods at her encouragingly. “Here’s what I propose.” Says Grey. “You will have one session with each of us where we will help you develop your Self-Care style and find your areas of expertise. You are probably a lot more talented than you think you are already. Anything you can’t do, or can’t learn to do in a week or two, we’ll get an assistant to do for you until you learn how to do it yourself. And, I propose that that assistant, be Ben.” Ben lets out a sharp squeal of delight and leaps to his feet! “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!” He shouts, hopping up and down and clapping his hands together. Steve sits stunned for a moment and then breaks into a grin. “Grey.” He says. “That is just a supremely excellent idea.” He pushes his chair back forcefully, stands up and throws his arms around Ben. “I’m so happy for you sweetie!” He says. “So it’s a yes?” Asks Ben. “It’s a ‘yes’.” Agrees Steve. You let out a long, slow breath you were not aware you had been holding. “So.” Says Grey. “Are we ready to get this party started?” There is a chorus of enthusiastic ‘yesses’ around the table. Grey looks at you intently. “It is not going to be easy Vanessa. You have to learn a lot in a short amount of time.” She says. You nod, unable to make a sound. “And we expect you to make the most of this opportunity. Because you have definitely made our jobs harder.” You nod again. Ben strides over to you and gives you a big hug. “You got this Kween!” He whispers. “Embrace it!” You smile. “I understand.” You say. “I’ll do my best to make this worth it for all of you. I can’t even find the words to express my gratitude…” Grey waves your words away airily. “Never mind that.” She says. “Which session would you like to start with?” [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]

''“Oh my god!” You say, clutching his hand. “It just might work.”'' Ben gives a squeal of excitement and then clamps a hand over his mouth. “Sorry.” He says, grinning at you. “I should try to stay calm.” You nod and take a deep breath. “Ok.” You say uncertainly. “Well, we should probably get to the Product Tour. Everyone will wonder what’s happened…” You trail off as it dawns on you what you are about to pull off and the unlikely chances that you will succeed. But Ben seems excited, so you follow him out of the Costume Trailer and along the well-worn path to Production. Ben knocks lightly on the door and then pulls it open without waiting for an answer from inside. You follow him into the trailer. The whole team is there, sitting around the table, examining swatches of paint, catalogues of clothes, pictures of furniture and cook books. “Ben!” Says Steve in surprise. “Stevie.” Says Ben, smiling coyly at him. “And I’ve brought my good friend Vanessa with me.” Steve looks at you darkly. “Vanessa.” He says. “You’re late for the Product Tour.” “Uh, yes, well…” You stammer. “We got a bit delayed in Costuming.” Ben comes to your rescue. With utter confidence, he strides over to the table and sits down next to Grey. Steve looks puzzled. “What are you doing Ben?” He asks. “Ask Vanessa.” Says Ben. “I’m just her assistant.” Steve narrows his eyes at you and you feel your determination dissolve. “What does he mean, he’s your assistant?” He asks. You swallow hard and apply the smile you use when dealing with particularly bothersome clients at the salon. “Well Steve…” You begin shakily. “Being a Self-Care Stylist is a big job. It encompasses physical self-care, like hairstyling, skin care, make-up, nail care and all of those things we can see. But it also includes care of the ‘self’. You know, motivation, habits, making good choices in terms of food or work or responsibilities to others…” You trail off. Steve raises his eyebrows at you and nods. “And…” He prompts. You gulp again and adjust your smile. “Well, I was thinking about it and I decided I needed an assistant to help take care of some of the…run of the mill tasks, so I can focus on the larger ones.” You glance at Magenta. She stares at you sadly. “Shit.” You mutter under your breath. Steve narrows his eyes at you and then looks over at Ben. “What’s really going on?” He says. Ben smiles brightly and shrugs his shoulders in a 'don’t ask me, I don’t know’ gesture. Steve catches sight of Magenta’s pained expression. “Magenta?” He asks. Magenta straightens her posture and puts on a neutral expression. Slowly she stands up. “We all have to live with the decisions we make.” She begins. You see the faces of the other women around the table shift to uncertainty. “And some of us can live without integrity or authenticity.” Magenta continues. “And some of us can’t. And frankly, if you are one of the ones that can Vanessa, then you shouldn’t be here. Because this show is about integrity. It’s about authenticity. It’s about genuine care and concern for others. There is no room for selfish or self-centered thinking.” She pauses and looks at you expectantly. All other eyes around the table follow her gaze. There is a long, awkward silence. You swallow twice to try to get rid of the lump in your throat and then: [[Decide to resign with dignity and return to your old life with your reputation intact.Resign with dignity]] [[Decide to tell the truth about what you have done.]]

''“That would never work.”'' Ben gives you a sad smile and squeezes your shoulder. “What are you going to do?” He asks. “I guess I’ll have to go and face the consequences of what I’ve done.” You say. “Magenta did have an idea she thought would work but…” “But?” Says Ben, eagerness rising in his voice. “Steve would never go for it.” You say. “I’ll just be fired and that will be that. But that does leave the door open for you Ben. You could take another shot at it. See if they can make an exception. Gay men can be Kweens too.” “Honey!” Says Ben crisply. “Gay men are the original Kweens! I’ll go with you.” Once again, you find yourself on the well-worn path to the Production Trailer. Ben knocks lightly on the door and then pulls it open without waiting for an answer from inside. You follow him into the trailer. The whole team is there, sitting around the table, looking at each other grimly. “Ben!” Says Steve in surprise. “Stevie.” Says Ben, smiling coyly at him. “And I’ve brought my good friend Vanessa with me.” Steve looks at you darkly. “Vanessa.” He says. “You’re late for the Product Tour.” “Uh, yes, well…” You stammer. Ben glides over to Steve and pats his shoulder. “Oh Stevie.” He says. “This is about so much more than products.” Steve looks around the table, confusion and concern growing in his eyes, and then back at you. “What’s going on.” He says. Ben pats him on the shoulder again and takes a seat next to him at the table. Magenta stands up and glances over at you. You nod your head at her but stay close to the door in case you have to make a speedy escape. “There comes a moment, Steve, in everyone’s life journey, when they can choose the easy, obvious road, or they can take a risk on an unknown road that might end up being the best choice they have ever made.” She says. “I am about to present you with such a choice.” You watch, awestruck, as Magenta lays out the truth about who you are to Steve and outlines her suggestion for making it part of the show. Steve’s features go through a gamut of emotions from fury to confusion to admiration, all in the span of about 15 minutes. When Magenta has finished explaining, Steve sits, staring at the far wall of the trailer with his head in his hands for what seems like an eternity. And then he turns to face you. “I should fire you on the spot.” He says. You drop your gaze to the floor and brace yourself for whatever is to come. “Oh Stevie, no!” Says Ben. “Think before you speak!” Steve flashes Ben a smile. “Don’t worry Ben.” He says. “As much as it irks me to say this, I think Magenta is right. Plus, you were the only one who applied for the Self-Help Stylist position. We did not get a good turn-out at the auditions.” Ben clears his throat conspicuously. “We’ve talked about this Ben.” Says Steve. “It’s not that you wouldn’t be perfect for the job. It’s that it would upset the balance we are trying to achieve here.” Ben sighs sadly and takes his hand off Steve’s shoulder. You give him a sympathetic look. “We’ve been looking for a way to bring this team together and get our viewers on board. We have some stiff competition and anything coming out of Canada has to fight for its rightful spot in the viewing line-up, and this might be just the thing. A black sheep story. Canadian's love that. So, you will be our first ''Star''. Congratulations. You lucked out today. If Magenta had not spoken up for you, you would be fired and pedaling yourself home. So don’t blow it, Johnson. Because this is the only chance you’re gonna get.” You open your eyes wide in disbelief. “But, I can’t do anything!” You protest. Grey stands up and clears her throat meaningfully. “I might have a solution to that, that would make everyone happy.” She says. Magenta sits back down and nods at her encouragingly. “Here’s what I propose.” Says Grey. “You will have one session with each of us where we will help you develop your Self-Care style and find your areas of expertise. You are probably a lot more talented than you think you are. Anything you can’t do, or can’t learn to do in a week or two, we’ll get an assistant to do for you until you learn how to do it yourself. And, I propose that that assistant, be Ben.” Ben lets out a sharp squeal and leaps to his feet! “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!” He shouts, hopping up and down and clapping his hands together. Steve sits stunned for a moment and then breaks into a grin. “Grey.” He says. “That is just a supremely excellent idea.” He pushes his chair back forcefully, stands up and throws his arms around Ben. “I’m so happy for you sweetie!” He says. “So it’s a 'yes?'” Asks Ben. “It’s a ‘yes’.” Agrees Steve. You let out a long, slow breath you were not aware you had been holding. “So.” Says Grey. “Are we ready to get this party started?” There is a chorus of enthusiastic ‘yesses’ around the table. Grey looks at you intently. “It is not going to be easy Vanessa. You have to learn a lot in a short amount of time.” She says. You nod, unable to make a sound. “And we expect you to make the most of this opportunity.” Adds Grey. “Because you have definitely made our jobs harder.” You nod again. Ben strides over to you and gives you a big hug. “You got this Kween!” He whispers. “Embrace it!” You smile. “I understand.” You say. “I’ll do my best to make this worth it for all of you. I can’t even find the words to express my gratitude…” Grey waves your words away airily. “Never mind that.” She says. “Which session would you like to start with?” [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]

''Decide to resign with dignity and return to your old life with your reputation intact.'' “Actually.” You say. “I’ve come to tell you that I have to leave the show.” You glance at Magenta who is shaking her head, her eyes wide with shock. Steve sets his papers down carefully. “I’m sorry, what?” He says. You sigh. “I don’t think I can continue with the show.” You say. “I’m sorry for wasting your time. I hope you find the perfect person to be the Self-Care Stylist. In fact, I think Ben would be perfect. You should really consider him for the job.” Steve flashes a sharp glare at Ben. “Are you responsible for this?” He asks. Ben holds up his hands in a ‘not guilty’ gesture. Steve turns back to face you. “I don’t understand what is happening here.” He says. Grey stands up smoothly and adjusts her hair with a flick of her head. “I think it’s obvious Steve.” She says. “Vanessa is quitting the show.” “But why?!” Wails Steve. “Good question.” Says Grey turning to look at you. “Why are you quitting the show?” [[You decide to wrap this up quickly so that you can go home and binge watch MeshFlix and comfort eat carbs.|Wrap quickly]] [[Decide to tell the truth about what you have done.]]

''Decide to tell the truth about what you have done.'' “The truth is, I don’t have much experience as a self-care specialist at all.” You say slowly. Toni raises her eyebrows at you in surprise and Grey stares at you intently. You take a deep breath. “Actually.” You continue. “I’m not a stylist. Or as aesthetician. Or any kind of beauty specialist at all! I’m just an out of work actor looking for a break.” “What do you mean?” Says Steve, flipping through some papers on the table. “It says here, you work at Fancy and Honey’s. And I have a note here that we called to check and they gave you a glowing reference. Specifically, they said you are great at your job and they couldn’t get by without you.” You scratch your forehead nervously. “Yes, I do work at Fancy and Honey’s” You say. “But I’m not a stylist. I’m the receptionist. And sometimes I wash hair. When it’s really busy.” This revelation is met with silence and raised eyebrows except for Ben, who looks positively thrilled. Steve raises his eyebrows and Ben who tries, without success, to put on a neutral expression. “You knew about this?” He asks. Ben shrugs. “So she’s a receptionist.” He says. “That doesn’t mean she can’t also be a great Self-Care Stylist. You started your career as a party tent delivery man and now look at you!” He says calmly. “Oh my god.” Says Steve weakly. “This is a disaster.” “I’m…I’m really sorry.” You stammer. Steve turns a fiery glare on you. “Sorry can’t fix this!” He roars. You take an involuntary step back. You’ve never been comfortable with people being angry at you but you have no one but yourself to blame for your discomfort this time. You look around the table and see disappointment, shock, and curiosity. Magenta stands up and smooths out her dress. “Listen Steve.” She says firmly. “There comes a moment in everyone’s life journey, when they can choose the easy, obvious road, or they can take a risk on an unknown road that might end up being the best choice they have ever made. I am about to present you with such a choice.” You watch, awestruck, as Magenta lays out the truth about who you are to Steve and outlines her suggestion for making it part of the show. Steve’s features go through a gamut of emotions from fury to confusion to admiration, all in the span of about 15 minutes. When Magenta has finished explaining, Steve sits, staring at the far wall of the trailer with his head in his hands for what seems like an eternity. And then he turns to face you. “I should fire you on the spot.” He says. You drop your gaze to the floor and brace yourself for whatever is to come. “Oh Stevie, no!” Says Ben. “Think before you speak!” Steve flashes Ben a smile. “Don’t worry Ben.” He says. “As much as it irks me to say this, I think Magenta is right. Plus, you were the only one who applied for the Self-Care Stylist position. We did not get a good turn-out at the auditions.” Ben clears his throat conspicuously. “We’ve talked about this Ben.” Says Steve. “It’s not that you wouldn’t be perfect for the job. It’s that it would upset the balance we are trying to achieve here.” Ben sighs sadly and takes his hand off Steve’s shoulder. You give him a sympathetic look. “We’ve been looking for a way to bring this team together and get our viewers on board. We have some stiff competition and anything coming out of Canada has to fight for its rightful spot in the viewing line-up, and this might be just the thing. A black sheep story. Canadians love those. So, you will be our first ''Star''. Congratulations. You lucked out today. If Magenta had not spoken up for you, you would be fired and pedaling yourself home. So don’t blow it, Johnson. Because this is the only chance you’re gonna get.” You open your eyes wide in disbelief. “But, I can’t do anything!” You protest. Grey stands up and clears her throat meaningfully. “I might have a solution to that that would make everyone happy.” She says. Magenta sits back down and nods at her encouragingly. “Here’s what I propose.” Says Grey. “You will have one session with each of us where we will help you develop your Self-Care style and find your areas of expertise. You are probably a lot more talented than you think you are already. Anything you can’t do, or can’t learn to do in a week or two, we’ll get an assistant to do for you until you learn how to do it yourself. And, I propose that that assistant, be Ben.” Ben lets out a sharp squeal of delight and leaps to his feet! “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!” He shouts, hopping up and down and clapping his hands together. Steve sits stunned for a moment and then breaks into a grin. “Grey.” He says. “That is just a supremely excellent idea.” He pushes his chair back forcefully, stands up and throws his arms around Ben. “I’m so happy for you sweetie!” He says. “So it’s a yes?” Asks Ben. “It’s a ‘yes’.” Agrees Steve. You let out a long, slow breath you were not aware you had been holding. “So.” Says Grey. “Are we ready to get this party started?” There is a chorus of enthusiastic ‘yesses’ around the table. Grey looks at you intently. “It is not going to be easy Vanessa. You have to learn a lot in a short amount of time.” She says. You nod, unable to make a sound. “And we expect you to make the most of this opportunity. Because you have definitely made our jobs harder.” You nod again. Ben strides over to you and gives you a big hug. “You got this Kween!” He whispers. “Embrace it!” You smile. “I understand.” You say. “I’ll do my best to make this worth it for all of you. I can’t even find the words to express my gratitude…” Grey waves your words away airily. “Never mind that.” She says. “Which session would you like to start with?” [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Fashion]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]

''You decide to wrap this up quickly so that you can go home and binge watch MeshFlix and comfort eat carbs.'' “It’s just more than I can handle right now.” You say, turning to open the trailer door. You glance at Magenta one more time. “Just tell them.” She mouths at you. You shake your head. “I’m really sorry.” You say. You pull open the trailer door and step outside. You pause for a moment and take a deep breath of fresh air. You feel lighter and your heart slows its frantic thumping. You trudge across the lot towards the southeast corner. There is no line up outside the coffee hut now and the Barista, Mitch, is sitting outside sipping a green smoothie through a glass straw. “God, why is everyone so perfect here.” You mutter out loud as you trudge along. Mitch stands up when he sees you. “Tough day?” He asks. You don’t slow your walk. “You could say that.” You say. Mitch falls into step beside you. “Hey. Everyone has hard days.” He says. “But you look like you’re ready to give up.” You stop and smile sadly at him. “Not ready to give up.” You say. “Have given up. I’m going home.” “What?!” Says Mitch. “Have they fired you?” “No.” You say. “I quit. It…it just wasn’t the right job for me.” Mitch nods. “That’s how I became a barista.” He says. “Auditioned for a part that was way beyond what I could actually pull off, got spooked and quit. Then they hired me to do coffee and I’ve been in this shack ever since.” You stop walking. “Is that true?” You ask. Mitch nods and takes a long sip of his smoothie. “Yep.” He says. “But, I don’t regret it. Not really. I wasn’t cut out to be an actor.” You nod. “Well, it was nice to meet you Mitch.” You say. “Nice to meet you too Vanessa.” He says. “Maybe I’ll see you on another shoot?” You shrug sadly. “You never know.” You say. You give Mitch a little wave and turn towards the courthouse. Just as you step over the parking barrier, you hear someone call out your name. “Vanessa!” You spin around and see Magenta and Ben hurrying towards you. “Kween!” Says Ben. “You would not believe what Magenta here just pulled off!” “What do you mean?” You ask. “What he means is, I told them what you did and proposed my idea and they flipped for it!” Says Magenta. “If you want, you can come back and be the Self-Care Stylist and our first ''Rising Star''! We’ll each do a session with you to help you figure out your Self-Care strengths and style and then, you’ll officially join the Sensational Six!” “And.” Says Ben, putting a hand on your shoulder. “Guess who is going to be your assistant, Kween?” “No way.” You say, astonished. “Yes way!” He says bouncing up and down on the balls of his feet. “So, what do you say?” Says Magenta. “Will you come back with us and be part of the show?” [[“I would love to.”]] [[“I prefer not to.”]]

''“I would love to.”'' “Yay!” Says Ben leaping towards you but stopping short of throwing his arms around you. “Hug?” You smile and nod and Ben wraps his long, skinny arms around you. “Phew.” Says Magenta. “I was worried you were really going to leave there.” “For a minute, I was worried I was too.” You say. “Come on.” Says Magenta. “They’re waiting for us in Production.” She loops her arm through one of your arms and Ben loops his through the other and you walk back to Production like that. As the trailer comes into view, you slow down. “Listen.” You say. “I want to thank both of you for being such good friends and taking a chance to help me.” Magenta gives your arm a light squeeze and ushers you back into the trailer. Grey breaks into a smile as soon as you step through the door. “Fantastic!” She says. “This is going to be awesome.” “Welcome back Vanessa.” Says Steve with forced calm. “There’s nothing like drama to bring a team together.” He adds, relaxing. You grin sheepishly. “I’m really sorry Steve. Everyone.” You say. “I’ll try to make it up to each of you.” “Yes.” Says Grey. “By doing an excellent job!” You laugh for the first time in what seems like hours. “Here’s what we’re going to do.” Says Grey. “You will have one session with each of us where we will help you develop your Self-Care style and find your areas of expertise. You are probably a lot more talented than you think you are already. Anything you can’t do, or can’t learn to do in a week or two, you’re assistant, the fabulous, gorgeous Ben, will help you with. At the end of the week, we will officially invite you both to join our team and then the real fun begins! Sound good?” “Yes.” You say. You just can’t believe your good fortune. “Great.” Says Grey. “Which session would you like to start with?” [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]

''“I prefer not to."'' Magenta looks disappointed. “Really?” She says. “You would really rather not grab this chance?” Ben looks at you sadly. “I have to say Vanessa.” He says. “It doesn’t make a lot of sense.” You think about it for a minute. [[“Maybe I would like to give it a try after all.”]] [[“I just don’t think I have it in me.”]]

''“Maybe I would like to give it a try after all.”'' “Yay!” Says Ben leaping towards you but stopping short of throwing his arms around you. “Hug?” You smile and nod and Ben wraps his long, skinny arms around you. “Phew.” Says Magenta. “I was worried you were really going to leave there.” “For a minute, I was worried I was too.” You say. “Come on.” Says Magenta. “They’re waiting for us in Production.” She loops her arm through one of your arms and Ben loops his through the other and you walk back to Production like that. As the trailer comes into view, you slow down. “Listen.” You say. “I want to thank both of you for being such good friends and taking a chance to help me.” Magenta gives your arm a light squeeze and ushers you back into the trailer. Grey breaks into a smile as soon as you step through the door. “Fantastic!” She says. “This is going to be awesome.” “Welcome back Vanessa.” Says Steve with forced calm. “There’s nothing like drama to bring a team together.” He adds, relaxing. You grin sheepishly. “I’m really sorry Steve, everyone.” You say. “I’ll try to make it up to each of you.” “Yes.” Says Grey. “By doing an excellent job!” You laugh for the first time in what seems like hours. “Here’s what we’re going to do.” Says Grey. “You will have one session with each of us where we will help you develop your Self-Care style and find your areas of expertise. You are probably a lot more talented than you think you are already. Anything you can’t do, or can’t learn to do in a week or two, you’re assistant, the fabulous, gorgeous Ben, will help you with. At the end of the week, we will officially invite you both to join our team and then the real fun begins! Sound good?” “Yes.” You say. You just can’t believe your good fortune. “Great.” Says Grey. “Which session would you like to start with?” [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]

''“I just don’t think I have it in me.”'' Magenta sighs. “I’m really sorry to hear that Vanessa.” She says. “I hope it doesn’t hurt your chances to do what you want in the future.” “Bye Kween.” Says Ben quietly. He and Magenta turn away from you and head back towards the Production trailer. You look up at the sky for a long moment and then step over the parking barrier and head home. It’s a nice day for a walk. End [[Credits]]

''You decide to tell Alexa what is going on.'' “I’m not who you think I am.” You say, a bit overdramatically. Alexa looks down at her clipboard and furrows her brow. “You’re not Vanessa Johnson?” She asks. “Because you look just like the head shot she sent us.” “No, no.” You say. “I am Vanessa Johnson, but I’m not a stylist. Or a self-care expert. Or anything like that.” Alexa stares at you darkly for a moment, absorbing this information. “What do you mean?” She says at last. “I called Fancy and Honey’s and they gave you a glowing report.” “I’m the receptionist.” You say bluntly. “Shit.” Says Alexa sharply. You wince. Maybe you should have waited for Magenta to come back. “But it’s ok.” You try to reassure her. “Magenta is sorting it out with Steve and the others right now.” “Crap.” Says Alexa, a bit more loudly. She flops onto the arm chair next to you and thunks her forehead against her clipboard. “If you wanted to ruin your chances of a career in entertainment, that’s your business.” She says quietly. “But why did you have to drag me down with you?” You don’t have an answer to that, so you reach out and pat her awkwardly on the back. “Don’t!” She snaps without looking up. You take a gulp of your juice and try to stop the frantic beating of your heart. At that moment the door of the Commissary opens and Magenta walks in, followed by Steve, Grey, Kerry, Toni and Robbie. She spots you in the corner and motions for the others to follow her. “Oh good.” She says when she sees Alexa. “You’re here already.” Alexa groans and Magenta looks at you with raised eyebrows. “What’s this?” She asks. “I told her.” You say. Magenta presses her lips together and rubs her left ear. “Hmmm.” She says. “Bad idea.” You nod. Magenta indicates that everyone should take a seat. There is a small ruckus as everyone pulls their chairs up to the table. “Ok look.” She says. “It’s not good.” Alexa lifts her head and glares darkly at Magenta. “But, I have a solution that I think will make everything ok.” She continues. “We’ve spoken and we all agree, for the first episode of Kweens without Krowns, Vanessa will be our ''Rising Star''. We will take her from inauthentic to fabulous and after that she will officially join our team.” “It’s not going to be easy.” Says Grey. “In fact, it’s going to be bloody difficult.” You nod gratefully. “We expect you to work super hard and make the most of this opportunity.” Adds Toni. “Because you have definitely made our jobs harder.” You nod again. “Well then. Are we ready to get started?” Asks Robbie. “Yes.” You say softly, feeling both worried and excited at the same time. “Right.” Says Grey. “Here’s how it’s going to work. You are going to have one session with each of us where we will help you develop your Self-Care style and find your areas of expertise. You are probably a lot more talented than you think you are already, so don’t worry. Anything you can’t do, or can’t learn to do in a week or two, we’ll get an “assistant” to do for you until you learn how to do it yourself. Got it?” You nod. “Good.” Says Grey turning to look at you. “So, which session would you like to start with?” [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]

''You decide to stall'' “Oh, uh, I’m just waiting for the others.” You manage to stammer. Alexa consults her clipboard. “But you’re supposed to be in Costuming.” She says, tapping the edge of the board impatiently with her pencil. “Right.” You agree. Alexa sighs and rolls her eyes. “So. Why. Are. You. Here?” She asks slowly and deliberately, punching each word in annoyance, as though she were talking to a particularly thick-headed toddler. “Well…” You say, smiling brightly at her. “Actually, I had a question for you.” “What?” Alexa takes a deep breath, obviously steadying herself before tearing your head off. Luckily, at that moment, the door of the Commissary bursts open and Magenta comes striding in, followed by Steve, Grey, Robbie, Toni and Kerry. She spots you in the corner right away. “Oh, hi Alexa.” She says cheerfully, placing a steadying hand on your shoulder. “I was just at your trailer looking for you.” Alexa narrows her eyes and looks from one smiling face to another suspiciously. “What’s going on here?” She says tersely. Magenta pulls out a chair and guides her gently into it. “There’s been a bit of a hiccup.” She says. It only takes her a few minutes to explain the situation, but during that time Alexa manages to swear in three different languages, knock over your glass of juice and break her clipboard in half. “What the hell?!” She says to you, at last. You open your mouth to speak but she cuts you off. “Why are you trying to ruin my life?” At a loss for words, you glance desperately at Magenta. “Listen.” She says, patting Alexa reassuringly on the shoulder. “I think we can all agree, it’s not good. But, I have a solution that I think will save all our butts.” You marvel at how calm and competent she sounds. “We’ve spoken and we all agree, for the first episode of Kweens without Krowns, Vanessa will be our ''Rising Star''. We will take her from failure to fabulous. That is what this show is about isn’t it? And then afterwards, she will officially join our team.” You wince at the word “failure”. “It’s not going to be easy.” Says Grey. “In fact, it’s going to be bloody hard.” You nod gratefully. “We expect you to work super hard and make the most of this opportunity.” Adds Toni. “Because you have definitely made this harder for everyone.” You nod again. “By all rights, you should be fired.” Snaps Alexa, tossing the remains of her clipboard onto the table. “But some people were born with a golden horseshoe up their butt.” “I’m sorry.” You start to say but Alexa makes a slicing motion in front of your face with her hand and you think better of it. “Ok, everyone is having some feelings about this.” Says Robbie. “And the best thing to do, I think, is to just get started.” She looks at you expectantly. “Can’t wait.” You say with false confidence. “Right.” Says Grey. “Here’s how it’s going to work. You are going to have one session with each of us where we are going to help you develop your Self-Care style and find your areas of expertise. You are probably a lot more talented than you think you are already, so don’t worry. Anything you can’t do, or can’t learn to do in a week or two, we’ll get a professional from the community to do for you until you learn how to do it yourself. Got it?” You nod. “Good.” Says Grey turning to look at you. “So, which session would you like to start with?” [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]

''Thrift Shop Warrior (Unpredictable combinations are my jam!)'' “I see.” Says Grey. You feel your heart sink. How come no one thinks thrift shops are the way to go these days? “Oh, don’t get me wrong.” Says Grey. “I love a good thrift shop find. Plus, the fashion industry is very polluting so I think reuse is an important ecological step. But, not all thrift shop finds are created equal. Are you shopping at thrift shops for aesthetics or price?” [[“I love a good vintage thrift shop find.”]] [[“Thrift shops are what I can afford right now.”]]

''Broke, Out of Work Actor (I wear my clothes until they disintegrate'') “Well, we’ve all been there.” Says Grey. “So, I can relate. So, you don’t have a lot of money for clothes and you wear your clothes a long time. Do you take good care of your clothes?” You shrug. “I don’t know.” You say. “I don’t think I ever learned what ‘taking good care of your clothes’ looks like.” Grey raises her eyebrows at you. “Ok, I’ve seen some life hacks.” You admit. “You know, put your jeans in the freezer, wash your delicates in a produce bag, but who knows if those are true or not. There’s also one that tells you to put sand paper between your windshield wiper and the car window to clear the ice off and that just seems like a good way to scratch your windshield up.” Grey laughs. “Oh, the life hack.” She says. “Well, it’s true, you should put your jeans in the freezer instead of washing them. Unless they are actually muddy or there is visible dirt on them. But the sandpaper on the windshield is probably a bad idea.” You nod. “So, what you’re saying is that you have never bought clothes that reflect who you want to be. You just buy what you can afford and wear it until it falls apart.” Says Grey. “Yes.” You say. “Ok, so today we’re going to curate some looks for you that will hopefully help you reflect the person you know you can be, but might not be yet.” Says Grey. “A change on the outside can often help facilitate a change on the inside. And, we can take into consideration that you have limited funds for clothing shopping. So we’re going to stick with staple pieces that will last a long time. But also, I want you to use it as a chance to think about and develop your personal style a little bit. Because that’s a skill you are going to need when we go out and start helping people. You need to know what you like and you need to know how to wear it. Sound good?” “Sounds good.” You say. “Great!” Says Grey. “So for our first look we are going to start with a pant. Normally we would pick a neutral colour pant in a cut and a fabric that looks good and feels comfortable. But, if you are a person who loves colour or pattern, that’s an option too. So, here are your choices for pants for this look.” Grey pulls back a blanket on the bed to reveal several pairs of pants laid out neatly in a row. You contemplate them for a moment and then pick: [[A pair of wide leg sweat pants in pale pink with a dark pink stripe and a dark red stripe running down the outside of the leg.|Sweat pants]] [[A pair of colour-blocked dark blue jeans with a light blue colour panel at the top and a dramatically flared, slightly cropped leg.|Blue jeans]] [[A pair of dark blue-grey hip hugger leggings with a button closure, contour waistband and slim, streamlined zippered side pockets.|Leggings]]

''Comfort before Style (Jeans and a sweater all the way, everyday).'' “I wear jeans and a sweater everyday.” You admit, feeling a bit worried. Grey seems like a formidable teacher, strict and straight forward. “So, even when you go to work, it’s jeans and a sweater?” “Yes.” You say. “Sometimes, I wear like a shirt with a Peter Pan collar underneath to dress it up.” Grey raises her eyebrows at you. “So, casual is your best look.” She says. “Yeesss?” You agree tentatively. Grey smiles and puts a hand on her hip. “I love a good, sturdy jean.” She says. “I do think they have a place in your wardrobe. But I don’t think you want to wear the same thing everyday and I’ll tell you why. What we wear on the outside is often a reflection of how we feel on the inside. When you just wear the same old thing every day, it tells me that something is blocked on the inside. We’re not growing. We’re not moving forward. We’re stalled. And what we want to be doing is always moving forward. If you never take any risks, you will never get to where you want to be. Do you know where you want to be?” You are taken aback by her question but you pause a moment to consider it. [[“I’ve always struggled to find what I really want to do, so I just take whatever comes along.”]] [[“I want to work in the arts, one way or another, and I’m willing to take risks to get where I want to be.”]] [[“I have a hard time focusing on where I want to be because of where I currently am.”]]

''“I love a good vintage thrift shop find.”'' “Me too!” Says Grey. “But you have to be intentional about putting looks together when you are going to go mostly Vintage. Real vintage is hard to find at regular thrift shops. So you have to look a bit harder to see if you can really find what you are looking for instead of just settling on something you don’t want. Because you don’t save any money that way either.” “Well, the options are limited in this city.” You say. “We have two basic thrift shop chains and that’s it. There are a couple of boutique thrift shops where you can get real vintage stuff but they are pretty pricey.” Grey nods. “That’s why you have to carefully curate your wardrobe. Build it up slowly. Be really intentional about the things you choose.” “It’s tough.” You say. “No one wants to see me running around naked!” Grey laughs. “No, but you can also fill out your wardrobe with a few staple pieces and work in capsules. Have you heard of a capsule wardrobe?” You shake your head. “It’s a small combination of pieces that work together to make a variety of combinations. I recommend one capsule for each season, with a few crossover pieces. You know, like a sweater that you might wear in both the spring and the fall.” She says. “I see.” You say. Grey cocks her head and looks at you quizzically. “How do your clothes make you feel?” She asks, abruptly changing the subject. “That’s a good question.” You say. “I mean, I usually pick clothes that cover me up pretty well, so I guess that makes me feel comfortable?” You have never really thought about this before. As a theatre artist, you took your cues from others in your program and gradually an aesthetic emerged that you have stuck to ever since. “What we wear on the outside is often a reflection of how we feel on the inside.” Says Grey. “So, the reverse is also true. If you want to change how you feel on the inside, sometimes it helps to start with a change on the outside. How we look affects how we feel about ourselves more than we think it does. How do you feel about yourself right now?” You look down at your outfit for a moment and consider what she has said. [[“I feel like a creative, competent woman.”]] [[“I feel kind of scattered and untethered.”]] [[“I feel like I play it safe.”]]

''“Thrift shops are what I can afford right now.”'' Grey nods and steps back to get another look at you. “I know a lot of people starting out feel that way.” She says. “But the thing we have to consider is: What we wear on the outside is often a reflection of how we feel on the inside. Even if it is a thrift store find. You want to cultivate a look that reflects, not only how you want to feel on the inside, but how you want people to see you. If you look scattered or sloppily dressed, or if your clothes aren’t in good shape or don’t fit well, it’s harder for people to take you seriously. You just become invisible.” You nod. “I have definitely experienced that.” You say. “So I would encourage you to buy something at a thrift shop only if you really love a piece, and if it is in good shape and fits you well.” Says Grey. “It’s important to be intentional about the look we project out into the world. That’s the first thing people tend to notice about you and it really can affect how you feel about yourself too.” “Well, I shop at thrift shops because I can’t afford very many new clothes.” You say. “So, how do you get around that?” “You buy a few good, staple, pieces and then you save up and expand as you can afford it.” Says Grey. “There are lots of cheaper stores where you can get some solid pieces that will last for a long time. You just have to do some research to see which pieces are the solid things to buy at each chain.” You contemplate this for a moment. “So, do you do research whenever you want to buy a piece of clothing?” You ask. “I do a lot of research.” Says Grey. “Especially when I am helping someone who might be struggling a bit. I want the choices I give them to reflect the person they want to be. I want the clothes to reflect the good things about their personality. And I want them to fit well and flatter their bodies and cover up any problem areas or areas they are uncomfortable with. And I think you’ll find the rest of the team does the same. We want to cater our recommendations to the people we are working with.” “Gosh, and here I just thought I would grab a few products on sale at the pharmacy and kind of wing it.” You say, jokingly. Grey looks at you sternly. “This is not a joking matter.” She says. You nod. “I know. I’m sorry. I’m just, struggling to figure out how I’m going to do this. How I’m going to live up to everyone’s expectations of me.” Grey takes both your hands and pulls you towards her so that you have no choice but to look her in the eye. “The only way to get to where you want to be is to keep moving forward.” She says. “Where is it you want to get to?” [[“I’ve always struggled to find what I really want to do, so I just take whatever comes along.”]] [[“I want to work in the arts, one way or another, and I’m willing to take risks to get where I want to be.”]] [[“I have a hard time focusing on where I want to be because of where I currently am.”]]

''“I feel like a creative, competent woman.”'' Grey nods, steps back and looks at you critically. “Tell me about that.” She says. Your confidence falters. “I just mean.” You start slowly. “I just mean that I look like I know what I’m doing.” Grey nods. “And what are you doing?” She asks. You let out a deep breath and let your shoulders sag. “God, I have no idea.” You say. “I’m a mess.” Grey laughs and puts her hands on her hips. “You are a mess.” She says. “But that’s not the point. You did what you did and look at where you are.” “Seriously.” You agree. “I still can’t believe it.” “Well, we are suckers for a hard luck story.” Says Grey. “Plus, we always want to give people a chance. No one is perfect. People mess up. The important thing is to keep moving forward. That’s the only way to get to where you want. Do you know where you want to get to?” [[“I’ve always struggled to find what I really want to do, so I just take whatever comes along.”]] [[“I want to work in the arts, one way or another, and I’m willing to take risks to get where I want to be.”]] [[“I have a hard time focusing on where I want to be because of where I currently am.”]]

''“I feel kind of scattered and untethered.”'' “I think that’s a reasonable way to feel, all things considered.” Says Grey. You laugh nervously. “It was a risk.” You say. “I’m not sure it was a good one.” Grey nods. “Taking risks is a good thing.” She says. “We want to encourage some risk taking in life. But lying was a different kind of risk.” You nod and look at your feet. “You got lucky.” Says Grey, not letting up. You nod. “I know.” You say. “I’m going to try really hard not to disappoint anyone.” Grey raises her eyebrows at you. “If I can just say something.” She says. You look at her and your heart starts thumping wildly in your chest. You are sure she is about to change her mind and denounce you as a hopeless fraud. You brace yourself for whatever is about to come. “Don’t try not to disappoint anyone.” She says. “Whether or not we are disappointed is not the point. Nor,” she adds, “is it really any of your business. What you need to do is to keep moving forward. That’s the only way to get to where you want. Do you know where you want to get to?” [[“I’ve always struggled to find what I really want to do, so I just take whatever comes along.”]] [[“I want to work in the arts, one way or another, and I’m willing to take risks to get where I want to be.”]] [[“I have a hard time focusing on where I want to be because of where I currently am.”]]

''“I feel like I play it safe.”'' “Except for today, maybe!” Laughs Grey. You blush and look at your feet. “I didn’t think I would get hired, so I didn’t think it would matter what I said on my resume.” You say quietly. Grey nods. “It was a risk.” She says. “I’m not sure it was a good one.” You look up, surprised. “Look, taking risks is a good thing, we want to encourage that in people. People who take risks get closer to what they want than people who never take any risks. But lying, not so much.” Says Grey. You nod. “I mean, I still can’t believe I ended up here, with you, doing this.” You say. Grey nods. “Make the most of it, Kween.” She says. “Not everyone gets as lucky.” You nod. “I know.” You say. “I feel badly about it." “Don’t feel badly.” Says Grey. “Just keep moving forward. That’s the only way to get to where you want. Do you know where you want to get to?” [[“I’ve always struggled to find what I really want to do, so I just take whatever comes along.”]] [[“I want to work in the arts, one way or another, and I’m willing to take risks to get where I want to be.”]] [[“I have a hard time focusing on where I want to be because of where I currently am.”]]

''“I’ve always struggled to find what I really want to do, so I just take whatever comes along.”'' “I think that’s how it is for a lot of young people.” Says Grey. “Most people don’t know right away what they want to do. You have to try lots of different things, and fail a lot, to figure it out.” “I guess it just feels like I’m not getting anywhere.” You say. “It’s just the same, dull thing every dull day.” Grey nods and holds up a pair of bright blue leopard print jeggings. You feel your eyes go wide. “I don’t think I can pull those off.” You say. “How do you know unless you try?” Asks Grey. “Ok. That’s fair.” You say. “I’ll give anything a shot once.” Grey grins at you. “That’s a good attitude to have. Find a way to move forward that you can feel proud of afterwards.” She says, pulling a long, asymmetrical, ice blue tunic off a rack. You look at the outfit apprehensively. “Are you sure this is the way to go here? I’m supposed to be a Self-Care Stylist, not a throw back from the 60s.” Grey gasps in mock offense. “Don’t knock the 60s.” She says. “They had already figured out what it took the rest of us years to understand. Making a visible change on the outside can lead to change on the inside. But maybe you're right.” She hangs the tunic back up. "So, instead of me picking for you, why don't we curate some looks for you that will help you reflect the person you know you can be, but might not be yet.” Says Grey. “Sounds good.” You say. “Great!” Says Grey. “So for our first look we are going to start with a pant. Normally we would pick a neutral colour pant in a cut and a fabric that looks good and feels comfortable. But, if you are a person who loves colour or pattern, that’s an option too. So, here are your choices for pants for this look.” Grey pulls back a blanket on the bed to reveal several pairs of pants laid out neatly in a row. You contemplate them for a moment and then pick: [[A pair of wide leg sweat pants in pale pink with a dark pink stripe and a dark red stripe running down the outside of the leg.|Sweat pants]] [[A pair of colour-blocked dark blue jeans with a light blue colour panel at the top and a dramatically flared, slightly cropped leg.|Blue jeans]] [[A pair of dark blue-grey hip hugger leggings with a button closure, contour waistband and slim, streamlined zippered side pockets.|Leggings]]

''“I want to work in the arts, one way or another, and I’m willing to take risks to get where I want to be.”'' “That’s a great attitude to have.” Says Grey. “But if taking risks means lying, I think you might have to rethink it.” You look down at your feet, embarrassed. “So, why did you lie?” She asks. You look up to find her smiling earnestly at you. “It’s just so hard to get a foot in the door.” You say. “There aren’t any opportunities for someone with not much experience and I thought it was a harmless way to speed up the process.” You feel a little flame of determination flare inside your chest. “I’m a talented person.” You say. “I know I can be great. But no one will give you a chance unless you already have experience." “What did you think was going to happen here?” Asks Grey. “How were you planning to pull off the job without experience?” You shrug. “Honestly, I didn’t think I would get the job so I didn’t think about it.” You say. “But, I guess, I thought I could study at home and learn as I went along. Fly by the seat of my pants.” Grey grins at you. “Well, I’m glad you decided to come clean.” She says. “Because that plan would have certainly ended in disaster for all of us.” You nod, but inside you wonder if you could have actually pulled it off and spared yourself all this awkwardness. “Trust me.” Says Grey. “It’s always better to figure out what you want and find a way to get there that you can be proud of. Today is a good example of that. Do you think you will be proud of how you handled things today, in the long run?” You shrug. “I guess it depends on whether or not it works out.” You say honestly. “It’ll work out.” Says Grey confidently. "So, today, why don't we curate some looks for you that will help you reflect the person you know you can be, but might not be yet.” Says Grey. “Sounds good.” You say. “Great!” Says Grey. “So for our first look we are going to start with a pant. Normally we would pick a neutral colour pant in a cut and a fabric that looks good and feels comfortable. But, if you are a person who loves colour or pattern, that’s an option too. So, here are your choices for pants for this look.” Grey pulls back a blanket on the bed to reveal several pairs of pants laid out neatly in a row. You contemplate them for a moment and then pick: [[A pair of wide leg sweat pants in pale pink with a dark pink stripe and a dark red stripe running down the outside of the leg.|Sweat pants]] [[A pair of colour-blocked dark blue jeans with a light blue colour panel at the top and a dramatically flared, slightly cropped leg.|Blue jeans]] [[A pair of dark blue-grey hip hugger leggings with a button closure, contour waistband and slim, streamlined zippered side pockets.|Leggings]]

''“I have a hard time focusing on where I want to be because of where I currently am.”'' “Tell me more about that.” Says Grey. You sigh. “Well, I have to be able to pay the bills.” You say, feeling a bit choked up. “But there aren’t that many options for someone who studied acting in college. Especially now. That’s why I lied to get this job. It seemed like it could be a way forward, maybe.” Grey nods. “I’ve never really had a job I liked before, let alone loved.” You press on. “And I would really like to find that, you know, sort of calling or feeling that you were meant to be doing this thing, but then I end up working jobs that are not very fulfilling or where I’m the least talented person in the room, and I just end up feeling kind of depressed about it all. Like my life is never going to go anywhere.” “I’m going to stop you right there.” Says Grey. “We all go through tough times like that. Times of uncertainty or times when you feel like you are not where you want to be. But lying to get what you want can only hurt you in the long run.” You nod. “What’s better than lying is learning to listen to your own thoughts so you can figure out what you want and also, a way to get there that you can be proud of.” “That’s really good advice.” You say thoughtfully. Grey smiles. “Thanks.” She agrees. “So, today we’re going to shake up the look a bit on the outside, so we can get clearer on the inside.” “I’m a bit nervous.” You admit. Grey winks at you and holds up a pair of dark blue leopard print jeggings. “All part of the plan, kid.” She says. "So, we're going to curate some looks for you that will help you reflect the person you know you can be, but might not be yet.” Says Grey. “Sounds good.” You say. “Great!” Says Grey, putting the jeggings back with a shake of her head. “For our first look we are going to start with a pant. Normally we would pick a neutral colour pant in a cut and a fabric that looks good and feels comfortable. But, if you are a person who loves colour or pattern, that’s an option too. So, here are your choices for pants for this look.” Grey pulls back a blanket on the bed to reveal several pairs of pants laid out neatly in a row. You contemplate them for a moment and then pick: [[A pair of wide leg sweat pants in pale pink with a dark pink stripe and a dark red stripe running down the outside of the leg.|Sweat pants]] [[A pair of colour-blocked dark blue jeans with a light blue colour panel at the top and a dramatically flared, slightly cropped leg.|Blue jeans]] [[A pair of dark blue-grey hip hugger leggings with a button closure, contour waistband and slim, streamlined zippered side pockets.|Leggings]]

''A pair of wide leg sweat pants in pale pink with a dark pink stripe and a dark red stripe running down the outside of the leg.'' “Normally, I advise people to stay away from a sweat pant, because it’s not a look that should be paraded in public.” Says Grey. “But these are a really structural, stepped up, dressy version of a sweat pant. And I love a pop of colour.” She hands you the pants and motions towards a small closet. “So, put those on and then we’ll work on picking a top that complements it.” Says Grey. You look at the pants dubiously. They are like nothing you have ever worn before. “Don’t be scared.” Says Grey. “We’re just going to take it one step at a time. You can make almost anything work for you if you put some deliberate thought into it. We’re just going to work at the look until we have found something that works.” You nod and step into the closet. A moment later, you emerge again wearing the pants. Grey pulls you gently over to the full- length mirror near the bed and looks at your reflection critically. “Good.” She says approvingly. “I think the wide leg is very flattering for your body shape.” You look at yourself in the mirror and smile. The pants look good. They are way more pink than you would ever normally choose, but they are very tailored looking. You can see how they could work in a number of different combinations. “Right.” Says Grey. “So now, you need to pick a top to go with them. Can I advise something neutral, so that the focus of the outfit is the pant? Unless you are comfortable with a bold use of colour, in which case, go nuts.” She pulls another blanket off the bed revealing three tops laid out neatly just above the pants. You take a minute to mull over your choices. [[A dark purple-black collarless blouse in a sheer viscose fabric. The fit is loose and flowy and the sleeves are accented by a very skinny white strip and a very skinny deep red stripe running around the edge of the buttoned cuff.|Purple blouse]] [[An oversized ombre oxford shirt. The ombre colour transitions from a deep red-black at the bottom to a warm grey across the shoulders.|Oxford shirt]] [[A dark grey, ribbed, mock turtle-neck.|Turtle neck]]

''A pair of colour-blocked dark blue jeans with a light blue colour panel at the top and a dramatically flared, slightly cropped leg.'' “This is such a great pant.” Says Grey. “I love how much more interesting they are than just a normal jean. Plus, the lighter colour-blocking at the top and waist pulls the eye in and draws it down to the dramatically flared leg and that makes it easier to hide problem areas in both the midriff and the leg.” You hold the pants up to yourself to check the look. Grey guides you gently towards a small closet. “So, put those on and then we’ll work on picking a top that complements it.” Says Grey. You nod uncertainly. The pants are really much more flared than you have ever worn before. “Don’t be scared.” Says Grey. “We’re just going to take it one step at a time. You can make almost anything work for you if you put some deliberate thought into it. We’re just going to work at the look until we have found something that works and that you feel good in.” “Ok.” You say, stepping into the closet. A moment later, you emerge again wearing the pants. Grey pulls you gently over to the full- length mirror near the bed and looks at your reflection critically. “Nice.” She says. “What do you think?” You look at yourself appraisingly. Surprisingly, the flared leg doesn’t make you look like a hippie as you feared. In fact, the pants make you look taller and more poised than you have ever seen yourself. “I think they look good.” You say, a bit breathlessly. “I’m surprised because I thought flared legs were out.” Grey nods. “In lots of cases they are.” She says. “But this is a really structured, really well-made pair of jeans and the flare adds a lot of structural interest.” You have no idea what she means but you nod anyway. Grey laughs and pulls another blanket off the bed revealing three tops laid out neatly just above the pants. “So now, you need to pick a top to go with them.” She says. “These are a relatively neutral pant, so you can pick something with a pop of colour or you can go more neutral, it’s up to you.” You take a minute to look over the choices. [[A dark purple-black collarless blouse in a sheer viscose fabric. The fit is loose and flowy and the sleeves are accented by a very skinny white strip and a very skinny deep red stripe running around the edge of the buttoned cuff.|Purple blouse]] [[An oversized ombre oxford shirt. The ombre colour transitions from a deep red-black at the bottom to a warm grey across the shoulders.|Oxford shirt]] [[A dark grey, ribbed, mock turtle-neck.|Turtle neck]]

''A pair of dark blue-grey hip hugger leggings with a button closure, contour waistband and slim, streamlined zippered side pockets.'' “These are my favourite legging.” Says Grey. “Normally I don’t advise a legging for work, but these are more like a stretchy comfortable trouser. I love the structured waist band and the zippered pockets.” She holds the pants up as she points out the details. “Even though blue is normally considered a cool colour, the mix of grey with the blue makes these pants a really warm, inviting colour, and it will help to pull the outfit together once you’ve picked a top to go with them.” She passes you the pants and guides you gently towards a small closet. “They look pretty tight.” You say unsure of your choice now that you are expected to actually try them on. “Don’t worry.” Says Grey. “They are very tailored and structured for a legging and they are going to look great!” You nod uncertainly. “Don’t be worried.” Says Grey. “We’re just going to take it one step at a time. We’ll work on the look until we have found something that works and that you feel good in.” “Ok.” You say, stepping into the closet. A moment later, you emerge again wearing the pants. Grey pulls you gently over to the full- length mirror near the bed and looks at your reflection and gives a satisfied nod. “I know what I think.” She says. “But what do you think?” You look at yourself appraisingly. You are surprised at how good the pants look and how comfortable they are to wear. “Actually, I really like them.” You say. “They look professional and kind of, I don’t know, deliberate. Like I might know what I’m doing.” You struggle to explain your thoughts. Grey nods. “Well made clothes always look put together in an intentional way.” She says. “And that helps us come off as professional. The lines these pants create make your legs look longer and your hips look slimmer than they actually are which makes your body look well proportioned.” You peer at your reflection, struggling to see what Grey is seeing. “You know so much about this.” You say. “Fashion and putting looks together.” Grey nods. “I do.” She says. “But you are the one putting this look together. I just picked out the choices, which you could have done also if you had gone into any good clothing store.” You turn around to look at yourself at every angle in the mirror. “Ok.” You say. “I’m in love with these pants!” “Great!” Says Grey. “Now, you need to pick a top to go with them.” She pulls back a second blanket revealing three tops laid out neatly just above the pants. “These are a nice, neutral pant, so you can pick something with a pop of colour, you can go with something more neutral, you can pick something long and flowy, it’s up to you.” You take a minute to look over the choices. [[A dark purple-black collarless blouse in a sheer viscose fabric. The fit is loose and flowy and the sleeves are accented by a very skinny white strip and a very skinny deep red stripe running around the edge of the buttoned cuff.|Purple blouse]] [[An oversized ombre oxford shirt. The ombre colour transitions from a deep red-black at the bottom to a warm grey across the shoulders.|Oxford shirt]] [[A dark grey, ribbed, mock turtle-neck.|Turtle neck]]

''A dark purple-black collarless blouse in a sheer viscose fabric. The fit is loose and flowy and the sleeves are accented by a very skinny white strip and a very skinny deep red stripe running around the edge of the buttoned cuff.'' “Good choice!” Says Grey. “Because the top is a little bit A-line and flowy, it draws attention away from any problem areas in the middle that you might want to hide.” You give her a meaningful look. “Not that I think you have anything to hide.” She says with a laugh. “But this top adds visual interest because of the fabric and breaks up the silhouette a bit and that’s helpful for any body shape.” You look at yourself in the mirror. You look neat, professional and put together. You smile, happy with the way you look for once. “It looks like you are starting to feel better about this.” Says Grey. “Yes.” You say. “I’m starting to see how I might use some of the tricks you are teaching me in fashion but with self-care.” “Right?” Says Grey. “The medium might be different but the principles are the same. So, we’re just going to pick out one more piece to complete the look. And this time I’m going to give you a bit more responsibility. You can pick out a jacket or an overshirt or a pair of shoes that you think would complement the look. Your choice.” Grey pulls back the last blanket on the bed, revealing a selection of shoes and several jackets. You look at yourself in the mirror again and then pick: [[A low-cut white leather sneaker with a dark red-black stripe around the toe.|Leather sneaker]] [[A deep blue-grey patent leather ankle boot, with elastic sides and a slender block heel.|Ankle boot]] [[A velvet slip-on sneaker in a deep mauve-grey.|Velvet sneaker]] [[A thigh length brushed wool, funnel-necked coat in a warm earthy grey.|Grey coat]] [[A short, canvas utility jacket in Hunter Green with a standing collar and cinched waist.|Utility jacket]] [[A warm dark blue double knit blazer with a notched collar, button cuffs, vented back and front welt pockets.|Blazer]]

''An oversized ombre oxford shirt. The ombre colour transitions from a deep red-black at the bottom to a warm grey across the shoulders.'' “Normally I wouldn’t have chosen an ombre shirt because ombre has been done to death.” Says Grey. “But this one has such a nice colour transition and because the shirt is oversized and you can wear it casually, unbuttoned a bit at the top, or more formally, it is a good choice for a capsule wardrobe. Plus a bit of colour can be fun.” “The world would be pretty boring if we just wore grey and black and dark blue all the time.” You agree. “Yes.” Say Grey. “Those are all good base colours. But we want to complement those colours with something that will add a bit of visual interest. These colours are not too bright, and they do a good job of adding a nice touch of colour to the look without overwhelming it.” You look yourself over in the mirror. “I love how it’s oversized but it still looks kind of fitted.” You say. “That’s because it’s a deliberate choice.” Says Grey. “And a really well-made shirt. It frames the shoulders really nicely, which is important.” You turn around slowly, examining your reflection from every angle. You look good, you think. Like a professional. “It looks like you might be starting to feel good about this.” Says Grey. “Yes.” You say. “I’m starting to see how these same tricks might be used to help people have better self-care.” “Right?” Says Grey. “The medium might be different but the principles are the same.” “Exactly.” You agree. “Ok.” Says Grey briskly. “We’re just going to pick out one more piece to complete the look. And this time I’m going to give you a bit more responsibility. You can pick out a jacket or an overshirt or a pair of shoes that you think would complement the look.” Grey pulls back the last blanket on the bed, revealing a selection of shoes and several jackets. You look at yourself in the mirror again and then pick: [[A low-cut white leather sneaker with a dark red-black stripe around the toe.|Leather sneaker]] [[A deep blue-grey patent leather ankle boot, with elastic sides and a slender block heel.|Ankle boot]] [[A velvet slip-on sneaker in a deep mauve-grey.|Velvet sneaker]] [[A thigh length brushed wool, funnel-necked coat in a warm earthy grey.|Grey coat]] [[A short, canvas utility jacket in Hunter Green with a standing collar and cinched waist.|Utility jacket]] [[A warm dark blue double knit blazer with a notched collar, button cuffs, vented back and front welt pockets.|Blazer]]

''A dark grey, ribbed, mock turtle-neck.'' “Great choice!” Says Grey. “Because this top is ribbed, it hides any problem areas around the midriff nicely. You can’t go wrong with a simple, dark top. It’s a good staple for a capsule wardrobe.” You look at yourself in the mirror. You look fresh and professional but also a little bit funky which makes you smile. “So, it seems like you are starting to feel better about this.” Says Grey. “Yes.” You say. “I’m starting to see how I might use some of the tricks you are teaching me to actually pull off this Self-Care Stylist gig!” “Great!” Says Grey. “So, we’re just going to pick out one more piece to complete the look. And this time I’m going to give you a bit more responsibility. You can pick out a jacket or an overshirt or a pair of shoes that you think would complement the look. Your choice.” Grey pulls back the last blanket on the bed, revealing a selection of shoes and several jackets. You look at yourself in the mirror again and then pick: [[A low-cut white leather sneaker with a dark red-black stripe around the toe.|Leather sneaker]] [[A deep blue-grey patent leather ankle boot, with elastic sides and a slender block heel.|Ankle boot]] [[A velvet slip-on sneaker in a deep mauve-grey.|Velvet sneaker]] [[A thigh length brushed wool, funnel-necked coat in a warm earthy grey.|Grey coat]] [[A short, canvas utility jacket in Hunter Green with a standing collar and cinched waist.|Utility jacket]] [[A warm dark blue double knit blazer with a notched collar, button cuffs, vented back and front welt pockets.|Blazer]]

''A low-cut white leather sneaker with a dark red-black stripe around the toe.'' “A shoe is a really good way to complete a look.” Says Grey. “Sometimes people just throw something on their feet as an afterthought, but the feet are just as important as the rest of the body. Plus, a great pair of shoes can draw the eye away from areas you are trying to hide.” You look at your new look in the mirror and smile. You look good. Like someone who has their life together. “So.” Says Grey. “I told you before that changing the outside sometimes helps us figure out what we have on the inside. How has this session changed you? What have you learned that you can take with you and use in your role as Self-Care Stylist?” [[“Find a way forward you can be proud of.”]] [[“Making a change on the outside can lead to a change on the inside.”]]

''A deep blue-grey patent leather ankle boot, with elastic sides and a slender block heel.'' “I love a blocked heal.” Says Grey. You look at your new look in the mirror and smile. You look good. Like someone who has their life together. Grey looks at your reflection in the mirror and nods approvingly. “Sometimes people just throw something on their feet as an afterthought, but the feet are just as important as the rest of the body.” She says. “Plus, a great pair of shoes can draw the eye away from areas you are trying to hide.” “Like, what’s on the inside?” You say jokingly. Grey smiles. “It’s true that making a change on the outside can help us figure out what we have on the inside.” She says. “How has this session changed you? What have you learned that you can take with you and use in your role as Self-Care Stylist?” [[“Find a way forward you can be proud of.”]] [[“Making a change on the outside can lead to a change on the inside.”]]

''A velvet slip-on sneaker in a deep mauve-grey.'' “Such a good basic shoe, but because it is velvet, it has an interesting texture and feels a bit more chic than just a regular slip-on sneaker.” Says Grey. “Take a look at yourself and tell me what you see.” You take a long look at yourself in the mirror. “I see someone who has their life together.” You say. “A creative professional.” Grey nods approvingly. “So.” Says Grey. “I told you before that changing the outside sometimes helps us figure out what we have on the inside. How has this session changed you? What have you learned that you can take with you and use in your role as Self-Care Stylist?” [[“Find a way forward you can be proud of.”]] [[“Making a change on the outside can lead to a change on the inside.”]]

''A thigh length brushed wool, funnel-necked coat in a warm earthy grey''. “A coat or an overshirt is a great way to tie a look together.” Says Grey. “Plus, because the look works without the over layer, you can take it off for a very different look if you want to. Or change it for a different jacket or shirt and have another, different look. That’s the power of the capsule wardrobe.” You take a good long look at yourself in the mirror. “You look really good.” Says Grey. “How are you feeling?” “Better.” You say. “When I look at myself in the mirror, I see a person who has her life together. A creative professional. And I like that. That makes me feel more confident that I can do this. That, even though it will be hard and a lot of work, I can do it.” Grey nods. “So.” Says Grey. “I told you before that changing something on the outside sometimes helps us figure out what we have on the inside. How has this session changed you? What have you learned that you can take with you and use in your role as Self-Care Stylist?” [[“Find a way forward you can be proud of.”]] [[“Making a change on the outside can lead to a change on the inside.”]]

''A short, canvas utility jacket in Hunter Green with a standing collar and cinched waist.'' “This is a great coat!” Says Grey, turning you around. “I love the cinched waist at the back. It gives the jacket such a nice shape. Take a look.” You look at yourself in the mirror. “Wow.” You say. “I look like a professional; like someone who has her life together.” Grey nods. “And how does that make you feel?” She asks. “Like I can do this.” You say. “I know it will be a lot of work and I feel like I have just tons to learn, but looking at myself right now, I feel confident I can do it.” “Great!” Says Grey approvingly. “I told you before that changing something on the outside sometimes helps us figure out what we have on the inside. How has this session changed you? What have you learned that you can take with you and use in your role as Self-Care Stylist?” [[“Find a way forward you can be proud of.”]] [[“Making a change on the outside can lead to a change on the inside.”]]

''A warm dark blue double knit blazer with a notched collar, button cuffs, vented back and front welt pockets.'' “A nice, fitted blazer is always a solid choice.” Says Grey. “Especially for work. But it’s casual enough and a relaxed enough fabric that you could wear it casually as well.” You nod and turn around slowly in front of the mirror, watching your reflection. “I like it.” You say. “The whole look. It looks…creative but still professional. Like I know what I’m doing with my life.” Grey nods. “Plus, I always find people’s posture changes when I put them in a blazer.” She says. “It’s a piece of clothing that demands that we stand up straight and throw our shoulders back and shout our confidence to the world.” You nod. “Yeah, that’s exactly how I feel.” You say. “I feel confident. I know this is going to be hard work and I have just tons to learn about everything. But looking at myself, the clothes make me look confident and put together so I feel confident and put together.” Grey reaches out and takes your upper arms in her hands. She looks straight into your eyes. “Excellent!” She says. “Didn’t I tell you that changing something on the outside can help us figure out what we have on the inside? How has this session changed you? What have you learned that you can take with you and use in your role as Self-Care Stylist?” [[“Find a way forward you can be proud of.”]] [[“Making a change on the outside can lead to a change on the inside.”]]

(set: $find_forward to true) ''“Find a way forward you can be proud of.”'' “Great!” Says Grey. “That’s a great step towards good self-care, and also self-awareness. We can’t care for ourselves if we have never learned to listen to ourselves.” “That makes sense.” You say, smiling. “Now, let’s talk about make-up.” Says Grey. You groan. “It’s part of the job and you have to at least have thought about it before you advise someone else, alright?” You nod. Grey pulls out a small bag filled with brushes, lotions and powders. “I usually do a lot of make-up because I am cultivating a particular look that is very intentional.” She says. “But, for you, and most of our Stars, I think you should keep it simple. A high-quality moisturizer, a bit of foundation and maybe a touch of mascara or a bit of eye shadow and you’re good to go.” She hands you the makeup bag. “I want you to experiment with the products in this bag and actually try to find what works for you.” She says. You look at all the products in the bag and feel your heart rate speed up in a panic. Grey reaches over and wraps her hands around yours, forcing you to look at her. “I can see you’re panicking so I’ll make it really easy for you.” She reaches into the bag and pulls out two tubs of moisturizer. “Ok, this one,” she holds up a shiny red tub with a rounded bottom, “is a very light gel-style moisturizer with some anti-aging properties and this one,” she holds up a squat light beige tub, “has a high concentration of Hyaluronic Acid in it which helps with dryness and redness but it’s a bit on the heavy side. Which would work best for you?” [[“The red tub.”]] [[“The beige tub.”]]

(set: $change_outside to true) ''“Making a change on the outside can lead to a change on the inside.”'' "That's a great Self-Care principle." Says Grey approvingly."So, now we've got the look sorted out, what I really think we need to focus on is make-up." She reaches into a small, floral make up bag and pulling out a handful of tubs and tubes. You groan. “Listen.” Says Grey sharply. “It’s part of the job and you have to at least have thought about it before you advise someone else. This is what I meant before when I said things weren’t going to be easy and you would have to work hard.” “Sorry.” You say. “I’m really grateful to you guys for helping me. I’m just terrible at make-up.” “Really.” She asks. It is not a question. “What do you know about make-up?” She asks. “Not much.” You admit. “I mean, I know how to apply basic colouring for stage acting, but besides that, not much.” “So, that’s one of the things you are going to have to learn about fast.” Says Grey. “Luckily, simple and natural is almost always best, and once you understand the basics, you can start experimenting with products until you find the ones you prefer. That, at least, will give you a solid base to start from.” Grey holds out two small tubs and motions for you to take them. “When I do make-up for other people, I always start with a really good moisturizer, which I mix with a bit of foundation. And sometimes that’s all you need to do.” You glance down at the tubs in your hands. One is a moisturizer with hyaluronic acid and the other is a light foundation with a bit of sparkle. “I think you should start with these, and then build from there.” Says Grey. “Do you think you can do that?” You nod and tuck the tubs into your bag. Grey hands you the floral make-up case. “So, your homework is to experiment with the products in this bag and discover what actually works for you. Once you know how that process works, you’ll be able to help other people follow the same process to discover what works for them.” “Thank you. I will.” You say. “Where are you off to next?” Asks Grey. (if: $therapy_mag and $design_robbie and $organize_kerry and $food_toni and $fashion_grey is true)[ [[You step outside into the late afternoon light.]]](else:)[ [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]]

''“The red tub.”'' “Awesome!” Says Grey. “This is my favourite all purpose moisturizer. It’s light and creamy and it will really help improve the texture of your skin.” She pulls a tube of foundation out of the make-up bag. “I usually mix it with a bit of this liquid foundation and apply them both together, with a brush.” She hands you a very soft bristled face brush with a polished wooden handle. “Sometimes, if I’m in a hurry, this is all I do for make-up in the morning.” “But that’s so easy.” You say. “I always thought applying make-up was complicated and time consuming.” “It can be if you choose to make it complicated and time-consuming.” Says Grey. “But a light, natural look is usually better. When I have a bit more time, I use a little bit of mascara as well and that’s my look for the day.” “Huh.” You say. “Ok. I think I can work with that.” “Good.” Says Grey handing you the make-up bag. “So, your homework is to experiment with the products in this kit. Play around with them and decide what you like and why. It’s easier to help others figure this stuff out when you’ve spent some time really thinking about these things.” “I can see that.” You say. You tuck the bag under your arm and jot down Grey’s instructions in your phone so you don’t forget. “Where are you off to next?” She asks. (if: $therapy_mag and $design_robbie and $organize_kerry and $food_toni and $fashion_grey is true)[ [[You step outside into the late afternoon light.]]](else:)[ [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]]

''“The beige tub.”'' “Good.” Says Grey. “So after you wash your face, this is your first step. You rub this in.” You look at the little beige tub of lotion in your hand. “It’s not about how fancy the products are.” Says Grey. “It’s about being intentional. Everything you wear, every product you use, should be intentional.” You nod. “I think I’m starting to get it.” You say. “That’s great!” Says Grey. “So, your homework is, to take this bag and experiment with the products inside. Do a bit of research and decide what you would use and why. You can’t advise someone else without at least knowing what works for you.” “Ok.” You say. “I will. Thanks.” You tuck the bag under your arm and jot down Grey’s instructions in your phone so you don’t forget. “Where are you off to next?” Grey asks. (if: $therapy_mag and $design_robbie and $organize_kerry and $food_toni and $fashion_grey is true)[ [[You step outside into the late afternoon light.]]](else:)[ [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]]

''“I want to do something that helps other people have better lives.”'' “That’s a noble goal.” Says Magenta. “But first, you might have to take a good hard look at your own life.” She looks at you pointedly. “I mean, right now, your life is a bit of a mess. So why is your focus on other people?” This is one of the toughest conversations you have ever had with someone, you reflect. “I don’t know.” You say. “I guess, I want my life to be bigger than it is.” “Sometimes, when things aren’t working in our lives, or something feels off, it seems easier to focus our energy outwards rather than inwards. But this is an inside job, Vanessa. You can’t run away from that forever.” “Oh.” You say, just to fill the silence. “Let’s pretend that this is the first day of your adult life.” Says Magenta. “You’ve been handed a huge opportunity, but the only way you can be successful is if you set aside your idea of what your life should be and start taking action that will make your life what you want it to be. You need to find your authentic self. Because up to now, you’ve just been playing a role and that’s not going to work on this show. We have to show all the way up for the people we are trying to help. It’s the only way this is going to work. So right now, what do you really want.” You think for a moment. “I want to be a great Self-Care Stylist.” You say. “Good. So here are the things you have to remember: Start where you are, always grab a chance, and focus on what you can do, not what you can’t do.” Says Magenta. “Which one will be your mantra in your role as Self-Care Stylist?” [[Start where you are and build on that.]] [[Always grab a chance.]] [[Focus on what you CAN do, not on what you don’t yet know you can do.]]

''“I want to be famous.”'' “Ok.” Says Magenta. “Let’s unpack that for a minute. When you say you want to be famous, what does that mean? Famous in what way?” You shrug, feeling embarrassed with your choice. “I don’t know.” You say. “I guess, I want people to know who I am. I want to feel like I’m not just some face in the crowd. Like my life is bigger than me.” “Interesting.” Says Magenta. “You know it’s not always easy being famous. It opens your life up to scrutiny and judgement in a way that most people never have to deal with.” “Yeah.” You say. “I know it’s not always a good thing, but I also think that being famous would push me to do the things I think I can do but I’m too afraid to try. Or maybe just be a better person in general.” “Well, I can’t argue with being a better person in general.” Laughs Magenta. “So, do you think being a successful part of this show would give you the fame you need to push you to become that person you want to be?” “Yes.” You say. “I think that’s why I did everything I did today. Right now, in my life, I’m really not accountable to anyone. I live alone. I don’t have a partner or kids or pets. I am invisible. And I don’t think I am my best self when I feel invisible. It just makes me feel hopeless. But, I want to be accountable to someone and I want to do work that means something.” “Do you think you can do a good job on this show?” Asks Magenta. “Or are you looking for something else.” “I do think I can do a good job.” You say. “It’s not my area of expertise maybe, but it’s a chance, somewhere to start. And I do know that I am a fast learner. When you are the bottom of the pile, you have to be a fast learner or you just get left behind.” “I always say: Grab a chance. What do you have to lose?” Says Magenta. “All you can do is start where you are and keep moving forward. See where you end up.” “Hopefully, not on the bottom of the heap!” You laugh. “I can see the potential in you.” She says. “That’s why I helped you today. But now it’s up to you to make the most of this chance.” “I’m so, so grateful.” You clasp your hands in front of your chest in a gesture you hope denotes gratitude. “Good.” Says Magenta, cupping your hands in her own. “So, What’s your take away from this conversation? What’s the thing you will bring to your role as Self-Care Stylist?” [[Start where you are and build on that.]] [[Always grab a chance.]] [[Focus on what you CAN do, not on what you don’t yet know you can do.]]

''“I want to do something that I really enjoy.”'' “Ok.” Says Magenta. “What do you really enjoy?” “I don’t really know.” You admit. “I haven’t done enough in my life yet to know, I guess.” “Well, what have you done in your life?” You think about it for a moment. “Not much.” You admit. “Mostly theatre stuff, but I’m a terrible actor.” “Why did you choose theatre then?” Asks Magenta. “I love everything about being in a theatre!” You exclaim. “I like the feeling of the lights on my face, I like the smell of paint and dust. I like the design of the sets and costumes. I love rehearsing. I love working with other people who are so much more talented than me. I love the audience reactions. All of it. I’m not a good actor but I love being on stage. I love being part of an ‘experience’ like that.” “So, in a way, this job is perfect.” Says Magenta. “It’s all the things you love without the pressure of having to act a part.” You sigh. “Except, I lied, so isn’t that like acting a part?” You ask. Magenta looks at you thoughtfully. “Yes. You lied. But from where I’m sitting it also looks like you embraced what you had and decided to build on that. You must have believed you could do this job.” She says. “Otherwise why would you have come?” “That’s fair.” You say. “I do think I can do this job.” “Great!” Says Magenta. “Then my advice is to start where you are and build as you go. You gotta be you, one way or another and if you don’t know who that is yet then this is a way to force yourself to find out. There’s no better motivator than the threat of public humiliation. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other.” “Always grab a chance.” You say. “And you won’t be sorry for a might-have-been.” Finishes Magenta. “I’m a big Arthur Ransome fan too.” “I don’t know how I can ever thank you for everything you’ve done for me today.” You say sincerely. Magenta puts her arm around your shoulders and gives them an encouraging squeeze. “Just remember what you’ve learned and build on that.” She says. “What’s your take away from this conversation? What’s the thing you will bring to your role as Self-Care Stylist?” [[Start where you are and build on that.]] [[Always grab a chance.]] [[Focus on what you CAN do, not on what you don’t yet know you can do.]]

(set: $start_are to true) ''Start where you are and build on that.'' “Great!” Says Magenta. “It’s better just to start from where you are and keep moving forward. Just one foot in front of the other. And say yes to everything you can. You can’t get stuck if you keep moving forward.” “That’s a good point.” You say. “I think I have felt stuck for so long because I just haven’t moved at all. I’ve been stagnant.” “Right.” Says Magenta. “So, from now on, just keep moving forward. You might make some mistakes and not everything will work the way you think it should, but if you keep moving forward and building on what you have, you can’t help but get somewhere!” “I’m going to really try to remember that.” You tell her gratefully. “I know you will.” She says. “So, where are you off to now?” (if: $therapy_mag and $design_robbie and $organize_kerry and $food_toni and $fashion_grey is true)[ [[You step outside into the late afternoon light.]]](else:)[ [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]] [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]]]

(set: $grab_chance to true) ''Always grab a chance'' “That’s a hard one for most people.” Says Magenta. “It’s hard to take that risk and grab a chance when doing what is familiar feels safer.” “No kidding.” You say. Magenta puts her arm around your shoulders and gives them a reassuring squeeze. “You have been really brave today.” She says. “You grabbed a chance. A lot of people would have just sneaked away.” “I thought about it.” You admit. “But look at you now. You’re our first ''Star''. You’re working in Entertainment just like you wanted and you have a chance to do something spectacular.” “If I don’t blow it.” “So don’t blow it.” Says Magenta simply. “You know what you have to do to grab this chance. So grab this chance with both hands. We’ve got your back.” “I really appreciate everything you did for me today.” You say. “These little hiccups make life exciting.” Says Magenta. “I love to see how people deal with adversity. Humans are resilient and resourceful. It’s exciting to see how that plays out. Plus, this gives us a bit of time to get our acts together and find our flow, so it’s really a positive thing.” You marvel at how optimistic she is. Maybe some of it will rub off on you. “So, where are you off to next?” She asks. (if: $therapy_mag and $design_robbie and $organize_kerry and $food_toni and $fashion_grey is true)[ [[You step outside into the late afternoon light.]]](else:)[ [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]] [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]]]

(set: $can_do to true) ''Focus on what you CAN do, not on what you don’t yet know you can do.'' “Awesome!” Says Magenta. “And remember, it’s also about self-confidence. You have to believe you can do what you want to do.” “It’s actually a little bit like improv.” You laugh. “There’s a situation and you just have to go with it until you get out the other side.” “And you want to get out the other side, a better person than when you started.” Magenta agrees. “So, where are you off to now?” (if: $therapy_mag and $design_robbie and $organize_kerry and $food_toni and $fashion_grey is true)[ [[You step outside into the late afternoon light.]]](else:)[ [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]] [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]]]

''“I like a vintage inspired look. Most of what I have comes from thrift stores.”'' “I love vintage too.” Says Robbie. “But sometimes, we have to give vintage pieces a bit of a lift. For example, a horse hair sofa filled with sand is not really practical for a home anymore. Plus, we have fabrics and fillings that will last longer and that are healthier for us. When you pick a piece from a thrift store, what are you looking for?” “Hmmm.” You say, mostly to buy yourself some time. You have never thought much about your furniture choices before. “I guess, I look for a shape I like.” You say tentatively. “And a fabric that is sturdy but has a good texture and maybe a pop of colour.” “See, already, you have some design sensibilities.” Says Robbie. “What about comfort? Is that a consideration? You know, a lot of vintage pieces are not very comfortable.” “Well, no.” You admit. “Most of my furniture is horribly uncomfortable.” “So, that’s something to think about with regards to Self-Care too.” Says Robbie. “If a person’s living space is attractive but not comfortable, how does that make them feel when they spend time in that space?” “Or, they could have the world’s most comfortable couch but it might look dreadful.” You say. “Right, the way our possessions look and feel influence how we feel about ourselves and the space we spend time in.” Says Robbie. “I never thought much about it before.” You say. “But I can see how the way a person looks on the outside and the things they surround themselves with affect how they feel about their lives.” “So, for this space, we are going for a mix of eclectic, casual, and contemporary. But it also has to be comfortable.” Says Robbie. “My first step is to look through magazines and online resources and just pull everything that I love and that strikes me as fitting with the look we are going for. Then I arrange them in groupings on this bulletin board. Want to help me with that?” “That doesn’t seem so hard.” You say, a bit uncertainly. Robbie hands you a stack of magazines and a pair of scissors. “Simple is always better.” Says Robbie. “Plus, simple things tend to stay current for longer. And often you can fix them if they get damaged.” “So fewer things end up in landfill.” You say. “Right.” Says Robbie. “We live in a really consumer driven culture, but lots of people are not very mindful about the things they buy and fill their homes with. If you just take a little bit of time to reflect and think about what you like and why, usually you end up with things that make you happy in the long run.” “That’s good advice.” You say. Robbie grins at you. The two of you sit in companionable silence, cutting things out of magazines and sticking them onto the bulletin board Robbie has placed on the floor in front of you. In your pile, you have placed: [[A contemporary bright floral patterned couch, 2 sea blue wing back chairs in a textured bumpy fabric, and three dark wooden end tables with bare Edison bulb lamps on them.|Floral couch]] [[A throw rug in a colourful geometric pattern, a white, sculptural couch, and several of poofs and foot stools in a variety of textures and shapes.|Throw rug]] [[A long, glass-topped coffee table on large, industrial looking castors, a textured blue couch with removable back rests on long metal pegs, and two arm chairs in brightly coloured geometric patterned fabric.|Coffee table]]

''“I have a few things I love, but I don’t have an overall aesthetic.”'' “A lot of young people find themselves in that situation.” Says Robbie. “We usually get by on hand me downs and curbside finds until we can afford that one thing we really like and then we buy that. But it takes years for our space to be filled with things we love and then, because it is kind of a piecemeal process, there’s a lack of cohesiveness.” “Wow, you just described my whole house!” You say. “I’ve been there.” Says Robbie. “But today, we’re going to play like we have all the money in the world to build a space that will work for our team.” “Ooh, fun.” You say. “I know, right.” Says Robbie, handing you a stack of magazines and a pair of scissors. “So, for this space, we are going for a mix of eclectic, casual, and contemporary. But it also has to be comfortable. My first step is to look through magazines and pull everything that I love and that seems to fit the look we are going for. Then I arrange them in groupings on this bulletin board. So, you’re going to help me with that.” “Ok.” You say, a bit uncertainly. “Just cut out the things you like. And then we’ll try to arrange them into ‘rooms’ that would fit in the trailer.” “Oh, that doesn’t seem so hard.” You say, relieved. “One step at a time.” Says Robbie. “This is the first step.” “Gosh, I always just feel like I’m rushing through the day trying to do a hundred things at once and not doing anything very well.” You say. “I think everyone has those moments.” Says Robbie. “But when we slow down, do things one step at a time and really listen to ourselves, we always get to where we want to be.” “That’s good advice.” You say. “Keep it simple and take it one step at a time.” Robbie grins at you. The two of you sit in companionable silence, cutting things out of magazines and sticking them onto the bulletin board Robbie has placed on the floor in front of you. In your pile, you have: [[A contemporary bright floral patterned couch, 2 sea blue wing back chairs in a textured bumpy fabric, and three dark wooden end tables with bare Edison bulb lamps on them.|Floral couch]] [[A throw rug in a colourful geometric pattern, a white, sculptural couch, and several of poofs and foot stools in a variety of textures and shapes.|Throw rug]] [[A long, glass-topped coffee table on large, industrial looking castors, a textured blue couch with removable back rests on long metal pegs, and two arm chairs in brightly coloured geometric patterned fabric.|Coffee table]]

''“Hand me downs and curb side finds.”'' “That’s normal when you’re first starting out.” Says Robbie. “And sometimes you can find great things on the curb. Do you just use the things you find as is, or do you DIY a look out of them?” [[“I use them as is.”]] [[“I DIY a look out of them.”]]

''A contemporary bright floral patterned couch, 2 sea blue wing back chairs in a textured bumpy fabric, and three dark wooden end tables with bare Edison bulb lamps on them.'' “See.” Says Robbie. “You picked out things you like and you put them together in a cohesive look.” You smile and nod. “I do see.” You say. “The more we practice noticing what we like, picking out what we like and putting it together in interesting ways that work, the more style we develop and the more confidence we can have in our ability to make our own decisions.” Says Robbie. “That’s an important step towards good self-care and it’s something I want you to practice.” She hands you a cloth bag filled with magazines. “Homework.” She says. “Got it.” You smile at her. “And thanks for your help. I’m starting to feel better about doing this now." “Yay! I’m so glad!” Squeals Robbie, clapping her hands together. “So, what have you learned here today that can help you as our Self-Care Stylist?” She asks. [[“Make a plan and take it step by step.”]] [[“Slow down so you can know your own mind.”]] [[“Simple is always better.”]]

''A throw rug in a colourful geometric pattern, a white, sculptural couch, and several poofs and foot stools in a variety of textures and shapes.'' Robbie looks at your choices. “I do love a throw rug.” She says. “Especially in an open concept space like this one. A solid throw rug helps define the space and add some visual interest.” You allow yourself a small, proud smile. “And I can see you feel good about your choices.” Says Robbie. “I love the idea of a white couch and then other interesting pieces that add texture to the room. Plus, it creates a more versatile space when you have smaller pieces you can move around or use for more than one purpose.” You nod. Apparently, you know more about design than you thought. “Really, I just picked pieces I would want to have in my own living space.” You say. “I don’t know any of the theory of design or anything.” “Knowing what you like is more important, at least starting out, than theory. The more we practice picking out what we like and putting it together in interesting ways, the more style we develop and the more confidence we can have in our ability to make our own decisions.” Says Robbie. “That’s an important step towards good self-care and it’s something I want you to practice.” She hands you a cloth bag filled with magazines. “Homework.” She says. “Got it.” You smile at her. “That was fun, and helpful! I’m starting to feel better about doing this.” “I’m glad to hear that.” Says Robbie earnestly. “So, what have you learned here today that can help you as our Self-Care Stylist?” She asks. [[“Make a plan and take it step by step.”]] [[“Slow down so you can know your own mind.”]] [[“Simple is always better.”]]

''A long, glass-topped coffee table on large, industrial looking castors, a textured blue couch with removable back rests on long metal pegs, and two arm chairs in brightly coloured geometric patterned fabric.'' “See.” Says Robbie. “You picked out things you like and you put them together in a cohesive look.” You smile and nod. “I do see.” You say. “I love how versatile these pieces are too.” She says. “The coffee table has wheels so it can easily be moved around, and that couch can transform into a chaise because those back pieces can be rearranged to be armrests.” “I thought versatile might be good for a small space that needs to have several uses.” You say shyly. Robbie nods encouragingly. “See, you filled the brief perfectly.” She says. “The more we practice noticing what we like, picking out what we like and putting it together in interesting ways that work, the more style we develop and the more confidence we can have in our ability to make our own decisions. It’s useful for design and it’s also useful for self-care.” She hands you a cloth bag filled with magazines. “Homework.” She says. “I want you to practice picking out things you like and grouping them together in ways you find pleasing.” “Sort of like design meditation.” You say. “Exactly. And once you know how to do it for furniture, you’ll be able to do it for self-care products.” She says. “I’m starting to feel better about doing this now.” You say. “I really appreciate your help.” “I’m glad I could help. And I know you’re going to be great.” Says Robbie. “So, what have you learned here today that can help you as our Self-Care Stylist?” She asks. [[“Make a plan and take it step by step.”]] [[“Slow down so you can know your own mind.”]] [[“Simple is always better.”]]

''“I use them as is.”'' “I always mean to do something to them. Sand them down or paint them or reupholster them or whatever, but then, I never get around to it.” You say. Robbie nods. “And that can work when you’re just starting out.” She says. “But let me ask you, what do you do with your free time?” “Oh, uh, I go on social media and I watch a lot of TV and I go out with my friends.” You say. “Stuff like that.” “A lot of people, when they are getting used to being independent, aren’t very intentional with their free time.” Says Robbie. “They do a lot of things that suck up time but they don’t enjoy themselves very much. I want to encourage you to be intentional with your free time. Use it to do things that really fill you up and make you happy, instead of just entertained. Then you might have time to get to all those projects you mean to do but don’t find time for.” “Good advice.” You say. “So, today, we’re going to put your creative muscles to work.” Says Robbie handing you a stack of magazines and a pair of scissors. “You are going to help me brainstorm designs for this space.” “But!” You protest. “I don’t know anything about design.” Robbie laughs. “Don’t worry. I promise this is not scary. All I want you to do is look through the magazines and cut out the pieces that speak to you. For this space, we are going for a mix of eclectic, casual, and contemporary. But it also has to be comfortable. Ok?” “Ok.” You say a little bit uncertainly. “Just take it one step at a time.” Says Robbie. “Cutting out things you like is the first step. Arranging them into groupings that might work for the space is the second step. Neither one is life-threatening.” You smile. “Got it. Simple. I like that.” The two of you sit in companionable silence, cutting things out of magazines and sticking them onto the bulletin board Robbie has placed on the floor in front of you. In your pile, you have placed: [[A contemporary bright floral patterned couch, 2 sea blue wing back chairs in a textured bumpy fabric, and three dark wooden end tables with bare Edison bulb lamps on them.|Floral couch]] [[A throw rug in a colourful geometric pattern, a white, sculptural couch, and several of poofs and foot stools in a variety of textures and shapes.|Throw rug]] [[A long, glass-topped coffee table on large, industrial looking castors, a textured blue couch with removable back rests on long metal pegs, and two arm chairs in brightly coloured geometric patterned fabric.|Coffee table]]

''“I DIY a look out of them.”'' “That’s a great start to discovering your own aesthetic.” Says Robbie. “Tell me about that process.” You think for a minute. “Well, usually the things I pick up on the street are well-made but old and maybe falling apart a bit. Or they are scratched and scuffed. I avoid anything that’s mostly made of fabric, like a couch, unless I can reupholster it.” You say. “Then I sand and repair and refinish things.” “So do you paint them?” Asks Robbie. You nod. “I really like bright colours.” You say. “My walls are mostly neutral tones so I like to add a pop of colour with a piece of painted furniture.” “See, already you have an aesthetic.” Says Robbie. “We almost always know more than we think we do.” She adds with a wink. “I think I’m starting to see that.” You agree. “So, for this space, we are going for a mix of eclectic, casual, and contemporary. But it also has to be comfortable.” Says Robbie. “My first step is to look through magazines and online resources and just pull everything that I love and that strikes me as fitting with the look we are going for. Then I arrange them in groupings on this bulletin board. Want to help me with that?” “Sure.” You say, a bit uncertainly. Robbie hands you a stack of magazines and a pair of scissors. “It’s just like in elementary school. Cut out the things you like. And then we’ll try to arrange them into ‘rooms’ that would fit in the trailer.” “But, that’s so simple!” You say. “It’s one step at a time. Simple is always better.” Says Robbie. “Anyone who tells you different is selling something. You have to take your time with things that matter.” She adds. “People are more patient than we give them credit for. They can wait.” “Gosh, I always just feel like I’m rushing through the day. Everything is half-assed and hurried.” You say. “Lots of people are like that.” Says Robbie. “But when we rush through with the first idea or the first solution, we aren’t always happy in the end. When I take the time to make a plan and listen to myself, I always get to where I want to be.” “That’s good advice.” You say. Robbie grins at you. The two of you sit in companionable silence, cutting things out of magazines and sticking them onto the bulletin board Robbie has placed on the floor in front of you. In your pile, you have placed: [[A contemporary bright floral patterned couch, 2 sea blue wing back chairs in a textured bumpy fabric, and three dark wooden end tables with bare Edison bulb lamps on them.|Floral couch]] [[A throw rug in a colourful geometric pattern, a white, sculptural couch, and several of poofs and foot stools in a variety of textures and shapes.|Throw rug]] [[A long, glass-topped coffee table on large, industrial looking castors, a textured blue couch with removable back rests on long metal pegs, and two arm chairs in brightly coloured geometric patterned fabric.|Coffee table]]

(set: $step_by_step to true) ''“Make a plan and take it step by step.”'' “Such a simple thing, right?” Says Robbie. “I mean, it’s one of those things you think you already know, and then someone shows you how to actually do it and it’s like ‘ooooh, that’s what that means.” You say. “Right?” Says Robbie. “So, where are you off to next?” (if: $therapy_mag and $design_robbie and $organize_kerry and $food_toni and $fashion_grey is true)[ [[You step outside into the late afternoon light.]]](else:)[ [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]]

(set: $slow_down to true) ''“Slow down so you can know your own mind.”'' “It’s such a simple thing isn’t it?” Says Robbie. “It is.” You agree. “But simple is always better right?” Robbie laughs and nods. “Exactly.” She says. “I think you’re going to be a great Self-Care Stylist.” “Even if I can’t style a single thing.” You agree. Robbie winks at you. “So where are you off to next?” (if: $therapy_mag and $design_robbie and $organize_kerry and $food_toni and $fashion_grey is true)[ [[You step outside into the late afternoon light.]]](else:)[ [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]]

(set: $simple_better to true) ''“Simple is always better.”'' “I mean, it’s true about everything, not just design.” Says Robbie. “I’m starting to see that.” You say. “It’s not something I ever thought much about before.” “But now that you’re thinking and learning?” Asks Robbie. “I feel way better about things.” You say. “More confident that I can do a good job and not let anyone down.” “Including yourself.” Says Robbie. “Yes. Including myself.” You agree. “Plus, Grey was right. I do have more skills than I thought I had when I started out. So that makes me feel kind of better about things.” “Excellent.” Says Robbie. “So, where are you off to next?” (if: $therapy_mag and $design_robbie and $organize_kerry and $food_toni and $fashion_grey is true)[ [[You step outside into the late afternoon light.]]](else:)[ [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]]

''“I’m such an idiot.”'' “Oh, I don’t know.” Says Kerry, flopping down into the chair next to you. “There are a number of people who are getting to be pretty famous because they lied about who they are and it got found out.” You smile. “Yeah. I’ve seen that on Twitter.” You say. “I guess the internet and the whole social media thing does kind of give people a way to embrace inauthenticity and use it to their advantage.” “And you only pretended to be educated.” Says Kerry. “You didn’t pretend to be from Africa or Spain or somewhere.” You tilt your head at her in a “can you imagine?” kind of gesture. “Sadly, it’s a thing that happens.” She says. “So, the question is, do you want to join the scores of people who are leading pretend lives on social media? Or do you maybe want to do something real? Or as real as a reality show ever is.” “Well, obviously I want to say that I want to do something real.” You say. “But, I’m not sure I would shun internet infamy either.” “Oh?” Says Kerry. “That’s interesting. Tell me about that.” You shrug. “There’s something about internet drama.” You say. “People can’t get enough but it passes really quickly. The scandal explodes and then it’s over. But I wonder if the people who have been exposed during the drama, are then given a chance to reinvent themselves in a way they might not have had if not for the drama?” Kerry looks at you quizzically for a moment. “Could you use this moment the same way?” She asks. “Is there something about this situation that will allow you to reinvent yourself in some way?” “There is.” You say. “But, I’m not sure I want to be a stylist, in the end.” “But it’s what you’ve got to work with at the moment.” Says Kerry. “Yes. Do you think that’s bad? Do you think I should just walk away before I cause even more damage?” You ask. Kerry thinks for a moment and then shakes her head slowly. “No.” She says. “I think you should take this chance and get every good thing you can from it. Being a Self-Care Stylist on a small Canadian Reality TV show might be what is right for you at this moment. What do you think about that?” “I think it at least deserves consideration.” You agree. “So, did you learn anything you might use in your role as Self-Care Stylist?” She asks. [[“Keep moving forward.”]] [[“Let go of what you no longer need.”]] [[“Focus on what feels right in the moment.”]]

''“This is too good to be true.”'' “You are afraid it will be taken away from you?” Kerry asks. You nod. “It could be taken away.” She says bluntly. “But right now, you have this chance. You can worry about what might happen or you can embrace it. What thought would Ignite Happiness?” Asks Kerry. “You guys believe I can do this?” Kerry nods and smiles at you. “We do.” She says. “We all have things in our history that we thought were too good to be true too and it always turned out that they were just what we needed. This could be just what you need.” “Thanks.” You tell her. “This was helpful.” “Did you learn anything you might use in your role as Self-Care Stylist?” [[“Keep moving forward.”]] [[“Let go of what you no longer need.”]] [[“Focus on what feels right in the moment.”]]

''“I don’t deserve this.”'' “Oh pfft!” Says Kerry, gathering up the discard pile and carrying it to a large garbage can in the corner of the trailer. “Who’s to say who deserves anything?” “What do you mean?” You ask. “What I mean is: this is a kind of self-pitying inside the box thinking. And you need to let that thinking go. It’s not helping you. You have this chance, this crazy, I-can’t-believe-this-is-happening chance and you are just going to mope around not feeling worthy of that? I say, grab this chance and run with it. Let go of the self-pity. It’s not an attractive quality in a person.” She says. You are a bit taken aback at her bluntness. “All I’m saying is, don’t waste this chance by focusing on how you don’t deserve it.” Kerry says more gently. “To me, those are not thoughts that Ignite Happiness. We believe you can do this, so probably, you can do this.” You nod slowly and stand up. “Ok.” You say. “I can do that.” “What can you do?” Asks Kerry pointedly. [[“Keep moving forward.”]] [[“Let go of what you no longer need.”]] [[“Focus on what feels right in the moment.”]]

(set: $moving_forward to true) ''“Keep moving forward.”'' “Ok.” Says Kerry. “Then in the spirit of moving forward. Where are you off to next?” (if: $therapy_mag and $design_robbie and $organize_kerry and $food_toni and $fashion_grey is true)[ [[You step outside into the late afternoon light.]]](else:)[ [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]]

(set: $no_longer_need to true) ''“Let go of what you no longer need.”'' “Good.” Says Kerry. “Where are you off to next?” You stand up and stretch. You feel lighter and more confident than you have felt in a long time. Maybe this is going to work out after all. (if: $therapy_mag and $design_robbie and $organize_kerry and $food_toni and $fashion_grey is true)[ [[You step outside into the late afternoon light.]]](else:)[ [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]]

(set: $right_moment to true) ''“Focus on what feels right in the moment.”'' “And…” Prompts Kerry. “What do you feel is right in this moment?” “I’m going to stop second guessing this.” You say, a bit more forcefully than you intended. “And if it doesn’t turn out the way I’m expecting, I’ll deal with that when it happens.” “Life is fluid.” Says Kerry. “Go with it.” “Right.” “Where are you off to next?” (if: $therapy_mag and $design_robbie and $organize_kerry and $food_toni and $fashion_grey is true)[ [[You step outside into the late afternoon light.]]](else:)[ [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]]

''I’m an emotional eater'' “Ok.” Says Toni. “What exactly does that look like for you?” [[“I prefer comfort foods.”]] [[“A lot of junk food.”]] [[“Whatever looks good in the moment.”]]

''I’m a very healthy eater'' “Great!” Says Toni. “So, what exactly does that look like?” [[“I’m a smoothies and salads person.”]] [[“I’m a flexitarian and I try to eat organic.”]] [[“I’m a full-on plant-based health-food guru.”]]

''I never thought much about it before'' “I never thought much about it before.” You admit, a bit sheepishly. It’s only been a couple of hours, but already your life feels vastly different than it did when you got up this morning. “Ok, so use that.” Says Toni. “Let’s think about that now, and then, when you’re helping our ''Stars'' with their own Self-Care, you can reference your own experience and that will make it feel more personal, more real, for the person you’re helping. We don’t want our ''Stars'' to feel like we are somehow better or luckier or smarter than they are just because we’re the so-called ‘experts’ on a reality show. We want to show them that we are just like them and so they can take the same steps we took to make their lives better or easier or happier.” “That’s a good idea.” You say. “I can do that.” “So, tell me your food style right now.” Toni prompts gently. [[“I’m a full-on plant-based health-food guru.”]] [[“I mostly eat pre-prepared, convenience foods.”]] [[“I’m a grazer.”]]

''“I prefer comfort foods.”'' “Comfort food isn’t necessarily a bad thing.” Says Toni. “A lot of healthy options can be ‘comforting’ and familiar. The bigger question is, why are you choosing comfort foods over, say, salads and smoothies or another healthy option.” You look down at your feet, embarrassed. “I don’t know.” You say. “After a long, stressful, boring, pointless day at work, food that is familiar somehow makes the day less bad." “You really don’t like your job?” Says Toni. “Oh, it’s fine.” You say. “But it’s not what I thought I would be doing. It’s not what I want to be doing. It doesn’t really use any of my skills, so it just feels like a place holder. I feel almost frozen in time.” “I get that.” Toni says. “It can be hard to get started as an adult.” “When you’re in school they make you believe that there is such a great future ahead of you; that, of course you can do whatever you want to do with your life; there’s no way you can fail. And then you get out and apply for jobs and everyone wants you to already have 5 year’s experience and be established and have a good social media following and you think: ‘ok, how do I get that? Who’s going to give me that experience and help me get established?’ Somehow, that first step is missing.” “So, that’s why you lied to get this job.” Says Toni. “There aren’t a lot of good options for people like me.” You say quietly. “I still can’t believe I didn't get fired!” Toni nods. “Yeah, you have such a big chance here.” She says. “So make the most of it because most people won’t get a chance like this.” “I will!” You say. Toni smiles, pulls out a couple of cutting boards and sets them on the counter in front of you. “So, when you think of comfort foods, what comes to mind?” She asks. [[“Mac and Cheese.”]] [[“Thai curry.”]] [[“Potato Salad.”]]

''“A lot of junk food.”'' “Ok.” Says Toni. “What does that look like?” [[“I mostly eat pre-prepared, convenience foods.”]] [[“I carry a variety of protein bars around in my bag.”]] [[“I eat a lot of stuff in colourful packages from the snack section of the grocery store.”]]

''“Whatever looks good in the moment.”'' Toni nods. “So, when you’re out grabbing a coffee, you grab something to eat that looks good to you right then?” “Yeah, a sandwich or a muffin or a croissant or something.” You say with a shrug. “So tell me,” says Toni, “does that seem like a good self-care habit?” You smile wryly and shrug a single shoulder. “I guess not.” You hedge. Toni flashes her big, green eyes at you. “It’s not.” She snaps. “And we owe our ''Stars'' authenticity at the very least. We can’t ask them to do things we, ourselves, are not willing to do. Can you understand how it looks bad if you are not practicing good self-care yourself?” You nod. “So, you need to step up your game if you want to succeed as part of this team.” Says Toni sternly. “Lots of things in life are genuinely hard. But taking good care of yourself is not one of those things. That’s something everyone can and should do. And we’re going to be emphasizing that in our sessions with our ''Stars'', so it’s important that we take our own advice.” “That makes sense.” You say. “I guess my life has felt kind of untethered for a while now so eating in a way that is also good self-care hasn’t even been on my radar. I just stopped paying attention to things like health and self-care and spent my time stressing instead.” Toni’s shoulders relax and she smiles at you. “Listen, I get it.” She says. “We all have times like that.” “I’m happy to take whatever advice you have to offer.” You say hopefully. “Good.” Says Toni. “Then today, I’m going to teach you how to make a couple of easy, delicious, healthy meals that you can make at home, and that make great leftovers for lunches.” She pulls open the fridge and hands you a stack of containers. “The important thing is to not change too many things too fast.” She says, pulling out a large pot and setting it on the stove. “If you change one small thing at a time and let that change become a habit before changing something else, there’s a much better chance that the changes will last.” She says. “I can do that.” You say. “So, since you like sandwiches and wraps and things, we’re going to make something that you can either eat as a wrap or as a meal with rice or noodles or something.” Says Toni. “How does that sound?” “That sounds awesome! Then I could take leftovers for lunch.” You say. “It’s like a two in one deal.” Toni laughs. “Right.” She says. “So what would you like to make today?” [[Smokey vegetarian chili]] [[Samosa potato salad]] [[Lentil larb]]

''“Mac and cheese.”'' “Ooh!” Says Toni with a little hop of thrill. “Mac and Cheese is one of my favourite comfort foods!” “Yeah.” You agree. “But it’s so much work to make it. Not the boxed stuff, but real mac and cheese.” Toni smiles and pulls open the fridge. Wordlessly, she hands you a stack of containers. “So, today, we’re going to make a really delicious, easy mac and cheese.” She says. She pulls out a large pot and fills it with water. “Pasta does better with very salty water, so why don’t you add salt to that until it takes almost like the sea?” She says, handing you a small bowl of flaked salt. “Ok.” You say uncertainly. Toni puts a firm and reassuring hand on your shoulder and waits for you to look at her. “I promise, this mac and cheese is just as fast and easy as the boxed stuff, but it tastes so much better!” "Ok!" You grin. "I believe you." You fill the pot with water, pour in a small handful of salt and stir. “Ok, so while the water boils we are going to make the sauce.” Says Toni. “And I actually prefer a vegan sauce because it’s fast, easy and super creamy.” Toni pulls out a blender and opens a box of cashews. “Our main ingredient is unsalted cashews.” She says throwing a handful into the blender. “Often, you have to soak cashews to get them soft enough to blend up creamy. But, I have found that with a high powered blender, you can just add hot water and blend and it will grind up just fine.” She adds some hot water from the tap and turns on the blender. “Ok, and then we just throw in some smoked paprika, mustard, garlic, olive oil, soy sauce, lemon juice and nutritional yeast.” She says, tossing in each ingredient as she names it. The mixture in the blender transforms into a beautiful orangey-red paste. Toni turns off the blender. “And that’s your base sauce.” She says. “Wow.” You say. “That’s so easy.” “Cooking doesn’t have to be a big commitment.” Says Toni. “It doesn’t have to be time consuming or difficult either. Just take it step-by-step and try to enjoy the process. So, our water is ready for the pasta and we are going to use these miniature shells because they hold the sauce better than macaroni.” She throws some pasta into the water and gives it a quick stir. “You want it to be al dente.” She says, setting a timer. “Not soft because it will absorb the liquid from the sauce.” She hands you a small, metal bowl and a container of Panko bread crumbs. “Now, we’re going to make the topping.” She says. “I don’t love a bread topping, but this one is really savoury and delicious.” She tosses a bit of oil, some paprika and a clove of garlic into the bowl and then shakes out some of the bread crumbs. “Here.” She says. “Just stir that around while I drain these noodles.” She drains the pasta and pours it into a large, white casserole dish. “And now we just pour the sauce on top, mix it together and then, if you want, we can add a nice mix of shredded cheese on top of that before we sprinkle the bread topping on top.” She says. She hands you a container of mixed, shredded cheese. You dutifully sprinkle a generous amount on top of the pasta. Toni shakes on the bread topping and shoves the whole thing into the oven. “And that just bakes for 20 minutes or so.” She says. “So. How was that?” “Easy.” You say. “Very straightforward, simple and fun, actually. Not hard or boring at all.” “Right.” Toni agrees. “So, have you learned anything here that you might be able to use as our Self-Care Stylist?” [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

''“Potato Salad.”'' “This is one of my favourite recipes.” Says Toni handing you a vegetable peeler. “How are you at peeling potatoes?” You laugh and get to work on the small pile of potatoes Toni piles on the counter. “This is a stepped-up version of a potato salad and it’s kind of like a samosa filling. It’s got curry inspiration and it is so super easy to make.” Says Toni. “Curry is a really comforting flavour but I think people get afraid of it because they think it is going to be too spicy. This salad is not spicy, it’s just really flavourful. We are just going to boil these potatoes until they are tender.” You chop the potatoes into wedges using a trick your father taught you. Toni raises her eyebrows, impressed. “Where did you learn to cut potatoes like that?” She asks. “My father came from a restaurant family.” You explain. “He taught us all how to cook when we were kids.” “But, you don’t cook for yourself now?” Asks Toni. “I think I just get overwhelmed and anxious about life and then it seems easier to just grab something quick and get it over with.” You say. “But I really love to eat good food. I would be happy to cook some easy things. I just haven’t had any really good recipes that could work for a person living on her own before.” Toni nods. “I think lots of people starting out have that problem.” She says. “And also single parents, working parents, dog owners…” You laugh. “Ok, I get it. You have to put in the effort.” You say. “And then, after a while, it will stop feeling like an effort and start feeling like an old friend. Plus, cooking from scratch is better for you.” Says Toni. “A lot of prepared and packaged foods have tons of sodium and no fibre at all. When you make a meal from scratch, you can control those things and that’s part of good self-care: taking good care of your body.” You nod and toss the potatoes into the pot. “That’s a good point.” You say. “So the dressing for this salad is curry based and is basically just oil, curry powder and lime juice.” Says Toni. “We are going to fry the curry powder in the oil first.” She pulls out a small frying pan and adds a generous amount of oil. “And once the potatoes are done, we are just going to throw a handful of frozen peas in the water for a second.” She says, thrusting a bag of frozen peas into your hands. You throw the peas into the pot, wait a minute and then drain the potatoes and peas. “This salad also has some chickpeas for protein and a bit of mint and some shaved coconut. And because the dressing is so flavourful, you can get away with not adding salt.” Says Toni. You throw all the ingredients into a bowl and Toni pours the hot dressing on top. The kitchen fills with an earthy, tangy, smokey smell and your mouth waters. “Ready to taste?” Asks Toni. “Oh yeah!” You say. The salad is zesty, fragrant and very flavourful. “You could eat this on rice as a meal.” Says Toni. “Or you could stuff it into a pita with some greens and maybe some tomato chutney and call that lunch.” You nod, your mouth full. “It’s terrific!” You say. “I will definitely be making this at home!” “Great!” Says Toni. “So, have you learned anything here that you might be able to use as our Self-Care Stylist?” [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

(set: $good_enough to true) ''“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”'' “Great!” Says Toni. “That’s a good rule for anyone. Plus, it’s something really simple that you can use when we are helping our ''Stars''.” You pull your phone out and write this down in the Notes section. “Now then.” Says Toni. “What do you say we make a delicious, salty snack?” “Ooh, I never say no to a snack.” You say. “What are we making?” “I was thinking some Thai chili fried peanuts.” “Yum!” “And while we’re doing that, you should decide which session you want to go to next.” (if: $therapy_mag and $design_robbie and $organize_kerry and $food_toni and $fashion_grey is true)[ [[You step outside into the late afternoon light.]]](else:)[ [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]]]

(set: $everyday_things to true) ''“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”'' “Great!” Says Toni. “And that is One Step to Good Self-Care. You can apply that rule to all kinds of things when we are helping our ''Stars''.” You pull your phone out and write this down in the Notes section. “Now then.” Says Toni. “I think after all that, it’s time to make some good old fashioned dessert. What do you think?” “Are you kidding?! I love dessert.” You say. “Ok. Get the ice cream out!” Says Toni. “I’ll get started on the bourbon caramel sauce. Oh, and you should think about where you want to go to next.” (if: $therapy_mag and $design_robbie and $organize_kerry and $food_toni and $fashion_grey is true)[ [[You step outside into the late afternoon light.]]](else:)[ [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]]]

(set: $too_much to true) ''“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”'' “Great!” Says Toni. “And that is One Step to Good Self-Care. You can apply that rule to all kinds of things when we are helping our ''Stars''.” You pull your phone out and write this down in the Notes section. “Now then.” Says Toni. “We're going to make a mostly healthy, very tasty, portable snack!” "I love a snack!" You say. "What are we going to make?" "Nut butter balls!" Says Toni, piling ingredients onto the counter. "These are my favourite little power bites. A little bit sweet, a little bit salty and very satisfying." You nod dubiously. "Ok." You say. "That does sound tasty." Toni grins at you and scooping some sunflower butter, honey and molasses into a bowl. "So much tastier than a protein bar, and it only takes 5 minutes to make." She says, adding some ground oats, miniature chocolate chips and toffee bits. You nod approvingly. “So, while we roll this mixture into bite sized balls" Says Toni, handing you something that looks like a miniature ice cream scoop. "You’re going to decide which session you want to go to next.” (if: $therapy_mag and $design_robbie and $organize_kerry and $food_toni and $fashion_grey is true)[ [[You step outside into the late afternoon light.]]](else:)[ [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]]]

''“I mostly eat pre-prepared, convenience foods.”'' “So, you’re single and you live alone.” Says Toni. You nod. “Any pets.” “Sadly, no.” You say. “What kind of convenience foods are you using?” Asks Toni. “Well, I buy some microwaveable box dinners at the grocery store and I eat a lot of smoothies made with frozen fruit and I’m a pro with the peanut butter toast. And I order out a lot.” You admit. “So, those box dinners have a really high sodium content which isn’t very good for you.” Says Toni. “What I would suggest, if you find it too hard to cook from scratch, is to sign up for one of those meal prep services, where the ingredients come to you pre-prepared and you just follow the instructions to cook the meal. Like Good Food or Chef’s Plate. Those are at least healthier than a boxed lasagna or something.” “Those meal prep programs have always felt like such a huge commitment.” You say. “Are you afraid of commitment?” Asks Toni. You’ve never really thought about it before. “Well, I guess not.” You say, finally. Toni looks at you sternly. “The things that matter are worth a commitment.” She says. “Does your health matter? Does feeling good matter?” “They do.” You say. “I know they do. I’ve just never felt very grounded in what I was doing before, so maybe that makes it feel scarier to make a commitment to something.” “What we want to show our Stars is how to have confidence in their choices.” Says Toni. “It’s a good lesson for anyone to learn. Make a decision and feel confident with it.” “Ok.” You say, tentatively. Toni is much stricter than you thought she would be. “We’re going to practice right now.” Says Toni. She pulls three pamplets out of a top drawer and lays them out on the counter in front of you. “Here are three pamphlets for really interesting meal prep companies.” She says. “They are kind of a step above the normal kind. They cater to people who are a bit daring in their food tastes. You are going to pick 3 meals from one of the plans. That’s like, 3 dinners. That will tell you a bit about your food style and also give you some confidence in making decisions.” You look at the three pamplets uncertainly for a moment and then pick: [[Tastes from Around the World: Vegan Shepherd’s Pie with Rock Your Socks off Vegan Gravy, Whole Roasted Cauliflower with Butter Curry Sauce, Three Bean Chili with Chocolate.|Tastes from around the world]] [[Dinner salad in a jar: Smokey Chickpea and spinach salad with spicy paprika vinaigrette, Samosa inspired potato-salad with arugula and spicy lime curry vinaigrette, Sesame noodles with spiralized carrot and cucumber and ginger tahini dressing.|Dinner salad]] [[Gourmet Made Easy: Grilled Chicken with Lemon-butter sauce and sauteed broccoli on a bed of fresh linguine pasta, Smokey Mac N Cheese bake with roasted garlic topping, Ratatouille with fresh andouille sausage and grilled chicken breasts.|Gourmet made easy]]

''“I carry a variety of protein bars around in my bag.”'' Toni laughs. “You sustain yourself on protein bars?” You shrug. “My day is busy and if I want something else I can just go to a coffee shop or a burrito shop and grab something.” You say with a shrug. Toni nods. “So, do you do any cooking at all?” “Not much.” You admit. “I mostly eat stuff that I can just grab out of the fridge or microwave and go.” “Is that because you can’t cook?” Asks Toni. “No, I can cook.” You say. “My parents were great cooks and they always involved me and my brothers in the meal making.” “Do you like to cook?” Asks Toni. You shrug. “I never thought about it before.” You say. “Cooking is just one of those utilitarian things you have to do sometimes. I don’t think I’ve done enough cooking, on my own, to know if I like it.” “Well, part of good self-care is taking care of your body.” Says Toni. “And the three pillars of taking care of your body are: rest, exercise, and nutrition.” “Right.” You say. “Don’t worry.” Says Toni, putting her hand firmly on your shoulder. “It doesn’t have to be stressful or hard or even fast. It’s better if we change things slowly, actually, because then we have a chance to form a habit and that makes it more likely that we’ll stick with any changes we make.” “Ok.” You say. “But, what if I’m happy with how things are? What if I don’t feel like I need to change anything?” Toni raises her eyebrows at you. “Really Vanessa?” She says, incredulity creeping into her voice. “You think it’s ok to just snack on protein bars all day and then get take out for dinner and still advise people on how to have better self-care?” “No.” You say. “I’m just afraid you’re going to make me learn how to cook.” Toni laughs. “Ok.” She says. “If you don’t love to cook, we can work with that. There are all kinds of better options out there for people who don’t feel confident in their cooking game.” “Oh?” You say. “Sure.” Says Toni. “There are meal subscription boxes and meal prep boxes. There are frozen meal services. I mean, there is literally something for everyone and it does not have to be daunting. You don’t even have to go to the grocery store. What’s your favourite food?” She asks. “What do you wish you could easily make at home?” [[“Japanese ramen.”]] [[“Thai curry.”]] [[“Mac and Cheese.”]]

''“I eat a lot of stuff in colourful packages from the snack section of the grocery store.”'' “Oh dear.” Says Toni. “We have our work cut out for us!” You grin ruefully. “I know it’s not good for my health. But after a long, stressful, boring, pointless day at work, food that is familiar somehow makes the day feel less bad.” You say. “You really don’t like your job?” Says Toni. “Oh, it’s fine.” You say. “But it’s not what I thought I would be doing. It’s not what I want to be doing. It doesn’t really use any of my skills, so it just feels like a place holder; like a step to nowhere.” “I get that.” Toni says. “It can be hard to get started as an adult.” “When you’re in school they make you believe that there is such a great future ahead of you; that, of course you can do whatever you want to do with your life; there’s no way you can fail. And then you get out and apply for jobs and everyone wants you to already have 5 year’s experience and be established and have a good social media following and you think: ‘Ok, how do I get that? Who’s going to give me that experience and help me get established?’ Somehow, that first step is missing.” “So, that’s why you lied to get this job.” Says Toni. “I still can’t believe I didn't get fired!” You say quietly. “It was an astronomically stupid thing to do.” Toni nods. “It was…astonishing.” She says. “But look, you have such a big chance here.” She says. “So make the most of it because most people won’t get a chance like this.” “I will!” You say. Toni smiles and places a firm but friendly hand on your shoulder. “So tell me what a typical day looks like for you food-wise.” “It’s not good.” You warn her. “I can take it.” She says. “Ok, if you’re sure.” You say. “I usually start the day with some kind of breakfast bar. There’s one kind that has jam in it and another kind that’s like oatmeal with maple syrup. Or sometimes I eat a package of mini muffins.” Tony staggers backwards and clutches her heart in mock horror. “I told you it wasn’t good.” You say. “Go on, continue.” Says Toni. “Then, for lunch I usually get a veggie burger or a burrito or a chicken sandwich at like a fast food type place.” You say, wincing in preparation for the judgement that is sure to follow. “My god.” Hisses Toni, under her breath. “I know, I know.” You tell her. “Then for dinner, I usually get take out somewhere. Or I might make a grilled cheese sandwich. Or nachos. I really like nachos.” Toni mops her forehead with her dish towel. “I knew it was going to be bad.” She says. You nod. “How does eating all that make you feel?” She asks. “Not good.” You say. “Bloated and fat and tired and lazy.” “Well, the sodium content alone…” Says Toni and then stops. “Ok. So, you admit you have a problem and are powerless to change it on your own.” “Yeesss.” You say, hesitantly. “Will you give yourself over to a higher power?” She asks, raising one eyebrow. “Yeeees.” You say again. “The higher power of real food?” She presses on. You laugh. “Yes.” You say. “I will. I know that how I live now is not good for me and that I have to do better. This is a good push for me.” “Phew!” Says Toni. “So, I’m just going to show you a few easy, one pot recipes that make good leftovers and don’t take a lot of time and effort.” “Ok.” You say. “I’m ready.” “Good.” Says Toni. “Here are your choices.” [[“Japanese ramen.”]] [["Smokey vegetarian chili|Smokey vegetarian chili]] [[“Sesame noodle salad.”]]

''“Sesame noodle salad.”'' “Solid choice.” Says Toni. “This is super easy because you basically make this Thai inspired sesame peanut dressing and throw it over noodles and then add some veggies.” “I could probably manage that.” You say. Toni opens the fridge and pulls out a stack of containers. She hands them to you and then starts pulling various jars and bottles out of the cupboard. “To make the dressing, we basically just throw all the ingredients into a food processor and push go.” She says. “Its that simple.” She pulls out a large pot, fills it with water and puts it on the stove. “Pasta prefers salty water, so just go ahead and add some salt to that pot until the water tastes like the sea.” She says, handing you a small bowl of flaked salt. Fancy, you think, adding a few sprinkles to the water. “Then, while the water boils and the noodles cook, we just throw some sesame paste, peanut butter, soy sauce, honey, sesame oil and ginger into the food processor to make our sauce.” Tony masterfully tosses the ingredients into the food processor as she lists them off to you. “And then, we can spiralize some veggies.” She says handing you a gadget that is shaped like an hour glass. “I usually do some cucumbers and carrots.” She says. “But you could also do sweet potato or squash or zucchini, whatever you like.” She hands you half an English cucumber and you push it into the top of the hour glass and twist. Long, spiraling strips of cucumber come out the other end. “They look like noodles.” You say. “They do.” Says Toni. “You could also just cut these into chunks or strips but spiralized veggies are very attractive looking and that can be important when you are transitioning to real food.” She gives you a meaningful look and handily chops a container of grape tomatoes. “And now we’re ready.” She says, draining the noodles. “Wow, that was so fast and easy!” You say. Toni nods. “I’ll tell you a secret.” She says. “Most good food is.” She pours the sauce over the noodles and mixes them with a pair of tongs. Then she puts a small pile of noodles on a bed of mixed greens and tops them off with the spiralized veggies and tomatoes. “I always sprinkle some toasted sesame seeds as a garnish.” She says, tossing a handful of sesame seeds on top of each plate. “And there you have dinner.” You take a bite of the noodles and sigh contentedly. The mixture is nutty and sweet with just a hint of spice from the ginger. The veggies on top give it a nice crunch. “That’s so good!” You say. Toni nods. “So I always think it’s a good idea to start slow when you’re trying to make a major life change. If you try to change everything at once, there’s more risk that you might get frustrated and give up. Small changes are best.” You nod. “Actually, I’m so excited to learn all this stuff.” You say with your mouth full. “So, how are you feeling about all this now?” Toni asks. “Well, at first I felt really stupid.” You say. “I was sure Steve was going to fire me right away.” “It was a risk.” Agrees Toni. “I was amazed that Magenta was able to convince you all to go along with her idea, actually.” You say. “I’m still not quite sure I believe it.” “It’s so easy to feel like a fraud in this kind of situation.” Says Toni. “I mean, who am I really?” “What do you mean?” “I mean, I have a small restaurant that specializes in plant-based convenience foods and I’ve had a few kitchen jobs, but I didn’t go to school to be a chef or anything. I learned to cook because my mother was a chef.” She says. “But, you have a cookbook out!” You say. “Sure, that gives me some legitimacy I guess, but anyone can write a cookbook.” Says Toni. “All I’m saying is, just because you didn’t go to school for a thing doesn’t mean you can’t become pretty good at it.” “Ok, but I don’t know anything about self-care.” You protest. “Sure you do.” Says Toni. “What’s your food inspired self-care take-away here?” [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

''Smokey vegetarian chili'' “That’s a great choice.” Says Toni. “Because you can make a big pot and freeze some, or eat it as leftovers the next day, or eat it as kind of a sloppy joe on a bun too with some lettuce and avocado and tomato. It’s a very versatile choice and if you’re going to start with one thing, it’s good for it to be versatile.” She hands you a large knife and a red pepper. “Here, chop this up for me.” She says. “This recipe is super easy and comes together very quickly. You just chop up some pepper and onions and garlic to start. And then you can add any other veggies you like. I usually add some mushrooms for a meaty texture and maybe some zucchini if I have it.” “Why are we making a vegetarian version?” You ask, messily chopping your pepper. “Because we all need to up our vegetable game for good health and this is an easy way to include a whole bunch of vegetables. But also, it’s cheap to make and it keeps really well in the fridge and freezer.” Says Toni. “I think as a general rule, it’s better to pick a vegetarian or vegan option if you have the choice. Vegetables and fruits are really the keys to good health.” You nod and add your peppers to the other veggies in the pot. “Ok.” Says Toni. “Then, the rest is really simple. You add some canned chickpeas, black beans and lentils, or any other bean you like. Just make sure that if you are using beans from a can you rinse them really well.” She hands you a colander and dumps in an assortment of beans. You rinse them and add them to the pot. “And then, we just add tomato sauce.” Says Toni. “I usually try to find a low sodium kind. And some spices.” She pours in some tomato sauce and adds chili powder, oregano, cumin and cinnamon. “And then you let it simmer for about 40 minutes and it’s done.” She says. “It could not be easier. If you want, you can add some vegetarian ground round or even some chicken for more protein and texture.” “Wow, that is super easy.” You say. “And it makes a lot!” “So, have you learned anything here that you might be able to use as our Self-Care Stylist?” Asks Toni. [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

''Samosa potato salad'' “This is one of my favourite recipes.” Says Toni handing you a vegetable peeler. “How are you at peeling potatoes?” You laugh and get to work on the small pile of potatoes Toni piles on the counter. “So, this salad is so super easy.” Says Toni. “And really versatile. We are just going to boil these potatoes until they are tender.” You chop the potatoes into wedges using a trick your father taught you. Toni raises her eyebrows, impressed. “Where did you learn to cut potatoes like that?” She asks. “My father came from a restaurant family.” You explain. “He taught us all how to cook when we were kids.” “But, you don’t cook for yourself now?” Asks Toni. “I think I just get overwhelmed and anxious about life and then it seems easier to just grab something quick and get it over with.” You say. “But I really love to eat good food. I would be happy to cook some easy things. I just haven’t had any really good recipes that could work for a person living on her own before.” Toni nods. “I think lots of people starting out have that problem.” She says. “And also single parents, working parents, dog owners…” You laugh. “Ok, I get it. You have to put in the effort.” You say. “And then, after a while, it will stop feeling like an effort and start feeling like an old friend.” Says Toni. “So the dressing for this salad is curry-based and is basically just oil, curry powder and lime juice. We are going to fry the curry powder in the oil first.” She pulls out a small frying pan and adds a generous amount of oil. “And once the potatoes are done, we are just going to throw a handful of frozen peas in the water for a second.” She says, thrusting a bag of frozen peas into your hands. You throw the peas into the pot, wait a minute and then drain the potatoes and peas. “This salad also has some chickpeas for protein and a bit of mint and some shaved coconut.” Says Toni. You throw all the ingredients into a bowl and Toni pours the hot dressing on top. The kitchen fills with an earthy, tangy, smokey smell and your mouth waters. “Ready to taste?” Asks Toni. “Oh yeah!” You say. The salad is slightly spicy, tangy, warm and flavourful. “You could eat this on rice as a meal.” Says Toni. “Or you could stuff it into a pita with some greens and maybe some tomato chutney and call that lunch.” You nod, your mouth full. “It’s terrific!” You say. “I will definitely be making this at home!” “Great!” Says Toni. “So, have you learned anything here that you might be able to use as our Self-Care Stylist?” [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

''Lentil larb'' “I’m not actually sure what that is.” You add. “But it sounds interesting.” Toni laughs. “It’s actually a very fragrant mix of meat and spices from Laos.” She says. “But we’re going to make a vegetarian version with lentils.” “How come?” You ask. Toni pulls out a large pan and places it on the stove. “This vegetarian version is a bit healthier and a bit more versatile than the meat one.” She says. “It’s got lots of fibre from the lentils and we could all use more fibre. Fibre is one of the keys to good health.” You nod. “Well, I like lentils so I’m excited.” You say. “Good.” Says Toni pulling out a food processor. “We are going to start by making a kind of oniony, lemony paste to flavour the lentils.” She hands you two shallots and a sharp knife. “Just peel these and chop them roughly.” She says. You do as she says while she beats a long stalk of lemongrass with a knife, slices it up and tosses it in the food processor along with some garlic, ginger and lime zest. You throw your chopped onions into the mix. “So, if you like a little spice, we will just use a small amount of fresh chili pepper.” Says Toni. You nod. “Sure.” You say. “I don’t mind a bit of spice.” Toni throws in a small handful of chopped peppers, adds some oil and soy sauce and blends the whole mixture into a paste. “So, to make this extra easy, we are going to use canned lentils.” Says Toni. “But you can totally cook the lentils from scratch if you have the time.” She rinses some lentils under a lot of water. “And then, we are going to fry the sauce a bit.” She says, pouring the contents of the food processor into the pan on the stove. “And when that is nice and fragrant, we are going to throw in the lentils so they can absorb all those delicious flavours.” A tangy, spicy smell fills the kitchen and makes your mouth water. “So, you can eat it just like this, on rice or wrapped in lettuce leaves.” Says Toni. “But I like to make a little dressing to drizzle on and add even more flavour.” She hands you a handful of limes and a glass citrus juicer. “I need about a third of a cup of fresh lime juice for the dressing.” She says, pouring some soy sauce and a large spoonful of brown sugar into a small bowl. You quickly juice your limes and pour the juice into the bowl. Toni whisks the mixture together briskly. “That’s it.” She says. “Wow, that’s the fastest I’ve ever seen a dressing come together.” You say, impressed. Toni laughs. “I’ll tell you a secret.” She says. “All homemade dressings are that easy.” She hands you a small lettuce leaf and puts a spoonful of the lentil mixture on it. “Ready to taste?” She asks. You nod excitedly. Toni drizzles a small spoonful of dressing on top of the mixture in the lettuce leaf and you fold the leaf over to stop the filling from escaping and stuff the whole thing into your mouth. The bite is very flavourful: juicy and perfectly balanced between sweet, sour and earthy with a little bit of freshness from the lettuce leaf. You grin and nod. Toni smiles and makes a bite for herself. “So, have you learned anything here that you might be able to use as our Self-Care Stylist?” Toni asks, drizzling the dressing onto her lettuce bite and popping it into her mouth. [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

''“I’m a smoothies and salads person.”'' “Ooh, ok.” Says Toni. “I love a good green smoothie. So do you do the smoothies and salads thing because it’s quick and easy or some other reason?” “I live alone.” You say. “Smoothies and salads make more sense than cooking a big meal just for one person.” “Do you ever have friends over for a meal though?” Asks Toni. “Honestly, if a bunch of us are going to have a meal together, we usually go out.” You say. “Ok.” Says Toni. “We can work with that. I mean, you can get pretty creative with smoothies and salads. Especially salads. What does your usual mealtime salad look like?” [[“It’s your pretty standard lettuce, grilled chicken, Caesar inspired sort of deal.”]] [[“I usually try to get as many different greens in there as possible.”]] [[“I like anything with a maple-balsamic vinaigrette.”]]

''“I’m a flexitarian and I try to eat organic.”'' “Ok.” Says Toni. “That leaves us with a lot of options. So, describe your take on flexitarian.” “I try to eat mostly plants and vegetables, mostly because I have anxiety about cancer, but I don’t say no to a bit of meat or dairy sometimes.” You explain. “When I go out to eat with my friends, I might have some fish or chicken or something. When I’m at home, I mostly eat plants because it’s easy and fast.” “That sounds good.” Says Toni. “Do you go out to eat often?” You shake your head. “Maybe once a week.” You say. “If we’re going to go to a club or a movie or something afterwards.” “So mostly you eat at home on your own.” Says Toni. “Yes.” You say. “And I like to keep it quick and simple just because I hate cleaning up dishes, and to be honest, most nights I eat in front of the tv so it doesn’t make sense to do a lot of cooking.” “On those nights, what do you usually like to eat?” Asks Toni. “I eat a lot of pasta.” You admit. “What do you like on your pasta?” Asks Toni. “Everything.” You say. “Olive oil and sauteed mushrooms and snap peas with a bit of thyme is my go to. I eat that a lot of nights in a row.” Toni nods and hands you a pot. “It can be hard to cook healthy meals for one.” She says. “But pasta is a really good choice because there are so many kinds and you can change up the meal pretty easily by just changing the toppings.” “That’s a good idea.” You say, filling the pot with water and putting it on the stove. “So, today, we’re going to make a fresh pasta with lemon butter and pan steamed broccoli.” Toni says, handing you a cutting board and a knife. “The easiest way to make fresh pasta is in a pasta machine, so that’s what we’re going to use.” You watch as Toni adds the semolina flour, salt and water to the pasta machine on the counter. “So, how are you feeling about being a subject on this show and having us work our magic on you?” She asks, crushing some garlic with the blade of her knife. “I don’t know.” You say. “Mostly I’m embarrassed, but also, I don’t know how I’m going to do what you guys do.” “The same way we do it.” Says Toni. “Research, planning, and asking for help when you need it.” “It can’t be that simple.” You say, chopping up the broccoli as the pasta machine mechanically extrudes a perfect bed of skinny noodles onto the countertop. “It’s exactly that simple.” Says Toni. “No one can do everything. You just have to take it one step at a time, like cooking.” “Ok.” You say. “But I can’t do anything!” “If that were true, no one would have agreed to Magenta’s plan.” Says Toni. “You know how to do a lot of things. And the things you don’t know how to do, you can learn as you go, you can ask for help, you can get someone to show you and all that can be part of the show. Showing the audience a real person, with flaws, is a good thing. We’re all so focused on celebrities and social media dramas that explode in a fiery inferno and die down just as quickly. There’s something to be said for actual reality, even if reality shows aren’t usually that real.” “So, showing me learning all this stuff and figuring out how I’m going to become a Self-Care Stylist gives other people the idea that they can overcome their shortcomings too?” You ask. “Something like that.” Says Toni. “At any rate it makes our reality show a bit more real, and that’s a good thing. People crave real.” “Ok.” You say. “That’s helpful. I hadn’t thought about it like that. But I’m having to think about a lot of things I never thought about before.” “So, what’s your self-care take-away here?” Asks Toni. [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

''“I’m a full-on plant-based health-food guru.”'' “Ok!” Says Toni. “That’s what I like to hear! So tell me the sort of things you like to eat.” You think for a moment. “Well, I usually start the morning with a smoothie or a grain bowl.” You say. “For lunch I usually eat leftovers and then I cook something for dinner. Mostly I like warm food, but sometimes salad is ok too.” “That sounds pretty good.” Says Toni. “What sorts of things do you like to cook for dinner?” “I really like international foods, so that’s what I mostly make. Curry is my favourite.” You say. “I usually make a couple pots of different things on the weekend and then eat those throughout the week.” “That sounds like my style too.” Says Toni. “I love a meal that can be cooked in one pot.” “I live alone, so making something that creates a lot of dirty dishes seems pointless.” You agree. “So how did you build up your repertory of recipes that you like to make?” Asks Toni, pulling out a pot and putting it on the stove. “Well, I used to order out a lot.” You say. “But then my mum got cancer and it was a wake up call for me that you have to be healthy from a really young age to beat the odds.” Toni nods and starts peeling a piece of ginger. “That’s true.” She says. “You’re never too young to take your health seriously.” “So, then I learned to cook basically, one thing at a time, until I had a bank of recipes that I could make that didn’t take too long and that were healthy and delicious. I haven’t thought too much about it since. It’s just a habit now.” You explain. “And that’s what we want everything to be that we are going to teach our ''Stars''.” Says Toni. “You want Self-Care to be a habit. I want healthy eating to be a habit. So we have to show them how to achieve that.” “I see.” You say, the light dawning. Maybe you can do this after all. “So, just set a routine and then practice it until it’s a habit.” You say. “Right.” Says Toni. “You automatically choose healthy foods because it’s a habit. But before it became a habit you had to work at it. You had to come at it with intention. And there must have been some kind of tangible reward or payback that made you want to continue.” “Yeah, the food was delicious!” You say. Toni grins and throws the ginger, some garlic and a chopped onion into the pot with a bit of olive oil. The room fills with a fragrant, spicy smell. “That’s one of the things that makes it possible for people to change how they eat.” Says Toni. “Taste is a big motivator. But what about Self-Care? Can you translate anything we’ve talked about here to Self-Care?” [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

''“It’s your pretty standard lettuce, grilled chicken, Caesar inspired sort of deal.”'' “Would you say that’s your go-to salad?” Asks Toni. You shrug. “I guess.” You say. “I mean, it’s not very exciting. I think I mostly make it because it’s quick and easy and more or less healthy.” “I get it.” Says Toni. “Sometimes, when we live alone, we aren’t really motivated to cook an actual meal.” “It’s a lot of work for one person.” You agree. “This salad uses a bowl and a pan and that’s it. It doesn’t feel worth it to spend a lot of time chopping and cooking and then cleaning up when I’m just going to eat whatever it is in front of the tv in my pyjamas.” Toni laughs. “I know.” She says. “I’ve had times in my life too where I would just buy a tub of guacamole at the store, add a few veggies to it and eat it with chips and call that dinner.” “Been there.” You say. “But here’s the thing about salad that I love.” Says Toni. “You can invent pretty much anything in the salad universe and have it take only 20 minutes to prepare with minimal cleanup. Eating the same thing everyday is depressing. Changing it up is good for our mood and our health.” “Yeah.” You say. “It’s just that sometimes, after a long day at work, it’s hard to find the motivation to change it up.” Toni nods. “Here’s my solution." She says. "Right now you have one salad that you make pretty often right?” You nod. “So, do you have the ingredients ready to go in the fridge?” “Yes.” You say. “I usually grill a bunch of chicken on the weekend and chop it up, or I buy it already grilled and chopped. And the greens just come in a big tub, so that’s easy.” “What about the dressing?” Asks Toni. “I hate bottled salad dressing, so I make my own.” You say. “But that takes, like 3 minutes.” “Ok great.” Says Toni. “So what I want to do is just add one other salad to start. One more easy to prepare salad that doesn’t make too many dishes.” “Ok.” You say. “Then, once you get used to having two salads, you can add a third and build up slowly like that.” Says Toni. “That would make meal time more interesting.” You say. “And maybe yummier.” “Awesome.” Says Toni. “So, the one I want to show you how to make today is one of my favourite salads because it’s super flavourful and quick to make, and you can make a lot of it ahead of time so all you have to do is throw it into a bowl and go.” “Ok.” You say. “So, what’s your best self-care tip inspired by food?” Toni asks, throwing a handful of unsalted cashews and a little hot water into the food processor. [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

''“I usually try to get as many different greens in there as possible.”'' “Greens are really good for us.” Toni agrees. “Yes.” You say. “Plus, apparently they stave off cancer.” “Is that something you’re worried about?” Asks Toni. “I think it’s something everyone should be worried about.” You say boldly. “Oh? Why do you think that?” “Because the statistic is something like 1 out of 2 Canadians will be diagnosed with cancer.” You say. “That’s half the people I know.” Toni looks at you wide-eyed. “Wow, I hadn’t heard that statistic before.” She says. “You’re right. It is worrying. And it’s good to take our health seriously before there’s a problem. Food is medicine. So, let’s invent the perfect meal salad for someone who is health conscious. I don’t know about you but I like to have something warm for dinner most nights.” “Warm is comforting.” You agree. “Warm is comforting!” Says Toni. “So, one of my favourite meal salads is this smokey roasted chickpea mixture served on whatever greens you want and topped with any other delicious veggies you like. I like avocado and cherry tomatoes. Then, you put this delicious smokey, tangy, peppery dressing on it and it is the ultimate comfort food: warm, smokey, flavourful.” “That sounds delicious!” You say. Toni grins at you and hands you a piece of yellow bell pepper to nibble on. “I feel like you have a handle on how food can be a part of good self-care already.” She says. You smile. “I think I do too.” You say. “Sometimes I get stuck in a rut, but having someone to talk ideas over with or brainstorm new recipes with, is really helpful.” “So, what’s your best self-care tip inspired by a healthy eating lifestyle?” Toni asks. You think it over for a minute. [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]] “Awesome.” Says Toni. “Now, want to make a salad with me?” “Yes I do!” You say.

''“I like anything with a maple-balsamic vinaigrette.”'' “Ooh, me too!” Says Toni. “What’s the salad you usually make to go with the maple-balsamic vinaigrette?” “Baby spinach, cut up fruit like peaches or apples or pears, bell peppers, cucumber, avocado, walnuts or pecans and crumbled blue-cheese.” You say immediately. Just the thought of your favourite salad makes you feel less nervous. “That sounds delicious.” Says Toni. “Is that what you usually eat for dinner then?” “Well, some variation of that.” You say. “And I might grill a chicken breast or something to go with it, depending on how hungry I am.” “I mean, you could add almost anything to that salad and have it be delicious.” Says Toni. “Roasted chickpeas, sweet potato, stir fried beef strips, anything.” “That’s why I like it.” You say. “So, I’m super impressed that you eat salad every night.” Says Toni. “And I wonder, if you had a couple more easy dressings that you could whip up and keep in the fridge, you might branch out and try some other salads too?” You nod. “I would.” You say. “I don’t like bottled salad dressing, so I always make my own. I’m confident with mixing ingredients that go well with the balsamic-maple. I’m not so sure how good I am at mixing other flavours.” “Sometimes we get stuck in a food rut.” Says Toni. “Especially when we live alone.” “Cooking and eating alone are not as much fun.” You agree. “But it’s still good to have more in your salad stack than just the old standby.” Says Toni. “So, what I like to do is pick a few pretty versatile dressings and then invent one go-to salad for each one. Then I kind of play around with different combinations of ingredients, slowly, from there.” “Ok.” You say. “I think I can do that.” “Great!” Says Toni. “So, which dressing would you like to try first?” [[“Reliable Ranch?”]] [[“Thai inspired Sesame/peanut?”]]

''“Reliable Ranch?”'' “This one is one of my favourites.” Says Toni. “Because by just adding one or two ingredients to the basic dressing, you can make a whole new dressing!” “Handy.” You say. Toni plugs in the food processor and hands you a head of garlic and a knife. “So, how do you feel about all this?” She asks as she blends a handful of cashews and water together. “It’s been a bit of a roller coaster.” You say, chopping a couple of cloves of garlic and tossing them in the food processor. “I mean, I came here expecting to kind of bullshit my way through and like, fake-it till I made it and it turned out to be more complicated than that. But maybe, also better? I’m not sure yet.” You say. Toni laughs. “Yeah.” She says. “That about sums it up.” “I feel like I’ve caused everyone a lot of trouble and maybe hurt my chances of ever doing something like this again.” You say, adding some Dijon mustard and lemon juice to the blender. “But, on the other hand, it wasn’t too hard to get everyone on board, so maybe, overall, this is a good thing?” Toni puts a reassuring hand on your shoulder. “I think we’re all just winging it right now.” She says. “Having you as our guinea pig means we can kind of get a feel for what works before we head out and tackle a complete stranger.” You laugh. “I am a complete stranger!” You say. “Yes.” Says Toni. “But somehow, it doesn’t feel like that, you know? I think that’s why everyone agreed to Magenta’s plan. Because it already felt like we were a team.” You breathe a sigh of relief. Toni adds some spices to the food processor and pulses the mixture a few times. “Ok, taste.” She says. The dressing is creamy and garlicy with a tiny bit of tang. “Kind of tastes like a stepped-up Caesar dressing.” You say. “Right?” Says Toni. “But then if we take some out and we add a little bit of chipotle.” She passes you a spoon so you can taste the new mixture. “Ooh, it’s like a taco dressing now.” “Yeah, and then if we take some more of the base dressing and we get crazy and add some dill relish and a bit of ketchup and some hot sauce.” She holds out a spoon for you to taste. “It kind of reminds me of Thousand Island dressing.” You say. “It would be great on a Reuben sandwich. Or like a salad based on a Reuben.” “And that’s three new salads just with that one basic dressing.” Says Toni. “That’s amazing.” You say. “I could totally get behind that. Makes me excited to make dinner!” “So, what’s your food inspired self-care take-away here?” Asks Toni. [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

''“Thai inspired Sesame/peanut?”'' “Solid choice.” Says Toni. “I love this dressing on noodles.” She continues. “And then I just add whatever greens and veggies and protein I have on hand to make a meal.” You nod and watch as she pulls out the food processor and sets it up on the counter. “It’s such a creamy, comforting dressing that no matter what you put it on, you end up with a restaurant quality meal.” She says, adding sesame paste, peanut butter, honey and rice vinegar to the food processor. “You can use any kind of noodle you like as the base for this salad.” She says. “My favourite are buckwheat, but seriously, you can use a wide, flat rice noodle, or a regular spaghetti noodle or a ramen noodle. Anything.” “That seems easy enough.” You say. “I can do that.” “So, how are you feeling about all this?” She asks, handing you a pot and motioning to the sink. “Well, at first I felt really stupid.” You say, filling the pot with water. “I was sure Steve was going to fire me right away.” “It was a risk.” Agrees Toni. “I was amazed that Magenta was able to convince you all to go along with her idea, actually.” You say. “I’m still not quite sure I believe it.” “Honestly, it helps us too.” Says Toni, adding a bit of water to the food processor. “Here, chop this ginger will you?” “How so?” You ask, slicing the ginger. “It’s so easy to feel like a fraud in this kind of situation.” Says Toni. “I mean, who am I really?” “What do you mean?” “I mean, I have a small restaurant that specializes in plant-based convenience foods and I’ve had a few kitchen jobs, but I didn’t go to school to be a chef or anything. I learned to cook because my mother was a chef.” She says. “But, you have a cookbook out!” You say. “Sure, that gives me some legitimacy I guess, but anyone can write a cookbook.” Says Toni. “All I’m saying is, just because you didn’t go to school for a thing doesn’t mean you can’t become pretty good at it.” “Ok, but I don’t know anything about self-care.” You protest. “Sure you do.” Says Toni. “You take care of yourself right? You pay your rent and your bills. You get yourself to work. You maintain relationships with friends. You go out and do things outside of work. You make food for yourself and take time to chill. That’s all self-care is.” “That’s not all it is.” You say. “Some of it is lotions and make-up and skin care and meditating. I don’t know a thing about any of that. If you took me to a store and asked me which face cream to buy, I would just have to guess.” “Sure.” Says Toni. “Because that’s all anyone is doing. They try a few, decide on their favourites and that’s what they recommend to people. That’s what I’m doing with these dressings. Do you know how to research?” “Yes.” You say. “Then, you can figure out the rest as you need to.” Says Toni. “I think what we all like about the idea behind this show is that no one is expected to be perfect or to know everything there is to know. We just have to be able to figure it out as we need it. And we’ll have help!” You look at Toni in astonishment. “You know.” You say. “I just never thought about it like that.” “Pasta.” Says Toni. “Gets the brain working every time.” You laugh. Toni hands you a spoon so you can taste the dressing. It is thick and creamy and sweet and spicy. “That is delicious.” You say. “I could eat that on so many things.” “Well today we’re going to eat it on buckwheat pasta with spiralized veggies on a bed of baby arugula.” Says Tony, loading up two plates with the salad ingredients and drizzling the dressing on top. “This has been a really helpful session.” You say with your mouth full of noodle. “I really appreciated hearing your perspective.” “So, what’s your food inspired self-care take-away here?” Asks Toni. [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

''“I’m a grazer.”'' “Ok.” Says Toni. “What does that look like for you. Because that can be a really healthy option or a really unhealthy option depending on how you do it.” [[“I carry a variety of protein bars around in my bag.”]] [[“I snack on fruit and veggies and nuts all day and try to eat something more substantial for dinner.”]] [[“I just grab something quick each time I go and get a coffee.”]]

''Tastes from Around the World: Vegan Shepherd’s Pie with Rock Your Socks off Vegan Gravy, Whole Roasted Cauliflower with Butter Curry Sauce, Three Bean Chili with Chocolate.'' “Good choice!” Says Toni enthusiastically. “What made you decide to go with that one?” “Growing up, my parents made a lot of international foods.” You say. “I’d forgotten how much I like those bold, interesting flavours. If they were easy to make, I would be happy making and eating that.” “See.” Says Toni. “It just took a tiny bit of thinking about it for you to be able to make a choice that fits with the tastes you already like in a way that would make cooking those foods manageable.” “I guess there’s a solution to every problem.” You say. “That’s right.” Says Toni. “It just takes a moment of slowing down and actually thinking about things.” She opens the fridge and pulls out a stack of bowls and containers. “So, in addition to a meal prep service, I’m also going to show you how to cook a few, easy meals for yourself.” She says. “I’m a big fan of one-pot meals, where you just throw everything into one pot and it all cooks together. Plus, that way you have leftovers you can freeze for later if you are super busy and don’t have the time to make anything. How does that sound?” “That sounds great!” You say. “Sometimes I find that everyday cooking for one isn’t very much fun.” Toni gives an excited little shiver. “I promise, this is going to be fun!” She says enthusiastically. “So, what self-care lesson have you learned here?” [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

''Dinner salad in a jar: Smokey Chickpea and spinach salad with spicy paprika vinaigrette, Samosa inspired potato-salad with arugula and spicy lime curry vinaigrette, Sesame noodles with spiralized carrot and cucumber and ginger tahini dressing.'' “Good choice!” Says Toni enthusiastically. “What made you decide to go with that one?” “Well first of all, food in a jar is really appealing.” You say. “True.” Says Toni. “Plus it feels like you could make a bunch at once and keep them in the fridge to eat whenever and that cuts down on cooking in the evenings. I like that.” You add. “Good.” Says Toni. “Plus, if it were easy to grab a jar out of the fridge and just warm it up or add a dressing or something I would be way more inclined to eat something healthy.” Toni nods. “I totally get that.” She says. “When we live alone sometimes the motivation isn’t there to cook a big meal just for one.” “And these flavours look delicious.” You say. “Kind of international inspired and I love international foods.” “Great!” Says Toni. “See, there’s a solution to every problem! Now we’re going to try to actually make one.” “Really?” You say. “Which one?" “The Samosa inspired potato salad.” Says Toni. “Now, how are you at peeling potatoes?” You laugh and take the potato peeler from her outstretched hand. The finished salad is a delicious combination of fragrant, curry- spiced potatoes, chickpeas, mint, coconut and lime. You crush some roasted peanuts on top and take a bite. “So good.” You say. Toni nods. “Right. And so easy, even from scratch.” She says. “Plus, it makes great leftovers to stuff in a roti or pita pocket.” “It’s definitely a step up from what I would usually have.” You agree. “And it doesn’t feel like I’ve cooked a meal for 6 only to have to eat it by myself.” “So, what self-care lesson have you learned here?” Says Toni. [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

''Gourmet Made Easy: Grilled Chicken with Lemon-butter sauce and sauteed broccoli on a bed of fresh linguine pasta, Smokey Mac N Cheese bake with roasted garlic topping, Ratatouille with fresh andouille sausage and grilled chicken breasts.'' “Good choice!” Says Toni enthusiastically. “What made you decide to go with that one?” “Those all sound like comfort foods.” You say, a bit sheepishly. “I eat alone in front of the TV most nights! Comfort food seems like the right choice.” Toni laughs. “Hey, there’s nothing wrong with comfort food!” She says. “These are great staple recipes and they make terrific leftovers.” “I love me a leftover.” You agree. “Me too!” Says Toni, pulling a bunch of containers out of the fridge. “So today, we’re going to make the Smokey Mac N Cheese Bake.” She hands you a large pot. “I assume you know how to boil water?” “Listen, it’s not that bad!” You say feigning offense. “Good, because this recipe basically comes together while the noodles are boiling.” Says Toni. “Then you throw it all in a casserole dish and bake it for 20 minutes and you have dinner.” “Sounds great.” “So, have you learned anything here that you might be able to use as our Self-Care Stylist?” [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

''“I snack on fruit and veggies and nuts all day and try to eat something more substantial for dinner.”'' “Ok.” Says Toni. “So mostly just raw fruits and veggies and nuts?” “I often dip the veggies in hummus or guacamole.” You add. Toni nods. “And what about dinner? What do you do for dinner?” “I order out a few times a week.” You admit. “Or, I make something easy, like quesadillas or a sandwich.” “That doesn’t sound exciting at all.” Says Toni. “It isn’t.” You agree. “But, I live alone and cooking for one is not my favourite.” “I get that.” Says Toni. “So, how about I teach you a few easy recipes you could try at home.” You look at her skeptically. “I promise they are not hard and they are fast and delicious.” You shrug. “Sure.” You say. “I’m game.” “What would you like to make today?” Asks Toni. [[“Japanese ramen.”]] [[“Thai curry.”]] [[“Mac and Cheese.”]]

''“I just grab something quick each time I go and get a coffee.” Toni nods.'' “So, like one of those packaged Starbucks boxes or something?” “Yeah, or a sandwich or a muffin. Whatever looks good.” You say with a shrug. “So tell me.” says Toni. “Does that seem like a good self-care habit?” You smile wryly and shrug a single shoulder. “I guess not.” You hedge. Toni flashes her big, green eyes at you. “It’s not.” She snaps. “And we owe our ''Stars'' authenticity at the very least. We can’t ask them to do things we ourselves are not doing already. Can you understand how it looks bad if you are not practicing good self-care yourself?” You nod. “So you need to step up your game if you want to be a part of this team.” Says Toni sternly. “Lots of things in life are genuinely hard. But taking good care of yourself is not one of those things. That’s something everyone can and should do. And we’re going to be emphasizing that in our sessions with our ''Stars'', so you need to get on board with that.” “Sorry.” You say, taken aback. “I do think it’s important. I just…never paid a lot of attention to it before. But I’m willing to listen and learn.” Toni nods her head curtly and pulls open the fridge. You feel like your chance to join this wonderful team of women slipping away. “I guess my life has felt kind of pointless for a while now.” You say. “I just stopped paying attention to things like health and self-care and spent my time stressing instead.” Toni’s shoulders relax and she smiles at you. “Listen, I get it.” She says. “We all have times like that.” “I’m happy to take whatever advice you have to offer.” You say hopefully. “Good.” Says Toni. “Then today, I’m going to teach you how to make a couple of easy, delicious, healthy meals that you can make at home, and that make great leftovers for lunches.” She pulls open the fridge and hands you a stack of containers. “The important thing is to not change too many things too fast.” She says. “If you change one small thing at a time and let that change become a habit before changing something else, there’s a much better chance that the changes will last.” “That makes sense.” You say. “So, since you like sandwiches and wraps and things, we’re going to make something that you can either eat as a wrap or as a meal with rice or noodles or something.” Says Toni. “How does that sound?” “That sounds awesome! Then I could take leftovers for lunch.” You say. “It’s like a two in one deal.” Toni laughs. “Right.” She says. “So what would you like to make today?” [[Smokey vegetarian chili]] [[Samosa potato salad]] [[Lentil larb]]

''“Japanese ramen.”'' “So you’re in luck!” Says Toni, pulling open the fridge and handing you a stack of containers. “There are several ramen food boxes you can subscribe to that would be perfect for you. You can order just once in a while or you can have an ongoing subscription and all the ingredients come prepared. You just have to follow the instructions and throw them together.” She pulls a large pot out of the cupboard and puts it on the stove. “Yes.” You say. “I could probably manage that.” “The point is, not to give up too easily.” Says Toni. “There is a solution to every problem. It’s a good idea to make that your mantra.” She hands you a head of garlic. "Peel and chop that for me will you?" She says. You get started on the garlic while Toni grates a large piece of ginger into a neat pile. “You just have to start slowly and work your way up.” She says, pouring a generous amount of oil into the pot and turning on the heat. “Start with one thing that you can easily manage and once you get good at that, add another thing." She throws your garlic and the giner into the pot and gives it a quick stir. Then she tosses in a handful of sliced mushrooms and a small spoonful of red paste. "What's that?" You ask. "This is just a bit of red curry paste." She says. "We're just going to fry it in the oil a bit and then we'll add some vegetable broth." She grabs a box of broth off a shelf and pours into the pot. "This is my personal ramen recipe." She explains as she adds some soy sauce, brown sugar, black bean paste and hoison sauce to the pot. The broth turns a rich brownish-red colour and the kitchen fills with a creamy, spicy-sweet smell. "That smells good!" You say appreciatively. Toni grins. "And now we're going to add some cubes of fried tofu, some sugar snap peas and some bok choy." She says, holding up each ingredient as she adds it. "And then, we add the noodles." She pours in a container of pre-cooked noodles. "I usually prepare all the ingredients in advance so that I can throw together a quick ramen any time I feel like it." She explains, giving the pot a gentle stir. Ready.” She turns off the stove, pulls out two bowls and ladles the mixture into them. “Taste.” She says. You take a small, tentative bite. The mixture is tangy, sweet, a little spicy and very flavourful. “Wow!” You say. “It’s delicious!” “It’s just a simple ramen.” Says Tony. “And we cooked it in 20 minutes while we were chatting.” You nod and take another bite. “I could do that!” You say. “Plus it makes great leftovers.” Says Toni. You grin at her and take another bite. “So.” Says Toni. “Have you learned anything here that you might be able to use as our Self-Care Stylist?” [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

''“Thai curry.”'' “Great choice!” Says Toni, pulling open the fridge. “And today, as a special surprise, we are going to make one from scratch!” You groan softly. “Don’t you like cooking?” Asks Toni. “It’s not that I don’t like cooking.” You say. “It’s that cooking for one feels like a lot of unnecessary work when there’s take out.” Toni hands you a pile of containers and smiles sympathetically. “I promise, this will be fun.” She pulls out a large pot and plunks it on the stove. “Part of good self-care is taking care of your health, so it’s important that you embrace this chance.” You nod. “I’ll try.” You say. You watch as Toni opens a can of coconut milk and pours a small amount into the bottom of the pot. She opens a jar of red paste and adds some to the coconut milk. A delicious sweet, smokey, spicey smell fills the kitchen and makes your mouth water. “What’s that red stuff?” You ask. “Red curry paste.” Says Toni. “And it is the secret to a terrific Thai curry at home. You just add however much you want to some coconut milk, throw in your protein and veggies and a bit of broth and cook until the veggies are tender.” “That’s it?” You say incredulously. “It tastes like it’s way more complicated than that!” Toni smiles at you. “One of the things I love about cooking is that you can make something that tastes like it came from an expensive restaurant but that is super simple to make.” She hands you a block of tofu wrapped in paper towels. “Just cut that up into cubes for me, will you?” She asks. “We can throw it in just cut up like that but we’re actually going to stir fry it a bit first, just to give it some crispiness.” You put the brick of tofu on a cutting board and cut it into small, even cubes. It feels almost like a meditation. Toni scrapes the cubes off the board and into a waiting frying pan, where they spit and sizzle to life. A few minutes later they are browned and crisp. Toni throws them into the pot along with some broccoli and red peppers. She gives the mixture a quick stir and turns the heat down. “We’ll just give that a few minutes and then we’ll be ready to taste it.” She says. You nod slowly, in appreciation. “It’s really that easy?” You ask. “Just one step at a time.” Says Toni. “I try to enjoy every step of the process and not stress about what is to come. Plus, smelling the food cooking makes me very excited to get to eat it.” “Me too!” You laugh. “I could totally make this instead of getting take out.” Toni nods and peeks into the pot. “So, have you learned anything here that you might be able to use as our Self-Care Stylist?” [[“You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.”]] [[“It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.”]] [[“Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.”]]

''You step outside in the late afternoon light.'' It has been a day full of surprises. You take a deep breath of fresh air and try to settle your thoughts. Just as you are debating whether or not you should head to the canteen for a latte you see Steve striding across the lot towards you, clipboard in hand. “There you are.” He says. “Come with me. The others are waiting for you in the Commissary.” You follow him at a brisk trot through the village of trailers. The Commissary is packed with people when you arrive. “What’s going on?” You ask. “We feed everyone a good afternoon snack at this time every day. Crew from the night shift have just arrived and this gives everyone a chance to socialize and eat before the day crew goes home and the night crew gets to work.” Says Steve. You glance at people’s plates as Steve weaves his way between the tables towards the back of the hall. Pizza, spaghetti and meatballs, omlettes, salads, cookies, cakes, crackers and cheese, and fruit are just some of the things you glimpse as you scramble to keep up. “It looks more like a meal than a snack.” You remark to Steve. He shrugs. “For some of the crew, this is their first meal of the day. For some of the performers, this is their dinner. Or some people just need a quick snack before their evening begins. We try to cater to as many needs as we can.” Says Steve. “Here we are.” Magenta stands up as you arrive at the table and pulls out a chair for you to sit in. “Thanks.” You say. You sit down across from Alexa, who gives you a single, disdainful glance before returning to the huge plate of salad she is eating. Steve sits next to her and sets his clipboard down on the table. “So, we have quickly reviewed the footage from today, and it looks good. I think it’s going to be a good first episode. We have to reshoot some sequences tomorrow, just to get in some other camera angles and options, but overall, it looks good. What did you guys think? Is Vanessa going to be able to play the role of Self-Care Stylist?” You anxiously pick at your thumbnail and look around the table. Everyone seems to be smiling and nodding. Finally, Magenta speaks up: “I think she’s going to be brilliant.” She says. “Today was a hard and stressful day for her but she took it all in and worked well with each of us.” There are murmurs of agreement around the table. Steve looks at you. “And what do you think?” He asks. “Do you think you can keep up?” You take a deep breath. [[“I’m sure I can.”]] [[“I have a lot to learn but I’ll give my best shot.”]] [[“Today was really great, but I’m not sure I can keep up with these guys.”]]

''“I’m sure I can.”'' “I’m sure I can.” You say. “If today has taught me anything it’s that the choices you make can be simple but can also make a big difference. I have learned so much today! And I really appreciate the opportunity to continue working with these wonderful women.” There is a small round of applause around the table and you feel your face burn with pleasure and embarrassment. “We’re all really proud of you, Vanessa.” Says Grey. “Yes.” Says Robbie. “You took a stupid, selfish decision and turned it into a win. I’m excited to get to work with you.” There are murmurs of agreement all around the table. “Just remember.” Says Steve. “You can always ask for help.” “And don’t forget to take your time.” Says Robbie. “And focus on what’s right in front of you.” Adds Kerry. “We’ve got your back.” Says Magenta. “Remember, we’re a team and we are all here to help each other.” “We succeed or fail together.” Says Toni. Alexa looks up from her plate. “Don’t blow it Johnson.” She says darkly. “That’s all I’m saying.” Steve gives her an exasperated look. Alexa glares back at him and then puts down her fork and looks straight into your eyes. “Fine. Welcome to the Sensational Six: Kweens with Krowns.” She says. There is a small cheer around the table and someone hands you a glass of orange juice. “Cheers Kweens!” “Thanks.” You say, nodding appreciatively at each woman before clinking your glass against theirs. “It’s been our pleasure.” Says Grey. [[See your self-care style]]

''“I have a lot to learn but I’ll give my best shot.”'' “Ok.” Says Steve smiling at you approvingly. “You can always ask for help.” He says. “And don’t forget to take your time.” Says Robbie. “And focus on what’s right in front of you.” Adds Kerry. “We’ve got your back.” Says Magenta. “Remember, we’re a team and we are all here to help each other.” “We succeed or fail together.” Says Toni. “I’m proud of you, kiddo.” Says Grey. “You took a big risk today and I think it was the start of something incredible!” Lots of hands reach over and pat you on the back and you marvel at your good fortune and the generosity of these terrific women. Alexa looks up from her plate. “Don’t blow it Johnson.” She says darkly. “That’s all I’m saying. Do not blow this chance, because it could very well be the last one you ever get.” Steve kicks her leg under the table. Alexa glowers at him and then puts down her fork and looks straight into your eyes. “Fine. Welcome to the Sensational Six: Kweens without Krowns.” “Thank you.” You whisper to Magenta. “Any time.” She whispers back. [[See your self-care style]]

''“Today was really great, but I’m not sure I can keep up with these guys.”'' “It will not be easy.” Says Alexa, not looking up from her plate. There are nods all around the table. “It’s completely up to you.” Says Steve. “If you choose to stay, we will do everything we can to help you succeed and if you choose to leave, we will not hold it against you.” “But, we would be disappointed.” Says Magenta, raising a perfect eyebrow at you. “Of course, we want you to choose to stay.” Says Grey. “I, for one was very impressed with you today.” This is accompanied by a chorus of “yesses”. “It won’t be easy though.” Says Toni. “Besides actually doing the show, you will have to learn a lot of new skills, maybe even go back to school or take some extra training.” You think this over carefully for a moment and then: [[Decide you can’t continue with the show]] [[Decide to continue with the show]]

''Decide you can’t continue with the show'' “I just don’t think I have it in me.” You say weakly. “I have so much respect and admiration for you all and I’m sorry to be letting everyone down. But, I can’t go through with this. It’s just too hard.” “Are you sure?” Magenta asks. You nod. Magenta sighs. “I’m really sorry to hear that Vanessa.” She says. “I hope it doesn’t hurt your chances to do what you want in the future.” Grey shakes her head and walks slowly back to the table. Toni looks at you sternly. “I think this is the wrong decision.” She says. “There’s a solution to every problem and running away is not one of them.” You look around the table at the sad, disappointed faces and catch sight of Alexa’s glower. She raises her eyebrows and flashes her eyes at you. “If you think I’m going to give you a pep talk and beg you to stay…” She says. Steve puts a firm hand on her shoulder and shakes his head. “Listen.” He says. “What I’m hearing around the table is that everyone here thinks you can do this and wants you to do this. Do you think you can do this?” [[You shake your head sadly.]] [[You smile and nod]]

''Decide to continue with the show'' “Ok.” You say. “I’ll do it.” There is a chorus of cheering around the table. Lots of hands reach over and pat you on the back and you marvel at your good fortune and the generosity of these terrific women. Alexa looks up from her plate. “Don’t blow it Johnson.” She says darkly. “That’s all I’m saying. Do not blow this chance, because it could very well be the last one you ever get.” Steve kicks her leg under the table. Alexa glowers at him and then puts down her fork and looks straight into your eyes. “Fine. Welcome to the Sensational Six: Kweens without Krowns.” “Thank you.” You say softly. “Yeah, yeah.” Mutters Alexa, returning to her salad. Magenta gives you a wink and Grey smiles at you and rolls her eyes. What have you gotten yourself into? [[See your self-care style]]

''You shake your head sadly.'' “Sorry.” You say again. You turn and walk out of the Commissary. You look up at the sky for a long moment and then take the long winding path through the village of trailers to the edge of the parking lot. You step over the parking barrier and head home. It’s a nice day for a walk. End [[Credits]]

''You smile and nod'' “Ok.” You say. “I’ll do it.” There is a chorus of cheering around the table. Lots of hands reach over and pat you on the back and you marvel at your good fortune and the generosity of these terrific women. “That’s great news!” Says Magenta, beaming up at you. Alexa looks up from her plate. “Don’t blow it Johnson.” She says darkly. “That’s all I’m saying. Do not blow this chance, because it could very well be the last one you ever get.” Steve kicks her leg under the table. Toni stands and raises her glass of orange juice in a toast. “To the Sensational Six.” She says. “ Kweens with Krowns.” End [[Credits]]

''A barbie shoe, a small hand saw, and a church bulletin'' Kerry picks up the items one by one and examines them for a moment. “So, these are unusual things for a person to carry around wherever they go.” She says. “I wonder why you are holding onto these things?” You shrug sheepishly. “For example.” She says holding up the church bulletin. “What is the significance of this?” She opens the bulletin and glances through the order of service inside. “Do you attend this church?” She asks. “Was this some kind of special service?” You shake your head, embarrassed. “That blew under my skirt on my way home from work one day.” You say. “So, I just stuffed it in my bag.” Kerry nods. “Ok, that can go, then.” She tosses the bulletin onto the floor and holds up the hand saw. “And this?” “Well, you never know when you’re going to have to get out of a tight spot.” You say kind of defensively. “Or, you know, trim a stray tree branch.” Kerry tilts her head and looks at you, confused. “Do you do a lot of tree branch trimming when you are out and about?” She asks. “Oh, uh, no, not really.” You say. “So, then hold this in your hand and tell me if it Ignites Happiness for you.” She says. “Just close your eyes for a moment and see how it makes you feel to hold this tiny saw in your hand.” You take the saw, sheepishly, and do what she says. “So?” She asks when you open your eyes again. [[We can let it go.]] [[I would like to keep it.]]

''A kazoo, a pen that looks like an octopus tentacle and a Tamagotchi'' Kerry holds up the kazoo and gives you a questioning look. “What even is this?” She asks. You open your mouth in shock. “You don’t know what a kazoo is?” You gasp. Kerry examines the kazoo for a moment. “I think I got one once at birthday party when I was a kid.” She says. You nod. “So, why do you have one in your bag?” She asks. You straighten your back and look her directly in the eye. “You never know when you might need a kazoo.” You say firmly. Kerry looks at you with a bemused expression on her face. You press on. “For example, it might be someone’s birthday and you might need to do a Jazz rendition of 'Happy Birthday' for the occasion.” You say. “Or, you know, someone might need a fanfare of 'Horses at the Starting Gate' just to get going. Or you might need a spontaneous “ta-da” or a drum roll. You can do it all if you have a kazoo.” Kerry presses her lips tightly together and inhales deeply through her nose but it’s no use. She cannot contain her laughter. You sit back in your chair and scratch at your eyebrow until she is finished. “So.” She says, wiping her eyes and handing you the kazoo. “Keep or toss?” [[Keep]] [[Toss]]

''3 stain remover pens, an origami rabbit, and some unfinished knitting'' Kerry picks up the origami rabbit and looks at it fondly. “I used to make these all the time when I was small.” She says. You nod. “I fold them while I ride the bus.” You explain. “Then usually I leave them somewhere for someone else to find.” Kerry smiles. “That’s fun.” She says. “I’m sure a lot of them perish in the weather.” You admit sadly. “But I imagine that they go on to have meaningful origami rabbit lives with their new families.” A worried expression flashes across Kerry’s face. “Just kidding.” You say. “It’s just something to do with my hands while I wait for my stop.” Kerry laughs. “Ok good.” She says. “I was worried for a minute.” She looks at the rabbit again and then holds him over the growing pile on the floor. “So, he can go?” She asks. “Yes.” You say. Kerry hesitates for a moment and then tucks the rabbit into her pocket. “Actually, maybe I’ll hold onto him for a while.” She says. “He Ignites Happiness for me right now. But these?” She holds up the stain remover pens. “Hey, those are practical!” You protest. Kerry nods. “They are.” She says. “But why do you need three?” “They came in a pack of three.” You say defensively. Kerry grins and hands them back to you. “Ok. What I suggest is this: keep one in your bag and put the other ones in a drawer in your bathroom for when you need to replace the one in your bag.” You nod and stuff the stain remover pens back into your bag. “And now, this.” Says Kerry, holding up the tangle of unfinished knitting. “Right, that.” You agree. Kerry raises her eyebrows at you. “I thought I should learn how to knit.” You say. “It’s supposed to be meditative. Also, I wait in lines a lot and I thought it would keep me from getting bored.” “But?” Kerry prompts. “But, I could never make it further than about 4 inches without dropping a stitch or making a mistake and there are only so many headbands and scarves you can knit before your house gets taken over by wool…” Kerry nods sympathetically. “So, hang onto it or let it go?” She asks, handing you the knitting. [[Hang onto it]] [[Let it go]]

''We can let it go.'' “Great!” Says Kerry. She tosses the saw on top of the church bulletin on the floor and holds up the Barbie shoe. “And this?” She asks. You shake your head. “That can go.” You say firmly. You aren’t even sure how you come to have a Barbie shoe in your bag. Kerry drops the Barbie shoe onto the floor and rifles through the detritus on the table. “We can just throw away all these old receipts and, are these pages from plays?” She asks. “Do you need to keep those?” You shake your head. “Anything that’s garbage is tossed.” She says firmly, sweeping a large pile of wrappers, concert tickets, receipts, and wadded up tissues onto the floor. Then she separates out: [[3 Nerf bullets, a locket with a picture of someone else’s child in it, a Sheriff’s badge, and a telescopic back scratcher.|Nerf]] [[A flashlight, a small bottle of hot sauce, a Rubiks Cube, and a sewing kit|Flashlight]] [[A tiny traffic cone, a clown nose, a lice comb and a sponge.|Traffic cone]]

''I would like to keep it.'' “Ok.” She says handing it to you. You put it back in your bag and feel a small thrill of satisfaction, like you’ve just accomplished something notable but you don’t know what. It’s not something you feel very often and you take a moment to bask in the glow before turning your attention back to Kerry. She nods at you in what you interpret as a pleased way and then picks up: [[3 Nerf bullets, a locket with a picture of someone else’s child in it, a Sheriff’s badge, and a telescopic back scratcher.|Nerf]] [[A flashlight, a small bottle of hot sauce, a Rubiks Cube, and a sewing kit|Flashlight]] [[A tiny traffic cone, a clown nose, a lice comb and a sponge.|Traffic cone]]

''3 Nerf bullets, a locket with a picture of someone else’s child in it, a Sheriff’s badge, and a telescopic back scratcher.'' “The Nerf bullets can go.” You say before Kerry can ask. “I don’t even remember how I have those.” Kerry tosses the bullets onto the pile and holds up the locket. “Oh.” You say. “That was a gift from a high school friend.” Kerry opens the locket and looks inside. “And this child?” You shake your head. “No idea?” You say. “It was one of those Secret Santa type events.” “And you’ve held onto it since high school?” Says Kerry. You nod. “Why?” “Oh, I don’t know.” You say quietly. “It was a gift. It was pretty. I thought one day…” Kerry nods. “And now?” She asks. “Oh, we can let it go.” You say firmly. “I don’t really know why I was hanging onto it.” Kerry smiles and drops it on the pile. She picks up the Sheriff’s badge and holds it out to you. You shake your head. “That can go.” “And this?” Kerry holds up the telescopic back scratcher. [[“I love that!” You say.]] [[“It’s kind of a fun thing, don’t you think?”]]

''A flashlight, a small bottle of hot sauce, a Rubiks Cube, and a sewing kit'' You look thoughtfully at the pile in front of you and pick up the Rubiks Cube. “These were so popular in my theatre program.” You tell Kerry. “We all carried Rubiks Cubes around with us everywhere we went to guard against boredom.” Kerry nods. “I’m seeing that that is a recurring theme.” She says. “You have a lot of things in your bag that you hope will stop you from becoming bored. Are you often bored?” You shrug. “I think my life is less interesting than I would like it to be.” You say. “When you’re a kid there are so many interesting things to do and to look at but when you’re an adult, you do a lot of waiting around.” Kerry nods and holds up the hot sauce. “Keeping that!” You say immediately. “I am not a fan of food without flavour. With hot sauce, you can always add flavour.” Kerry nods and hands you the bottle. “And this?” She asks holding up the flashlight. “What? You don’t think a flashlight could come in handy?” You ask, a bit defensively. Kerry unscrews the battery compartment and pours out two ancient, leaky batteries. She raises her eyebrows at you. “Ok.” You say, resigned. “It can go.” Kerry drops it on the pile and picks up the sewing kit. “Ah.” She says. “Everyone seems to have at least one of these things.” You nod. “I have never used it.” You admit. “It might have come with the bag.” Kerry grins and drops it on the pile. “I have never met anyone who has actually used one.” She says, winking at you. “So, all we’re left with now is your good friend, the Rubiks Cube.” You close your eyes and hold the Rubiks Cube in your hands. [[I’m keeping it]] [[I don’t need to keep it]]

''A tiny traffic cone, a clown nose, a lice comb and a sponge.'' You gaze down at the pile of things in front of you and waffle between embarrassment and amusement. You pick up the lice comb and toss it onto the pile on the floor. “Gross.” You mutter to yourself. “I was wondering about that.” Says Kerry, pursing her lips. “Yeah, don’t ask.” You say bitterly. “I work at a salon and sometimes parents…” You trail off. “Anyway, sometimes a lice comb is a work hazard. But this one has combed its last louse.” “We won’t speak of it again.” Says Kerry with mock gravity. She picks up the sponge and holds it up. “Is this for, like, doing dishes?” She asks. “You never know when you might have to mop up a spill?” You try lamely. Kerry shakes her head and drops the sponge on the pile. Then she picks up the tiny traffic cone and the clown nose. “Now I will say, I’m intrigued by these.” She says. You smile and reach for the clown nose. “My friends and I sometimes wear these to the bar.” You explain. “It just makes the night a bit more fun.” Kerry raises her eyebrows at you questioningly. “Really.” You say. “I can’t explain. But you try putting on a clown nose with 6 of your closest friends and going out to a cool bar. It puts a different spin on the evening. Clown noses make your face look very cute.” Kerry laughs. “Ok.” She says. “You can keep it. But what about this?” She holds up the tiny traffic cone. “I have a friend who makes these miniature street installations.” You tell her. “She needed 2 little traffic cones for one of them but all we could find was a party-sized bag , so she gave one to each of her friends. We are supposed to look for somewhere interesting to leave it where it would make an impact.” Kerry nods, interested. “So, you haven’t found a good place yet?” She asks. You let out a laugh that is more of a wry snort. “Actually, I can think of a million places to leave it.” You say. “But I forgot I had it. It got lost in all the debris.” Kerry hands you the traffic cone. “Thanks.” You say, tucking it into your bag. “I’ll leave it somewhere on my way home tonight, so I don’t forget about it again.” “Super.” Says Kerry. “And look! Only one more pile to go!” She holds up: [[A broken mouse trap, a tiny battery powered fan, and a dryer sheet.|Mouse trap]] [[The folded articles you grabbed at breakfast this morning, a compass, and a dog tooth brush|Articles]] [[Tea lights, a tiny motherboard, and a robot glove|Tea lights]]

''Keep'' “Keep.” You say firmly. Kerry grins and hands you the kazoo. “I guessed that’s what you would pick.” She says. “And it’s interesting. I’m starting to get a much better sense of the kind of person you are. You must be a lot of fun at parties.” “I am.” You agree, grinning back. “Now, what about this?” Asks Kerry holding up the pen shaped like an octopus tentacle. “I love that!” You say. “That’s my favourite pen!” Kerry hands you the pen to put back into your bag. “Out of curiosity.” She says. “Why is that your favourite pen?” You smile and shrug. “It’s fun. It’s unique. Not everyone will have a pen like this.” Kerry nods. “All good reasons to keep it.” She says. “And this?” She holds up the Tamagotchi. You shake your head sadly. “It died and then the batteries leaked and he could never be revived.” You explain. Kerry nods and drops it onto the pile. “Goodbye Skippy.” You say regretfully. “You were a good Tamagotchi.” Kerry laughs. “You’re doing great here.” She says. “So, now what about these?” She holds up: [[3 Nerf bullets, a locket with a picture of someone else’s child in it, a Sheriff’s badge, and a telescopic back scratcher.|Nerf]] [[A flashlight, a small bottle of hot sauce, a Rubiks Cube, and a sewing kit|Flashlight]] [[A tiny traffic cone, a clown nose, a lice comb and a sponge.|Traffic cone]]

''Toss'' Kerry looks at you in surprise. “Really?” She says. “I was sure you would keep this one.” You shake your head. “It sounds good in theory.” You say. “But I never actually use it.” Kerry nods. “Good choice then.” She says, tossing it on top of the pile on the floor. “And, what about this?” She says holding up the pen shaped like an octopus tentacle. “I love that!” You say. “That’s my favourite pen!” Kerry hands you the pen to put back into your bag. “Out of curiosity.” She says. “Why is that your favourite pen?” You smile and shrug. “It’s fun. It’s unique. Not everyone will have a pen like this.” Kerry nods. “All good reasons to keep it.” She says. “And this?” She holds up the Tamagotchi. You shake your head sadly. “It died and then the batteries leaked and he could never be revived.” You explain. Kerry nods and drops it onto the pile. “Goodbye Skippy.” You say regretfully. “You were a good Tamagotchi.” Kerry laughs. “You’re doing great here.” She says. “So, now what about these?” She holds up: [[3 Nerf bullets, a locket with a picture of someone else’s child in it, a Sheriff’s badge, and a telescopic back scratcher.|Nerf]] [[A flashlight, a small bottle of hot sauce, a Rubiks Cube, and a sewing kit|Flashlight]] [[A tiny traffic cone, a clown nose, a lice comb and a sponge.|Traffic cone]]

''Hang onto it'' “Interesting.” Says Kerry. “I think I’d like to try again.” You say. “I didn’t try very hard last time. It seems like a shame to get rid of something before giving it a solid try.” “But does it Ignite Happiness?” Asks Kerry. “Yes.” You say. “It does.” You tuck the knitting back into your bag. “Ok, what’s next?” You ask. You are starting to understand how this process might be helpful. Kerry picks up: [[3 Nerf bullets, a locket with a picture of someone else’s child in it, a Sheriff’s badge, and a telescopic back scratcher.|Nerf]] [[A flashlight, a small bottle of hot sauce, a Rubiks Cube, and a sewing kit|Flashlight]] [[A tiny traffic cone, a clown nose, a lice comb and a sponge.|Traffic cone]]

''Let it go'' Kerry nods in agreement and drops it onto the pile on the floor. “Great!” She says. “How are you feeling now?” “Better.” You say. “Lighter. Less anxious.” Kerry nods. “That’s what happens when we get rid of the things that are no longer Igniting Happiness for us.” She says, looking pleased. “Ok, what’s next?” You ask, leaning forward in your chair. Kerry picks up: [[3 Nerf bullets, a locket with a picture of someone else’s child in it, a Sheriff’s badge, and a telescopic back scratcher.|Nerf]] [[A flashlight, a small bottle of hot sauce, a Rubiks Cube, and a sewing kit|Flashlight]] [[A tiny traffic cone, a clown nose, a lice comb and a sponge.|Traffic cone]]

''“I love that!” You say.'' “Ok!” Says Kerry handing it to you. You pull it open and hand it back to her. “I know you probably think it’s a silly thing to keep, but just try it.” You say. Kerry takes the back scratcher and apprehensively dangles it over one shoulder. She lightly scratches her back a few times. You watch as her face goes from apprehensive to appreciative. “Wow!” She says, handing it back to you. “That felt so good! Such a satisfying back scratch!” “Right?!” You say, collapsing it and tucking it into your bag. “There’s always that one spot you can’t reach.” Kerry laughs. “Ok.” She says. “You’re getting pretty good at this now, so tell me, how do you feel about these?” She picks up: [[A broken mouse trap, a tiny battery powered fan, and a dryer sheet.|Mouse trap]] [[The folded articles you grabbed at breakfast this morning, a compass, and a dog tooth brush|Articles]] [[Tea lights, a tiny motherboard, and a robot glove|Tea lights]]

''“It’s kind of a fun thing, don’t you think?”'' “It is.” Says Kerry. “But that’s not the important thing. The important thing is whether or not it Ignites Happiness. Remember, we are trying to let go of what we no longer need.” You nod and hold the backscratcher in your hands one more time. “I don’t think I need to keep it.” You say, handing it back to Kerry. “Great!” She says. “You are doing really well. So, this is the last batch of things to consider.” She holds up: [[A broken mouse trap, a tiny battery powered fan, and a dryer sheet.|Mouse trap]] [[The folded articles you grabbed at breakfast this morning, a compass, and a dog tooth brush|Articles]] [[Tea lights, a tiny motherboard, and a robot glove|Tea lights]]

''A broken mouse trap, a tiny battery powered fan, and a dryer sheet.'' Kerry picks up the broken mouse trap and raises her eyebrows at you. “Do you have mouse problems in your bag?” She asks dropping it onto the pile. You roll your eyes and pick up the fan. “This, I’m keeping.” You say firmly. Kerry nods her head and reaches for the dryer sheet. “Why do you have a single dryer sheet in your bag?” She asks. “A dryer sheet is one of the most useful household items you can carry.” You say in your best infomercial voice. “Oh?” “Yes.” You insist. “Imagine you are somewhere hot and you forgot to put on deodorant. You don’t want to stink up the place, so you can run this on your clothes to freshen them up.” Kerry raises her eyebrows at you and shakes her head. “No…” “Or.” You interrupt her. “Let’s say your hair is really staticky and you don’t have any leave-in conditioner with you. You can rub the dryer sheet on your hair to eliminate the static.” Kerry is still shaking her head. “Or.” You press on. “If your shoes are squeaky, you can rub the dryer sheet against the treads and the squeak will disappear.” “Is that true?” Kerry demands. You shrug. “I’ve never tried the shoe trick.” You admit. Kerry smiles. “Those are good hacks though.” She says. “So, hold onto it or chuck it?” [[Hold onto it]] [[Chuck it]]

''The folded articles you grabbed at breakfast this morning, a compass, and a dog tooth brush'' Kerry holds up the dog tooth brush and raises her eyebrows. “Nope.” You say by way of explanation. She drops it onto the pile and picks up the compass. You shrug. “Might come in handy?” You say weakly. Kerry shakes her head at you and wordlessly lets it drop onto the discard pile. Then she picks up the articles you stuffed into your bag that morning and unfolds them. “What are these?” She asks. You feel your face redden. “Somehow, this morning, I thought this might be easy to fake. I grabbed those as a last minute thought, in case I needed to rustle up some self-care knowledge in a hurry. I…I don’t know what I was thinking." Kerry reads the article titles: (if: $haircare is true)["Hair care, is it all it’s cracked up to be? My Cheekbones, Myself: Highlighting the Good, Hiding the Bad?"](elseif: $dryskin is true)["Dry skin dilemmas-are you over-sloughing? Beers, Beards and Backyards-how hipsters are ruining the noble art of facial hair?!"] (elseif: $dandruff is true)["Dandruff for Dummies-fix the flakes and prevent lice at the same time! Kiss your Manicurist Goodbye-Nailcare for Everyone?!"] “These sound like they came from one of those discount drug store magazines.” She giggles. “They did.” You admit gravely. Kerry stops laughing. “Oh Vanessa.” She says. “I know.” You say, looking at your feet. “I was just…” “Look.” Says Kerry. “You did something that could have gotten you fired, that could have ruined your chances at ever doing something like this show, but instead, you got handed a chance. So embrace the chance. What are you thinking right now?” [[“I’m such an idiot.”]] [[“This is too good to be true.”]] [[“I don’t deserve this.”]]

''Tea lights, a tiny motherboard, and a robot glove'' Kerry holds up the tiny motherboard. “It’s from an earpiece.” You explain. “It seemed interesting at the time. I thought I might make something with it.” “But then it disappeared into the black hole?” Asks Kerry. “Yes.” You say. “And now, I can’t remember what I was holding onto it for.” Kerry lets it fall onto the pile and picks up the tea lights. You shake your head. “No idea.” You say. “I have no memory of even putting those in there.” Kerry lets the tea lights drop and picks up the robot glove. “Ok, that is the coolest thing ever!” You say grabbing it out of her hand. It is a sleek, black glove with LED lights embedded at each joint of the finger and connected with a series of fusible fabric circuits. You press the tiny ON pad and watch the lights light up and then blink rhythmically. “Cool.” Says Kerry. “But you only have one.” “You are only supposed to have one.” You tell her. “It doesn’t just look cool, you can also use it to talk on your phone.” You put the glove on and hold it up to your ear with your thumb hovering in front of your ear and your pinky finger in front of your mouth. “It syncs with your phone and you use it to talk.” “Ok, that is a cool gadget.” Says Kerry. “But does it Ignite Happiness?” You nod vigourously. “Yes.” You say. “It absolutely does.” You switch it off and tuck it into your bag. “See.” Says Kerry. “You’re pretty good at this.” “Yeah.” You say hesitantly. “But, what if the thing you need to get rid of isn’t a physical thing?” You ask. “What if it’s a thought or a belief?” “Those are a bit harder.” Kerry says. “What I do when I want to see if a belief I have still Ignites Happiness is: I write it down and I spend a minute looking at the words. I can usually tell if it Ignites Happiness just by reading the words back to myself.” “What if you can’t tell?” You ask. Your question feels oddly urgent, but you don’t know why. “Then you let it rest while you do something else. Something hands on, or practical. Something you don’t have to think very hard about.” “That seems very hard.” You say. “Oh, it is hard.” She says. “That’s what makes it worth doing.” She sits down next to you. “You did something that could have gotten you fired, that could have ruined your chances at ever doing something like this show, but instead, you got handed a chance.” She says. “Let go of the rest and embrace the chance. What are you thinking right now?” [[“I’m such an idiot.”]] [[“This is too good to be true.”]] [[“I don’t deserve this.”]]

''I’m keeping it'' “Ok!” Says Kerry. “We’re almost finished. Tell me, how do you feel about these?” She picks up: [[A broken mouse trap, a tiny battery powered fan, and a dryer sheet.|Mouse trap]] [[The folded articles you grabbed at breakfast this morning, a compass, and a dog tooth brush|Articles]] [[Tea lights, a tiny motherboard, and a robot glove|Tea lights]]

''I don’t need to keep it'' “Great!” Says Kerry letting it fall onto the pile. “One more round to go.” She holds up: [[A broken mouse trap, a tiny battery powered fan, and a dryer sheet.|Mouse trap]] [[The folded articles you grabbed at breakfast this morning, a compass, and a dog tooth brush|Articles]] [[Tea lights, a tiny motherboard, and a robot glove|Tea lights]]

''Hold onto it'' “I’m going to hold onto it.” You say confidently. “I love a good life hack.” Kerry nods and hands you the dryer sheet. “Can I suggest one thing?” She asks. “Sure.” “Keep it in a ziplock bag instead of just loose in your purse.” You nod. “Got it.” You say, stuffing it back into your bag. Kerry laughs and throws up her arms in surrender. “So, now, you should only have things in your bag that Ignite Happiness and help you move forward.” “What if the thing you need to get rid of isn’t a physical thing?” You ask. “What if it’s a thought or a belief?” “Those are a bit harder.” Kerry says. “What I do when I want to see if a belief I have still ignites happiness is: I write it down and I spend a minute looking at the words. I can usually tell if it ignites happiness just by reading the words back to myself.” “What if you can’t tell?” You ask. Your question feels oddly urgent, but you don’t know why. “Then you let it rest while you do something else. Something hands on, or practical. Something you don’t have to think very hard about.” “That seems very hard.” You say. “Oh, it is hard.” She says. “That’s what makes it worth doing.” She sits down next to you. “You did something that could have gotten you fired, that could have ruined your chances at ever doing something like this show, but instead, you got handed a chance.” She says. “Let go of the rest and embrace the chance. What are you thinking right now?” [[“I’m such an idiot.”]] [[“This is too good to be true.”]] [[“I don’t deserve this.”]]

''Chuck it'' “Ok.” Says Kerry letting it float down onto the pile. “So, now, you should only have things in your bag that Ignite Happiness and help you move forward.” “What if the thing you need to get rid of isn’t a physical thing?” You ask. “What if it’s a thought or a belief?” “Those are a bit harder.” Kerry says. “What I do when I want to see if a belief I have still ignites happiness is: I write it down and I spend a minute looking at the words. I can usually tell if it ignites happiness just by reading the words back to myself.” “What if you can’t tell?” You ask. Your question feels oddly urgent, but you don’t know why. “Then you let it rest while you do something else. Something hands on, or practical. Something you don’t have to think very hard about.” “That seems very hard.” You say. “Oh, it is hard.” She says. “That’s what makes it worth doing.” She sits down next to you. “You did something that could have gotten you fired, that could have ruined your chances at ever doing something like this show, but instead, you got handed a chance.” She says. “Let go of the rest and embrace the chance. What are you thinking right now?” [[“I’m such an idiot.”]] [[“This is too good to be true.”]] [[“I don’t deserve this.”]]

(if: $find_forward is true)[ Find a way forward you can be proud of.](if: $change_outside is true) [ Making a change on the outside can lead to a change on the inside.](if: $start_are is true) [ Start where you are and build on that.](if: $grab_chance is true) [ Always grab a chance.](if: $can_do is true) [ Focus on what you CAN do, not on what you don’t yet know you can do.](if: $step_by_step is true) [ Make a plan and take it step by step.](if: $slow_down is true) [ Slow down so you can know your own mind.](if: $simple_better is true) [ Simple is always better.](if: $moving_forward is true) [ Keep moving forward.](if: $no_longer_need is true) [ Let go of what you no longer need.](if: $right_moment is true) [ Focus on what feels right in the moment.](if: $good_enough is true) [ You don’t have to be perfect. Learn to be happy with ‘Good Enough’.](if: $everyday_things is true) [ It’s important to not let the everyday things overwhelm you. Find a healthy solution that works so you don’t have to worry about it again.](if: $too_much is true) [ Don’t try to take on too much at once. Build up to where you want to be slowly and steadily and adjust as you go.] Not bad for your first day, you think with quiet pride. Tomorrow is going to be even better! End [[Credits]]

''Outside the Production Trailer'' “Back to the Commissary everyone.” Says Toni. “This situation calls for warm drinks and a baked good.” You trail along behind the group as they weave their way through the tangle of trailers along the now well-worn path to the Commissary. “That was some fast thinking in there.” Says Grey pulling out a chair for you at the round table in the back corner. Magenta smiles. You collapse into the chair and look around. No one looks angry or like they are about to yell at you and you feel your heart slow to a more normal pace. Toni arrives with a tray laden with steaming mugs of coffee and a plate heaped with chocolate croissants. “Here, eat.” She says. Everyone takes a mug and a pastry. “I’m so sorry about this you guys…” You say. Magenta cuts you off. “There’s no point in more apologizing.” She says kindly. “You can’t change the past, but you can make the most of this opportunity.” “And, in fact, we expect you to make the most of this opportunity.” Adds Grey sternly. “Because you have definitely made our jobs harder.” You nod. “It’s not going to be easy, Vanessa.” Says Robbie. “You have a lot to learn in a short amount of time. But we’ve all been in tough situations where we have made decisions we weren’t proud of, so we are going to do our best to help you weather this one.” “So, are we ready to get started?” Asks Toni. You nod, feeling worried and excited at the same time. “Right.” Says Grey. “Here’s how it’s going to work. You are going to have one session with each of us where we are going to help you develop your Self-Care style and find your areas of expertise. You are probably a lot more talented than you think you are already. We’re going to use that. Anything you can’t do, or can’t learn to do in a week or two, we’ll get an “assistant” to do for you until you learn how to do it yourself." You marvel at the ease with which these women have pivoted to help you. “So.” Says Grey. “Are we ready to get this party started?” There is a chorus of enthusiastic ‘yesses’ around the table. Grey looks at you intently. “I’ll do my best to make this worth it for all of you.” You say. “Great.” Says Grey. “Which session would you like to start with?” [[Finding your Fashion Philosophy with Grey|Fashion]] [[Making the Most of What You’ve Got with Magenta|Therapy]] [[Self-Care By Design with Robbie|Design]] [[Inside Out with Kerry|Organization]] [[Food for Thought with Toni|Food]]

''Resign'' “Listen everyone.” You say. “I have something to tell you.” Steve puts his iPad down and looks at you, worried. “I have to leave the show.” You blurt in a breathless rush. You glance around the table and see the others staring at you, eyes wide with shock. Steve sets down his iPad carefully. “I’m sorry, what?” He says. You take a deep breath. “I don’t think I can continue with the show.” You say. “I’m sorry for wasting your time. I hope you find the perfect person to be the Self-Care Stylist, but I don’t think it’s me.” Steve stares at you for a minute, stunned. “I don’t understand what is happening here.” He says. Grey stands up smoothly and adjusts her hair with a flick of her head. “I think it’s obvious Steve.” She says. “Vanessa is quitting the show.” “But why?!” Wails Steve. “Good question.” Says Grey turning to look at you. “Why are you quitting the show?” [[You decide to get this over with as quickly as you can.|Get it over with 2]] [[You decide to tell them the truth.|Truth 2]]

''You decide to cut your losses and run'' I’m so sorry.” You say again. “I can’t explain and I don’t want to make this worse. But please believe me when I tell you that you are better off without me.” Magenta stands up and comes over to where you are standing. “Is this because you think you don’t have enough experience?” She asks. “Something like that.” You mutter. “But we will help you!” She says. “Come on.” Says Toni, joining the crowd at the door. “You’re part of the team and we haven’t even started yet. You can’t give up on us now!” You look around at the beautiful, friendly, talented women in the room and: [[Decide to tell them the truth.|Truth 2]] [[Decide that you just can’t face it.|Can't face it 2]]

(align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[''Kweens Without Krowns''] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[by Kim Stark] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[''Production Support''] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[Alexander Little] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[''Cover Art''] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[Kim Stark] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[''Cover Art Model''] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[Ashton Otten] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[''Beta Testers''] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[Mika Little] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[Faewyn Stark] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[Lizz Ketchabaw] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[Derek Anderson] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[Gracie Yolkowskie] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[Andrew Horgan] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[Heather Harder] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[Lauren Sigouin]

(align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[''Kweens Without Krowns''] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[by Kim Stark] (align:"=><=")+(box:"X=")[[[Start now!|Beginning]]]